Most Embarrassing Knife Moments

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Brian C

Joined
Jan 22, 1999
Messages
2,414
I think it might be fun to share some "most embarrassing knife moment" stories so I'll start with mine.

Like most folks, I limit the selection of knives that I carry when traveling via commercial airlines. My almost constant companion on such trips is a Tekna Hidden Edge. At barely more than an ounce and with a 2 3/4" skeleton blade & composite handle, it never set off an metal detector... that is, an airport metal detector.

My family had joined me in DC and wanted to see the White House. Not giving my pocket contents a second thought, off I went... right into the hands of the Secret Service.

With an agent on each arm, I was taken aside for a search. After examining it & finally determining that the knife was not an "illegal concealed weapon", they returned it to me and allowed me to continue. (FWIW, the agent handling it had no idea how it opened.) I caught up to my family later since my wife decided to pretend she didn't know me and kept walking!

Apparently, not all metal detectors are created equally.

Brian
 
I can't think of a good exmaple in my own life, but my older brother was at a knife store, showing a friend how the Benchmade 975 could be closed with one hand, when he proceeded to close it on his thumb, cutting right down to the bone. Blood came pouring out, and he had severed the tendon on the top of his thumb. Everybody just stood there for a second, and he opened the blade a little, set the knife down, and wrapped his thumb with his bandanna.

The owner was mostly worried that he would be sued for letting my brother do such a stupid thing, but my brother would never even consider such an asinine course. He apologized profusely to the shop owner for being such a bone-head, and for getting the knife dirty. His thumb came out fairly okay, they were even able to reconnet the tendon, although not completely. He tells the story all the time, and uses a different technique now for closing liner lock folders with one hand!!!

Thomas

 
When I was a kid (about 8yrs old), a friend and I were "playing" with my meager knife collection. I was holding a Buck 110 blade up with my arm fully extended. My friend for some reason grabed my wrist and I pulled away. Learning quickly about concepts of physics like potential energy and resistance, he let go and the point of the blade thudded against my skull right between my eyes. Lots of blood but no real damage, other than a bruised ego and temporary terror. It was, however, a very valuable lesson learned at a young age.
 
I've had too many stupid knife moments - dropping knives, cutting myself with knives, fumbling in the middle of quick draws, etc.

The embarrassing knife moment that really stands out: I cut my pinkie to the bone on the saw-toothed edge of my REKAT Pocket Hobbit. Needless to say, it served as a very potent reminder that, unlike my other folders, the Pocket Hobbit has a DOUBLE edge, not a single edge.

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Win
Knife lover, Philosopher, Humanitarian, and All-around nice guy
(all right, so I'm just a knife lover)
 
I've got two stories, one happened to me the other to my Dad.
Long, long ago, in a universe far, far away... I was a stupid young man fooling around with a co-worker. Opened my knife to trim a fingernail; co-worker pulls out his pocketknife and says "En Garde"; we both strike elegant fencing poses and feint at each other, except we met in the middle and my blade smoothly sliced open his thumb. The look on our faces was priceless I'm sure, as we, stunned, watched his blood spill on the floor. Suffice it to say, I've not done THAT again. (he was ok)
The other was when I was really small, about 7 yrs or so. My Dad was showing me how to throw his small fixed blade knife into the tree in our front yard; he throws the knife, it hits handle first and comes shooting back like a rocket, point first right into (and thru) the toe of his boot. He did some credible dancing and cursing and that was the end of our knife thowing lesson.
Hmmmm, do you suppose dumb knife moments are in my genes ?
 
Well, let me be perfectly clear from the start... I'm a complete idiot and should not be allowed to own sharp shiny objects.

Now that that's out of the way... I was showing my wife how neat it was to snap the blade open on my new SOCOM M/A. Only problem is that I was letting my 11 year-old son hold the knife while I held his hand in mine. I went to make the "wave" motion to flick the blade open when the knife went flying. In my infinate wisdom I tried to grab the knife before it hit the ground. Luckily, I just knicked my thumb enough to draw a little blood. My wife thought that I got off easy... She was right. She got great satisfaction that I made myself look like a complete idiot. As usual.
redface.gif


Kelly

Kelly

[This message has been edited by Senator (edited 22 January 1999).]
 
