David; you are not in trouble, you are in terminally deep kim chee. You might choose the safe quick route and drive into an overpass at 140mph., but if not, here is some advice.
First NEVER add up ANYTHING to see how much it has cost over time. It always makes things look worse. Do you recall your wife adding up, say, her makeup or wardrobe or jewelry expenditure over a year? I'll wager that if she has, you will never hear about it.
Second; learn how to have selective amnesia. For example: 'How much did these knives cost me? Well, that is hard to figure, it was just a little dab here and there; most were such bargains, that I can't really remember what I paid; but I certainly saved a lot of money!' (note the slipped in appeal to frugality)
Third; diversion. 'How much did these knives cost; well, let's see; that is really hard to figure; a lot of the knives were gifts to family and friends. I think that a knife makes a person more comfortable, and they are certainly useful little things, aren't they?
I know I get this warm feeling inside when I think of the people to whom I have given a tool which makes them more comfortable and safe.'
Fourth; appeal to fear: 'How much did these knives cost? It is really hard to put a value to their worth. Consider, honey (addressing your wife), if you were to use your knife to cut yourself (and/or dog, cat, baby) out of a car and get yourself and the little one to safety just before the car burst into flames. How much would that knife be worth?
Fifth; appeal to protective maternal instincts; 'How much are these knives worth? Well, I don't really know off the top of my head, but I do know that they are top quality, and will be handed down from generation to generation, providing use, protection, and comfort to our (hopefully) many decendents.'
Sixth; appeal to pride; 'How much did these knifes cost? I can't really say offhand, but the really great thing is that I have a wife who insists that I get whatever I want, not what I need. I am proud to say that I treat her the same way!' Do you think your wife is going to say, 'No, I am a skinflint, and he only gets the bare minimum to keep him happy.' Of course not. Be wary of this one, however, as it can lead to a considerable expenditure of the distaff side. Consider it an emergency option.
As for right now, you are beyond the groveling stage. You are deep into the bellycrawling over broken glass stage. I suggest flowers, wine, catching up on the 'honey-do' list, romantic dinners out, perhaps even a vacation.
Study psychology. Avidly.
Most importantly, avoid this situation in the future; be sure your brain is engaged before you engage your mouth. I say this as one who has been there, done that, got the t-shirt ripped off my back and shoved down my throat.
Lastly, do not despair. Simon Bolivar said that good judgement is the result of experience, and experience is the result of poor judgement.
Good Luck (man, do you NEED it) Walt
PS: Sasquatch; things are a little more complicated for H. sapiens sapiens.
WW
