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Disturbing Relevance to My Work

Phil Elmore

Phil Elmore

Joined
Feb 28, 2002
Messages
7,636
As some of you know, I am a professional technical writer and have been for a decade. Among the industrial equipment about which I have written (on top of and under which I have climbed, behind which I have dodged to avoid forklifts, and around which I have hastened to take illustrative photos) are the machines that make and inspect glass bottles. I know far more about the making of glass bottles than is necessary for any human being to know.

You flashlight gearheads may be interested to know that one of the ways such bottles are inspected for defects is to strobe a bank of LEDs so a camera and computer can analyze the images that result. A bottle is analyzed for two different types of defects -- dimensional defects, which are flaws in the shape of the bottle, and sidewall defects, which are flaws in the glass itself (inclusions, "birdswings" of glass that stretch across the interior, etc.).

My lovely wife was taking a Snapple from the refrigerator the other day when she showed me the glass bottle. I got all excited. "Hey, this is a dimensional defect! This bottle should have been culled at the factory! It never should have made it through!"

How she does not think me insane I could not say, given that this type of behavior is not all that uncommon for me.

bottledefect.jpg

Dimensional defect in glass Snapple bottle
 
I reckon it has a face that looks like the new pope. You could sell it on Ebay as a psychic bottle!
 
A thalidomide bottle. I would contact the company with the evidence and threaten to go public with it unless they put you on the Board of Directors, with full pay and privileges.
 
At one of my former jobs, 4-byte hex codes were used to indicate problems. After diagnosing and debugging broken equipment for many months, these codes were firmly stuck in my head, and I started seeing them everywhere.

One time I was walking behind some stores, and a dumpster had a specific sequence of letters and numbers on it, which immediately made me say "Uh oh...looks like that dumpster just got a null pointer exception". Friends and family members do start questioning a person's sanity and/or social skills when they hear stuff like that. And possibly for good reason.

:confused: :footinmou :D

By the way, I hope that only the bottle is defective. I would be more afraid of the contents. I guess it's apple juice, but it looks sort of disturbing to me.
 
Well, the label does have "All natural" written on it. I will admit though that it is not apparent what the "all natural" substance might be!
 
I was going to come in here with something enlightening to say but I , uh, hmmm.........................

SEBENZA!!!!!
 
K.V. Collucci said:
I was going to come in here with something enlightening to say but I , uh, hmmm.........................

SEBENZA!!!!!
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Do you think if I put my Sebenza and my SnG in a drawer together for a while they might breed something REALLY good?
 
gajinoz said:
Do you think if I put my Sebenza and my SnG in a drawer together for a while they might breed something REALLY good?
Click to expand...
You would have to take that question to the Blade Discussion Forum. :p
 
Sue Snapple for loss of marital consortium: I'm sure your wife is not in the mood for sex while she's rolling her eyes and sadly shaking her head at your comments.
Also: is there a finger in the bottle? Maybe you can sue Wendy's, too..
 
Through various professional connections, I can no longer look with any neutrality at shoes, granite countertops, broadcast advertising, & printing- among other things. It's terrible when you're running a finger over a 'flaw' & muttering to yourself...
 
Interesting, I wonder if it has any collector value, I have been saving an old Coke bottle that I once got with the wrong cap.

I remember once in Mexican news someone showed a local brand soda bottle with a dead fly inside :eek: :barf: .

Luis
 
I have been saving an old Coke bottle that I once got with the wrong cap.
Click to expand...
Brother-in-law showed me a brand new Disney video that was blank. He was going to keep it to collect because he imagined a faulty Disney product to be rare.

I told him, "Then get me a magnet, and I'll turn all your videos into collectibles."

Good luck with the bottle. Best bet, sent it to Snapple with an angry letter. They might send you a coupon for a new drink. :)

-Bob
 
Back during Christmas I was in a toy store when a lady came in to return a WWF action figure. The figure was different than what was inside. The cleck talked her out of returning it. She said it would be worth a lot on Ebay.

I second the motion to sell it on Ebay. :D
 
Amazing: we've become a culture that celebrates errors, that values mistakes, and that seeks out and glorifies the wrong.

I guess it's part of celebrating diversity and being non-judgemental, eh?
 
Gollnick said:
Amazing: we've become a culture that celebrates errors, that values mistakes, and that seeks out and glorifies the wrong.

I guess it's part of celebrating diversity and being non-judgemental, eh?
Click to expand...
Nope, it's the never ending quest to satisfy greed.


(Yes, I'm in a bad mood today)
 
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