My embarrassing story occurred years ago when I was in college. Late one night I was playing with my custom Benchmade balisong knife with a wee-hawk (1/2 double edge) blade. I began to question the adequacy of the integral guard. So I decided to test the guard by holding the knife in a reverse grip in my right hand while I pulled the handle with my left hand. My hand slid on the blade resulting in a severed pinky tendon. After a tendon graft followed by one month in a cast and months of physical therapy my pinky still wasn't back to normal. To this day it still doesn't curl up right.

Axel
 
AFCK, unbeknownst to me, somehow managing to jump out of my pocket while dancing. Fancy dress, private party for a friend's birthday.

Suddenly this rather large woman starts waving a closed knife around the dance floor. I go to condition red. My AFCK isn't where it should be. I'm reaching for the Mini-AFCK in my left pocket, when it dawns on me she's searching for the knife's owner. Sheesh.

Lesson learned - don't trust the clip when wearing thin suit pants and doing some major boogying.

Joel
 
Recently acquired some Stiff Kisses. Not liking the thin handle, I proceeded to wrap them with paracord while holding the knife still sheathed. Being careful to maintain pressure on the cord, while pulling up and away with my right hand... pulled it right out of the sheath. Guess where my other thumb was? Yup, right next to the opening of the sheath. Stained my new Levis, the floor, and bath towel! The 1.5 " long deep slit is still throbbing. But nobody was around when it happened.(:^)

L8r,
Nakano
 
I think we've all lived in a neat neighborhood at one time or another. When I lived in northern California (during one of my stints in that still ever weird state), a few of my neighbors and I used to rotate hosting sunday brunches. Keep in mind that I was a single parent and 2 of the other 4 families were headed by single parent females
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. Those 2 gals just never could let me go it alone in my kitchen despite my protestations and the fact that I am rather adept at cooking (as my now middle aged and ever widening waistline will attest). Sure enough, I'm dicing away at rocket speed when one of these lovelies brushes up against my back in her thin summer dress drooping her chin over my shoulder to see how things are going. Being the hot blooded type that I am, my conscious mind wanders to the pleasant sensations aft as I proceed to nicely chop my thumb with rapid strokes about 3/4 of the way down my thumbnail. The stirrings I was feeling were immediately and irrevokably displaced as the diced scallions floated on the cutting board in my blood. Needless to say they don't serve brunch in the ER where my injury required me to go. On a more serious note, we were all reminded that crowded kitchens, friendly body contact, and knives dont mix
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! And just to give a further hint as to how mischeivous those gals were, I was greeted with a Bloody Mary upon my return from the hospital......

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-=[Bob]=-

Keep yer powder dry and cutters hair poppin' sharp!



[This message has been edited by bald1 (edited 23 January 1999).]
 
I had a very similar experience as Joel.
I went to an elegant dinner party to my wife's associate's house. We had just walked into the house and were standing in the entry hall meeting her co-workers (all attorneys), as I started to remove my overcoat something hooked on to my AFCK and pulled it out of my waistband. The knife hit the marble floor, opened up half-way to expose the glorious black ti serrated edge and skidded to its stopping point at the feet of our hostess whom I had only moments before met for the first time. Conversation immediately stopped, all eyes focused in turn on the knife, then on me. My wife looked horrified. I made some small talk about a loose clip and awkwardly plucked it away from danger. Needless to say we have not been invited back yet
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.

Sincerely,
Nick B.
P.S.- My wife and I had a nice little chat about my knife collection that night on the drive home
frown.gif

 
Well a few of months ago after a couple of beers (rare for me) I’m sitting on the couch holding My D/A SOCOM and decide to show My Wife (who doesn’t understand my obsession with knives) the cool duel opening mechanism. Open it manually…now I’ll just close it one handed and wow Her with the auto mech.…eeeowww. Closed it on the tip of my thumb, almost took it off. Man that sucker is sharp. Wife again thought I’m a idiot, and couldn’t wait to tell our daughter. Knives and beer don’t mix.

