Originally posted by paranoid9999:
Cougar, please help here. I would like to hear what you have to say here? I am curious as what you think is good form? This will illuminate me in my future transactions on the forums.
Well, as I keep saying I'm not the judge here; I'm only a moderator ... but I think I can comment on the general case.
People get offended at offers they consider too low, and people get offended by comments on their offers -- it happens all the time. It probably happens more often on the net because of the lack of expression in text, sometimes people read plain text in ways that the author didn't intend, but it happens irl too. I've been at shows and seen dealers in a rage over an offer someone made them, and customers in a rage over the response they got from a dealer to an offer they made.
I think it's an admissible topic for this forum; people can discuss the etiquette of negotiation, whether it's rude to try making a low offer for something or not, and whether it's rude to respond to an offer you consider too low in heated or satiric terms ... why not?
I see it as a question of etiquette rather than a question of ethics. I can't imagine banning anyone from the forums for making a low offer, even if he offers $10 for a Sebenza, and as for responses to an offer you consider too low ... well, we do have a rule against personal attacks on the forums ... but you can certainly express your opinion of an offer without attacking the person who made that offer....
As for Mickey77 and Owl ... I'm not even sure exactly what happened here. Was there some kind of misunderstanding? Did Mickey77 take Owl's post as a serious offer to make an even trade, Whirlwind for Mini-Stryker, and then Owl told him he'd meant it as a satiric comment? Or did Mickey email Owl offering "lots of money" in addition to the knife in trade but Owl thought even with "lots of money" the offer was too low and said so in terms that Mickey felt were insulting? I don't know what's going on here exactly, but whatever it is, it seems to be a relatively minor misunderstanding, isn't it?
I see a bunch of people in this thread saying Owl's post wasn't such a big deal, and now I see David1967 saying it isn't such a big deal that Mickey got upset and started this thread either, which also makes sense to me.
Seems to me in such matters, however low an offer somebody makes may be, however heated a response to an perfectly reasonable offer might be ... why get upset about it? People will make you offers you consider unreasonably low, people will respond to offers you make in ways you consider rude, sometimes there isn't any misunderstanding involved at all and the other guy really is making a ridiculously low offer or responding angrily to a perfectly reasonable offer -- that's going to happen. It isn't part of every negotiation but it's an inherent risk of the negotiation process.
Personally, if someone offers me $10 for a Sebenza I don't get upset about it; I just say no, and if somebody gets all upset and accuses me of making a ridiculous offer because I asked him if he'd take $5 less for it, curses me out, whatever, I don't have to get upset just because he is ... I just go on to the next table or the next thread.
Some people are more inclined to get upset in the course of negotiations than I am, and if some of those people want to complain about the rudeness of making excessively low offers or the rudeness of responding angrily to offers less than the asking price, I think that's an admissible topic for this forum and people can discuss it ... I might consider it a waste of energy, but we can have discussions that I consider a waste of energy, as long as they're more or less on topic and reasonably civil....
-Cougar :{)
P.S. Sometimes you will think you've reached an agreement and then the other guy will change his mind, too. That can be disappointing if you were all fired up about the deal, but ... that's another thing that is going to happen sometimes ... you might as well learn to live with it....
:{)
[This message has been edited by Cougar Allen (edited 03-19-2000).]