Last night a friend came over and I showed him my knife collection. He was amazed at the knives I had. Then the question came about, "how much did you pay for all of these". Well I added it up, $3280 just this year alone!. His wife jumped all over him and then my wife jumped all over me. I never hid anything from her or how much I spent. I make a good living and it is not like we are going broke with my hobbie here. She just does not see the attraction or the reason why I spend so much on knives. Then I told her that part of that was the gifts I bought for family and friends, including her. She said she would rather have something else. Man I thought I was going to get her interested in my hobbie so we could share something. Has this happened to any of you and if so what did you do?

I feel like I have no leg to stand on in this arguement with her. HELP!

Scuba Doo
As long as you're taking care of general business what the heck's the problem?

Jim March (rapidly adding up...ouch. A grand and change. Interesting...that would NOT have happened without the forums.)
David; you are not in trouble, you are in terminally deep kim chee. You might choose the safe quick route and drive into an overpass at 140mph., but if not, here is some advice.

First NEVER add up ANYTHING to see how much it has cost over time. It always makes things look worse. Do you recall your wife adding up, say, her makeup or wardrobe or jewelry expenditure over a year? I'll wager that if she has, you will never hear about it.

Second; learn how to have selective amnesia. For example: 'How much did these knives cost me? Well, that is hard to figure, it was just a little dab here and there; most were such bargains, that I can't really remember what I paid; but I certainly saved a lot of money!' (note the slipped in appeal to frugality)

Third; diversion. 'How much did these knives cost; well, let's see; that is really hard to figure; a lot of the knives were gifts to family and friends. I think that a knife makes a person more comfortable, and they are certainly useful little things, aren't they?
I know I get this warm feeling inside when I think of the people to whom I have given a tool which makes them more comfortable and safe.'

Fourth; appeal to fear: 'How much did these knives cost? It is really hard to put a value to their worth. Consider, honey (addressing your wife), if you were to use your knife to cut yourself (and/or dog, cat, baby) out of a car and get yourself and the little one to safety just before the car burst into flames. How much would that knife be worth?

Fifth; appeal to protective maternal instincts; 'How much are these knives worth? Well, I don't really know off the top of my head, but I do know that they are top quality, and will be handed down from generation to generation, providing use, protection, and comfort to our (hopefully) many decendents.'

Sixth; appeal to pride; 'How much did these knifes cost? I can't really say offhand, but the really great thing is that I have a wife who insists that I get whatever I want, not what I need. I am proud to say that I treat her the same way!' Do you think your wife is going to say, 'No, I am a skinflint, and he only gets the bare minimum to keep him happy.' Of course not. Be wary of this one, however, as it can lead to a considerable expenditure of the distaff side. Consider it an emergency option.

As for right now, you are beyond the groveling stage. You are deep into the bellycrawling over broken glass stage. I suggest flowers, wine, catching up on the 'honey-do' list, romantic dinners out, perhaps even a vacation.

Study psychology. Avidly.

Most importantly, avoid this situation in the future; be sure your brain is engaged before you engage your mouth. I say this as one who has been there, done that, got the t-shirt ripped off my back and shoved down my throat.

Lastly, do not despair. Simon Bolivar said that good judgement is the result of experience, and experience is the result of poor judgement.

Good Luck (man, do you NEED it) Walt

PS: Sasquatch; things are a little more complicated for H. sapiens sapiens.
Apparently someone has intimate experience with this particular dilemma.

Wow, Walt has it right on, especially the first comments about the wives spending (wasting!) money on new makeup and beauty stuff that they try out once and throw in a drawer.
I am a nice, sensitive husband, but I never balk when my wife wants to buy some new item that she doesn't need, and by goodness, she has no say over what I spend my money on. I never take out of our communal funds to buy knives, I spend my own hard earned extra spending money. I don't really get why so many guys go earn big bucks, and then their wife won't let them buy a little toy once in a while. I know a Doctor (noy on these forums) that makes like over a mil a year, and his wife won't let him have more than one Mad Dog because she thinks it is too much money for a knife. Not in my lifetime will that happen to me! Sorry, like I said, I am not one of these macho jerks of a husband who bosses his wife around like a slave, but, Hades will freeze over before she tells me what I can and can't buy with my own money.
(Of course I keep it reasonable and make sure that she gets lots of goodies too, it is always fair).

Oh, I like this logic:

"most were such bargains, that I can't really remember what I paid; but I certainly saved a lot of money!"

(I realize you're being ironic, Walt.)

Sort of like the Discover Card, you know--the one that "pays you cash" every time you buy something. Hell, the way I've got it figured, if I buy enough stuff, I may never have to work again!


Just for the record, (and a pox on all my cattle for mentioning it here) there is a similar thread going at KnifeForums.com
It's not so much what I paid for them at the time, but what their worth NOW! The knives I select for my collection increase in value over time, so I can't really say exactly what they are worth, just that they are worth more than I paid for them.

