- Joined
- May 18, 1999
- Messages
- 15,395
This isn't easy for me to talk about in such an open place but my little girl really needs help so here it is.
Some background:
My second wife and I adopted my little girl when she was six years old from the Oklahoma Dept. of Human Services.
She had been abused really, really bad, had a six inch scar on her abdomen from surgery required to put her back in some semblance of shape.
She had suffered more in her six little years than many people do in their entire lifetimes.
Then when she was eight her adopted mom and I divorced because she wished to be with another that she had been having an affair with for at least six months, maybe longer.
Her adopted mom, my ex-wife, had been abused by her father while her mom was in Talahina for treatment of tuberculoses when she was in her teens.
(Found out much, much later that he had also abused her younger sister.
)
(No charges were ever filed.)
When we divorced we both received counseling and I believed because of my ex-wife's past and the counseling that my little girl would be very much protected.
That however was far from realism.
I wasn't aware of what I'm going to tell now until my little girl was in her thirties, married and with three children of her own and had found me.
My little girl was 14 or 15 when the abuse started with her adopted mom's consent as she had had two back surgeries, enough excuse for her.
We had lost touch because my ex-wife's new husband didn't want either her or my little girl in any kind of contact with me.
And my ex-wife's parents upheld that decision although I did get bits and pieces of information about my little girl, most of them good, and the rest general teenage angst so I wasn't too concerned because of my ex-wife's past and what she told me her feelings were about child abuse.
She had told me numerous times she would kill any sonofabitch who touched her daughter.
I blame myself a great deal as I should've known better and at the very least insisted on something more, but I didn't.:grumpy:
A few years, not a real long time, ago I received a phone call around 9:00 or 10:00 p.m. with some guy asking if I knew (my ex-wife's name) and I asked, "Who wants to know?"
Come to find out it was my little girl's husband and he had tracked me down via the internet.
I had really mixed emotions, but I was also deliriously happy that my little girl and I was back in touch!!!!
Come to find out my ex-wife had filled my little girl's head with all kinds of bullshit!!!!
She had told my little girl that her and I had seperated about a year in which she became pregnant and manuvered incidents around so that after we got back together we were able to adopt her and that she was her real mother. :grumpy:
She also told my little girl that I hated her and never wanted to see her again.
My little girl, her husband, and the three grandkids I never knew I had, came up to visit the following Christmas.
We had a great time getting to know one another and even with all the bullshit that had happened in the past became a real family.
We got together and went and got her adoption records opened so that she could and would know the truth as it truly was.
Since then they have found her birth mother and her siblings and they have also became family.
Her biological father had walked west over the years in between, he was 72 at the time.
And since that time my little girl has came down with some bad illnesses.
She could almost be my natural child since she has been diagnosed with several illnesses that run in my family, Rheumatoid Arthritis. Iritis, and Diabetes and now Cancer.
The reason I'm writing this and asking for prayers for her is that I got a call from her yesterday.
She has now been diagnosed with Cancer.
She's been sick for quite some time and with the other illnesses figured it was just one or a combination of them acting up.
Recent X-rays has shown a growth on her liver.
The most recent shows that the cancer is around the neck of the liver and by one doctor has said that it's inoperable.
She is going for a biopsy next week and then another appointment with an oncologist.
I'm really concerned since my little girl is not a positive person at all and no matter what I've or anyone else has had to say doesn't seem to be inclined to be any other way.
The grandkids all have issues of their own, such as ADDD and Tourets Syndrome (one of them) and speech impediments, the other boy, which makes the fight even harder.
My little granddaughter is so very innocent because of being slow that she is going to need some kind of special care all or most of her life and I know that my little girl and her fine husband worry about this a lot.
My little girl has suffered enough in this world. I'm having a real hard time keeping the tears back.
Not even a bad or evil person deserves the suffering she has been through.
Please send Smoke, Prayers, or Whatever Good you work with to her.........
Some background:
My second wife and I adopted my little girl when she was six years old from the Oklahoma Dept. of Human Services.
She had been abused really, really bad, had a six inch scar on her abdomen from surgery required to put her back in some semblance of shape.
She had suffered more in her six little years than many people do in their entire lifetimes.
Then when she was eight her adopted mom and I divorced because she wished to be with another that she had been having an affair with for at least six months, maybe longer.
Her adopted mom, my ex-wife, had been abused by her father while her mom was in Talahina for treatment of tuberculoses when she was in her teens.
(Found out much, much later that he had also abused her younger sister.
)(No charges were ever filed.)
When we divorced we both received counseling and I believed because of my ex-wife's past and the counseling that my little girl would be very much protected.
That however was far from realism.
I wasn't aware of what I'm going to tell now until my little girl was in her thirties, married and with three children of her own and had found me.
My little girl was 14 or 15 when the abuse started with her adopted mom's consent as she had had two back surgeries, enough excuse for her.
We had lost touch because my ex-wife's new husband didn't want either her or my little girl in any kind of contact with me.
And my ex-wife's parents upheld that decision although I did get bits and pieces of information about my little girl, most of them good, and the rest general teenage angst so I wasn't too concerned because of my ex-wife's past and what she told me her feelings were about child abuse.
She had told me numerous times she would kill any sonofabitch who touched her daughter.
I blame myself a great deal as I should've known better and at the very least insisted on something more, but I didn't.:grumpy:
A few years, not a real long time, ago I received a phone call around 9:00 or 10:00 p.m. with some guy asking if I knew (my ex-wife's name) and I asked, "Who wants to know?"
Come to find out it was my little girl's husband and he had tracked me down via the internet.
I had really mixed emotions, but I was also deliriously happy that my little girl and I was back in touch!!!!
Come to find out my ex-wife had filled my little girl's head with all kinds of bullshit!!!!
She had told my little girl that her and I had seperated about a year in which she became pregnant and manuvered incidents around so that after we got back together we were able to adopt her and that she was her real mother.
:grumpy: She also told my little girl that I hated her and never wanted to see her again.
My little girl, her husband, and the three grandkids I never knew I had, came up to visit the following Christmas.
We had a great time getting to know one another and even with all the bullshit that had happened in the past became a real family.
We got together and went and got her adoption records opened so that she could and would know the truth as it truly was.
Since then they have found her birth mother and her siblings and they have also became family.
Her biological father had walked west over the years in between, he was 72 at the time.
And since that time my little girl has came down with some bad illnesses.
She could almost be my natural child since she has been diagnosed with several illnesses that run in my family, Rheumatoid Arthritis. Iritis, and Diabetes and now Cancer.
The reason I'm writing this and asking for prayers for her is that I got a call from her yesterday.
She has now been diagnosed with Cancer.
She's been sick for quite some time and with the other illnesses figured it was just one or a combination of them acting up.
Recent X-rays has shown a growth on her liver.
The most recent shows that the cancer is around the neck of the liver and by one doctor has said that it's inoperable.
She is going for a biopsy next week and then another appointment with an oncologist.
I'm really concerned since my little girl is not a positive person at all and no matter what I've or anyone else has had to say doesn't seem to be inclined to be any other way.
The grandkids all have issues of their own, such as ADDD and Tourets Syndrome (one of them) and speech impediments, the other boy, which makes the fight even harder.
My little granddaughter is so very innocent because of being slow that she is going to need some kind of special care all or most of her life and I know that my little girl and her fine husband worry about this a lot.
My little girl has suffered enough in this world. I'm having a real hard time keeping the tears back.
Not even a bad or evil person deserves the suffering she has been through.
Please send Smoke, Prayers, or Whatever Good you work with to her.........