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Take Care,

LD

"Every Dog Has His Day"






 
I have been waiting to write my dumb story in order to make sure I was not alone in idiotic happenings. Here goes. A couploe of weeks ago after buying a meyerco strut-n-cut I was of course playing withit while my wife was driving the car. As I tried to lock the blade with the unusual locking mechanism on of my fingers slipped over the extremely sharp blade and walla' red stuff. Well I got the bleeding stopped and of course, continued to play with the knife, even though my wife told me not to. Well, I don't know how many of you have played with a strut-n-cut, but it is spring loaded and opens and closes lightning fast. As I was closing the blade with my index finger, my middle finger was resting slightly over the path of the blade which closed with extreme force, cutting me quite deep. Well now I was mad and tossed the knife(closed of course) to what I thought was the floor board. The knife bounced of the edge of the dash and into the windshield, cracking the windshield nicely. So my $50 meyerco is now worth $500. Talk about stupid. My wife was furious, I was mad at myself and the knife didn't have a mark on it. This is by far the dumbest thing I have ever done, I think.


 
One evening, when my oldest daughter was about two, I heard her sweet voice saying, "Daddy, here, your naaaif!" I turned and saw her holding in her little hand my prized Spyderco Terzuola ... with its blade open! I just stared at her with sheer sense of terror for 0.2 seconds (how long it took for my optical neuron to travel to my brain), grabbed the knife away from her little hand, and, sure enough, saw a little cut on her finger. Lessens learned: 1) a Spyder hole plus a liner lock makes one great quick-opening knife, even a two year old can open it with ease!! 2) don't be dumb enough to leave a great quick-opening knife where a two year old can reach! (Next time, I'll tell you the time when I left my CS Master Tanto out of its sheath in my daughter's crib . . . just kidding! :-)

sjc
 
Actually, these are two different ones within about a week of each other.
First.. I was talking to this one girl I knew on the phone, with a cheap "China Super Springer Automatic" $10 OTF in my other hand. Needless to say, I was playing with it quite a bit. In-out-in-out-in.... but being sleep deprived, my pointer finger decided to go over the top of the knife... and it went IN my finger when the blade came OUT... not too deep, but it spilled enough blood on my sheets and pillow. Broke the action on the knife, too.
Then, a week later, still sleep deprived, and talking to the same girl at the same place, I was playing with a cheap Jaguar butterfly. Pretty knife, but also pretty cheap... also pretty sharp. Again, not paying much attention to the knife, it slipped through my hand and through my right middle finger. Result? Lots of blood running down my arm. It didn't even hurt then, but the next day when infection set in...
Lessons learned from these?
1. Thank God for Neosporin.
2. If you're going to play with knives, make sure you're paying attention and are well rested...
3. Some people are nothing short of a curse... and some people like me are just cursed (or stupid).
 
I was riding in my friends brand-new Blazer
when I decided to show him my brand-new Elishewitz M6. When I tried to pull the knife
out of my pocket, the thumb stud got caught
on my pocket (The Elishewitz Wave), my hand
slipped, and I nearly cut my index finger to
the bone. I bled all over myself and his new
Blazer. My friends reaction was, "oh well, it's just a car". Needless to say, a good
friend.

(Update: 1/24/99 23:10, just got my thumb in the way of my Emerson Commander, blood all over the place, you can get one of those sharp if you follow the "raise a burr, strop )

[This message has been edited by mgkrame (edited 25 January 1999).]
 
I am not repeating that story about me in the middle of the lake in my float tube when I accidentally dropped my Kershaw and punctured my vessel and rapidly sinking into 50 degree water with a stupid and I mean stupid expression on my face.


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~Greg~


[This message has been edited by Kodiak PA (edited 24 January 1999).]
 
Nakano2,
I was doing the exact same thing as you. Got a nice diagonal slice across the inside of my right middle finger. I look like I'm flipping everyone off when I'm driving.
smile.gif


Chi
 
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