Well, I got into this problem when I started buying knives, All i had to do was point out how much I was saving on buying knives and not spending on them, Just say that a knife you bought was $30 under suggested retail, NEVER, repeat NEVER tell that you spent $150 on it. Remember, you saved money on the knife, not spent.

Good points everyone. Especially the make up deal. My wife had probalbly bought more in make up, hose and other woman crap than I have bought all year in knives. Of course her responese will be she bought all that to make herself look good for me!

Scuba Doo
David, hearing your sad story, two words popped into my head.




PS Listen to Walt!
Ya I get ya Joe,

I think Walt is my hero now! His points are dead on the money but the problem is women think differently then men and convincing them otherwise is hard to do. I wish DC or some other female could give me their point of veiw!

Scuba Doo
Stand tall...damnit! As someone mentioned your knives are investments, weather for your children or your old age. I know, you won't retire on what your collections worth...but it's a good arguement. I buy my wife a knife most every time I buy myself one or I'll give her a few guiltless $$ to blow! You are a Knife Collector, not a chameleon...you can't change your colors. By the way I have to agree never add them up...even your best friend will look at you cross eyed, unless of course he or she is a knife enthusiast. Non-knive lovers just don't get it! Try this one, "honey would you rather my hobby be collecting Beanie Babies...what a joke!" My philosophy weather collecting or dealing is: you are involved in the tool market...just like any other tool, people gotta have them. And let's face it there are worse investments out there. Buy her a little Spyderco Cricket Alum.Blk, it's a great knife for a lady...clips right to there purse unoticed!...You'll give her the fever! Hope this helps.


Your wife just dont have enough to worry about!!!!!!!! ;-0

Let her know that the grand total could have been spent sitting on a bar stool at 1 am, sipping Jack Daniels!!

All in fun.

Tell her:

"Knife collecting has been the only thing that helped me end my womanizing ways!"

Oh, and it would be good to add:

"...and you, honey."

Luckily, my girlfriend knew me for 2 years before we started dating, so I always remind her, "You knew the risks when you signed on..."

Clay Fleischer

"10,000 Lemmings Can't Be Wrong!"
Become a dealer. Then they're not an expense or an expensive collection. They're inventory or "demonstration samples."

OK now, every knife knut sell a knife to the knife knut on your right!



My point of view really isn't any different than most of the others.
If as you say, nothing else is hurting from the money spent on knives, and she either has her own earned spending money or access to some; then she has absolutely no right to bitch and give you grief about it. Its a 2 way street and I'm sure you could find excessiveness and or a subjective negative opinion on certain things or ways she spends money.

I'm not married, but I was engaged and lived with a guy for 5 yrs (together for 7)...we ironed that kinda stuff out real fast. And I was the one who got grief about how I chose to spend my money. I laid it out to him real simply: "biz is being taken care of (rent, utilities, etc); we have food; we go out for entertainment; we give each other ample attention; I love you and you love me. I don't bitch about your stupid Star Wars stuff except to nag you to put them in cases so they don't collect dust that I have to clean. So, if there isn't some emotional issue you have about me in general and this somehow reflects it, this topic is not subject to discussion or negotiation." Then I gave him a kiss and waited. He chose the better part of valor

David, You are forbidden
to post another thing until you post how much your wife has spent in the last year or two on:

* food that looked good at the store that didn't get eaten.

* shoes that hurt her feet that don't get worn.

* makeup, hair gels, curling irons, etc. that don't work the way she expected and don't get used.

* dry cleaning costs. if you don't have dry cleaning done reguarly you are in for real sticker shock.

* stuff (clothes, sneakers, fast food meals, toys, school fund raisers) bought for grown children or grandkids, etc. other than your nucleur family.

* miscellaneous

Show her the price tag for a decent .50 BMG rifle and tell her you want one for Christmas as a start to your new high powered rifle collection. Be sincere and get ready to take some heat.

Being a woman, (sorry DC...), she will likely extoll the expense of your knife collection as "bad enough!" and tell you that you cannot possibly be serious about starting somehting new.

Then in a day or two, tell her that she was right and you will just stick with knives.

Voila, everyone is happy.
(although, everytime you get into an argumnet for the next 10 years she'll throw up that "$3000 rifle" you wanted to buy, but such is married life)

Good Luck.
Well I guess I could just print out this thread and show it to her. Would that be a good idea?

Scuba Doo
I hate to even mention this guys, but..... my wife and I have been married almost 43 years. We both earned our own money as teachers, and shared it. Raised three kids, and now grandchildren. So much for background. We each buy what we want, as long as we have the money to cover it. The other day she was looking at an ad in AG's mens catalog for a custom Lake knife with gold and such.... for $10,000 dollars.
She said "why don't you buy it." Well I didn't, cause I don't have THAT kind of money, (sorry AG) but her attitude sure left me inspired! What a woman!