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Thread: Best "You might Be A Redneck If . . . " Joke Of All Time?

  1. #1

    Best "You might Be A Redneck If . . . " Joke Of All Time?


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    Inspired by Dave Brown's hillbilly DNA, I decided to show off a bit of my own.

    The entire Busse clan hails from Kentucky and Jennifer's dad was a West Virginia coal miner who grew up in the same area of WV where they filmed "October Sky".

    Here's one of the best Jeff Foxworthy "Redneck" jokes . . . . and he never even used it! ( He thought it might be a bit too hot of a topic)

    "If you think that Roe vs. Wade is a fishing decision. . . You might be a redneck!"

    Classic!

    Bring your best,

    Jerry

    .

  2. #2
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    Brilliant

  3. #3
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    My Dad was born (raised in part) in Quantico Va, and both his folks are from the South, my grandmother's family is based out of Florida where they are and have been Peanut Farmers for many generations. The family slogan is "Working for Peanuts".

    You might be a Redneck if you carry a fishing pole into SeaWorld.

  4. #4
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    I have always been partial to these:

    "If you think a chainsaw is a musical instrument ... you might be a redneck."

    and

    "If you think a subdivision is part of a math problem ... you might be a redneck."

    But that's just me. A scientist who grew up a redneck in old, central California farming country.

    [And remember -- if your dog and your wallet are both on a chain ...]

  5. #5
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    Steven

    www.sablade.com The Home of Knife Discussion in South Africa

    I WANT TO BUY BUSSE S.L.U.T.'s CLICK >>HERE<<


  6. #6
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    How do you circumcise a redneck..........

    Kick his sister in the jaw


    One of my favorite "Redneck" musicians

    Seasick Steve

    WANTED: Silent Knight , 2 Bolt Badger , Steel Heart 1 (with side stamp), Lil Ugly
    Busse Paraphernalia...patches, letters, magazines, boxes, original ad or articles
    Well.....here I am ~ Jubal Early
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  7. #7
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    If somebody hollers, "Hoedown!" and your girlfriend hits the floor...!
    ~Jeff Foxworthy (who pretty much owns 'em all. )

    Lexi & Pokey ROCK!!!
    BOLO: Poached Bose Lottery Zulu Spear (link)
    "Mal. Guy killed me, Mal. He killed me with a sword. How weird is that?" ~'Mr. Universe'
    Platinum Member - Busse Forum Moderator

  8. #8
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    Your Busse collection is worth more than your trailer
    Buy Brown Kydex
    WTB; Busse HACK Bear Cubs ! Especially the Ram's Horn one !!!!
    azgunnut@earthlink.net


  9. #9
    You think the stock market has a fence around it.
    your home has more miles on it than your car.
    In an effort to lower cholesterol, you switch to spam lite
    Your house doesn't have curtains, but your car does.
    You use the O on a stop sign to sight in your new rifle

    Those are some of my favorites

  10. #10
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    If your mother can tell a state trooper to f*!# off without taking the Marlboro out of her mouth.
    - Jeff Foxworthy

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by David Brown View Post
    Your Busse collection is worth more than your trailer
    OMG ... I AM a redneck!!!

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jerry Busse View Post
    "If you think that Roe vs. Wade is a fishing decision. . . You might be a redneck!"
    Jerry
    Jerry, I do a LOT of fishing... Love this!!!

    Also - October Sky was a GREAT movie! (I'm in the Aerospace biz)
    "Heh heh heh. That's not a knife... THAT'S A KNIFE!!!" Mick D., 1986
    "Engineers don't idle well."
    Freedom is NOT Free!!! THANK YOU to those who serve this GREAT country!!!

  13. #13
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    You might be a Redneck if you actually do wake up in the doghouse
    Last edited by RedbeAR15; 09-12-2011 at 08:53 PM.
    What's Next?

  14. #14
    If your family tree does not split...
    Hoggin' Vox

  15. #15
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    i was raised in ky but live in wv now. I think folks in wv talk kind of like the gay teacher off of family guy. ah ooh nahooo or something like that. its hard to spell. folks in wv think i talk funny too though...

    if a relative is known as....uncle papaw bubby---------you might be a redneck

    if you move to wv and think you now live with yankees-------you might be a redneck

    if you mow the lawn and find a car------you guys know whats next

  16. #16
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    If you have sex with your cousin?
    If your car leaks oil?
    If you have mustache?
    If you watch NASCAR?

    I don't know that guy.

    Let's drink.

  17. #17
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    You just might be a redneck if........You ever got too drunk to fish.

    Wow there ARE a lot of red necks here in minnesota.

  18. #18
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    ken-tuck where teeth are optinal and the sheep are use to it.
    Last edited by oge14; 09-12-2011 at 10:19 PM.

  19. #19
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    a city boy was drivin through hardensburg, and his wife said honey i have to use the bathroom. well being a man of the city he paid no heed to his women.

    about sample Rd. she was in dire need of a relief. as they passed the old druther's resturant she was in able the hold her movement's. and pressed her flank's out the window for all too see.

    as they passed the wal mart, she released her tension.

    two ole boy's riddled with age caught the brunt of her release.

    the first one wiped his face and spoke "danm chewing bacca"

    the second said as he sopped his brow "yeah but did you see the cheek's on that one!!
    Last edited by oge14; 09-12-2011 at 10:18 PM.

  20. #20
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    If you have a house on wheels and a vehicle on blocks...

    If you are mesmerized every time a toilet flushes...

    If being asked "Were you raised in a barn?" is answered yes with a straight face...

    If your first date ended on a haystack...

    If you join the military to have an easier life...

    If your house is on fire and you can meet the fire department halfway to save time...

    If your truck (or gun or INFI collection) costs more than your entire education...

    If your wife or a female family member holds the county record... in peeing for distance....


    I'm not confessin' which ones are personally applicable...
    Freedom is expensive, but you get what you pay for and a life worth living is worth fighting for to the end.
    AZHamT 2011

    Current Bussekin for sale

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