After watching all three Bourne movies...

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Dec 25, 2001
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... I am lead to believe that every CIA hitman just lies in bed staring at the ceiling all day, every day, until their top-secret orders arrive via their cell phone. And each one has at least one silenced pistol at their immediate disposal. Where do I sign up for this job??!!

steve
 
They are movies made for our entertainment and not documentaries.:D
 
... I am lead to believe that every CIA hitman just lies in bed staring at the ceiling all day, every day, until their top-secret orders arrive via their cell phone. And each one has at least one silenced pistol at their immediate disposal. Where do I sign up for this job??!!

steve

This is true, although a considerable amount of time is spent pissing off Irish terrorists and single-handedly fighting drug czars in South America.
 
You may want to start by reading

The Master of Disguise by Antonio Mendez and then Spy Dust by Antonio and Jonna Mendez. Both were top CIA covert operators. In fact, they met on-the-job and are now husband and wife.

These books are real. These two have been there and done that and now they're telling just a few of the tales.

Antonio, "Tony," started at the CIA as a graphic artist. After showing special talent in his routine graphic arts work, he was recruited to become an "authenticator." In the strage vernacular of the CIA, an "authenticator" is one who forges documents. And he became an expert at it.

One of the major uses of forged documents is "exfiltration." This means getting someone out of a foreign country when that country would rather that said person not leave. The obvious need is for forged travel documents, but what you really have to forge is a whole identity. If the cover is that this man is a traveling anvil salesman, then he'd better have, in his briefcase and wallet, receipts from hotels, restaurants, rental cars, a bus schedule from one of the cities he visited, a half-pack of matches from a bar in another city he visited, not to mention anvil brochures, an order pad with orders written on it, business cards from people he met with along the way, a half-finished expense report on a form bearing his company's logo, etc., etc., etc., right down to a wadded up cocktail napkin from the airport lounge in one of the cities along his forged trip. Some of that can be collected, but someone's got to go get it. And a lot of it will have to be forged. On one of his missions, the cover story was that the man being exfiltrated was a movie producer scoutting locations for an upcoming movie. This required forging a movie script.

But, it gets better than that. Tony has to get into this foreign country undercover himself with all of his materials and equipment, meet up with the local CIA people, forge all the documents, all of the related stuff, all of the "pocket litter," teach the person being exfiltrated to BE his cover character, and then get himself out too.

Tony did this so well that he rose to become the chief of "authentication" at the CIA.

He was typically accompanied by another person who was an expert in disguises who would disguise the person being exfiltrated. Tony realized that getting two technical experts in and out didn't just double the problems, it raised them to the power of two. So, he learned to do the disguise work too.

Tony came to do this so well that he became the chief of disguise too.

In fact, Tony learned to do this "exfiltration" stuff so well that he started to lead the teams and plan the missions.

His specialty became operations in the most difficult theater at the time, Soviet Russian, Moscow, right under the KGB's noses. He was a top covert operator.

Jonna started off as an "upstairs man" doing the most difficult breaking-and-entering jobs including the theft of a top-secret cypher machine from a Russian embasy, the stuff of Bond movies.

She, eventually, also got into the disguise unit and rose to take over from Tony as chief of disguise.

These books are absolute page turners. You'll love them.

To answer your question as to how to become a top CIA covert operator, the answer is that the CIA recruits for those positions from within. You'll have to start as a flat-foot pounding the pavements of some hell-hole somewhere in the world and distinguish yourself. They're hiring right now. The base salary is $52,180.
 
After watching all three Bourne movies...... I am lead to believe that every CIA hitman just lies in bed staring at the ceiling all day, every day, until their top-secret orders arrive via their cell phone... Where do I sign up for this job??!!
What about those movies where a bunch of hot chicks order pizzas, but don't have any money to pay for them? and then when the delivery guy arrives, they offer certain services in lieu of payment? I think Pizza Delivery Guy is the best job in the world, even better than CIA hitman (who lies in bed and stares at ceiling all day).
 
By the way, forging a passport is difficult enough, yes. But, you also have to forge all the stamps for all the countries this person is supposed to have entered and left. AND, you have to get them in the right places.

The last time I entered the US, the passport control officer seemingly deliberately turned to page 12 in my passport and stamped the entrance stamp -- the "cachet" as it's known in the business -- at a sort of jaunty angle right in the middle of the top row. A passport page is divided into two columns, entry cachets are supposed to go in the left column and exit cachets in the right column. I'm not a "neat freak" person, but I do sort of like to keep things, especially "official" things in good order. There were no stamps on pages nine, ten, or eleven of my passport. So, it would have annoyed me that this lazy man stamped this cachet on page 12 leaving three blank pages, that he stamped it between the columns, and that he stamped it at an apparently careless angle, had I not read The Master of Disguise. Now I know that the NY Kennedy Airport arrival stamp for that day was applied at an angle between the two columns in the top row on page 12.

If my Kennedy arrival cachet for that day was anywhere else, it would mark my passport as a less-than-perfect forgery.

Even such details as whether the stamp has square or rounded corners varies from day-to-day.

How would you know which stamp to use, square or round corners, or where to apply it and whether to put it on at an angle or straight? You'd either have to have access to the official records, or you'd have to know from some other means. And so the CIA is constantly collecting such seemingly insignificant details as where entry cachets are being stamped in every country on any given day so that if we do need to "exfiltrate" someone, the forged passport can be perfect.
 
I think Jason Bourne is a great fictional character, I put him in my top 3 along with Dwight Schrute and Cliff Clavin. :thumbup:
 
What about those movies where a bunch of hot chicks order pizzas, but don't have any money to pay for them? and then when the delivery guy arrives, they offer certain services in lieu of payment? I think Pizza Delivery Guy is the best job in the world, even better than CIA hitman (who lies in bed and stares at ceiling all day).

Good point. :thumbup:

Torz, that cracked me up!
 
Jason Bourne is a commie-pinko anti-American wan****, I mean whiner and Gollnick has been reading too many spy novels.
 
I am saying I'm ammused how the Bourne movies portray the CIA as having all these "assets" in every town just waiting to go out and shoot someone in a moments notice.

Its just ammusing... but thats what keeps us entertained, right?

steve
 
Anyone remember the true tale, think it was called the man who died twice.

The Brits in WWII were trying to provide false information to the Nazis so that they would think that there would be a southern landing.

A dead guy who had died of Pneumonia (battle to spell that word) soo it would be very similar to drowning,was dressed up as an important officer, placed in an aircraft liferaft off the Spanish Coast with a dossier. They made a whole life for this guy including old, torn opera tickets in his pocket....... The Germans fell hook line and sinker. What a huge amount of work and planning.

I believe that modern spooks do this in their sleep.
 
I think Jason Bourne is a great fictional character, I put him in my top 3 along with Dwight Schrute and Cliff Clavin. :thumbup:

When I first glanced your post, I was sure you'd written Cliff Stamp.
 
Its just ammusing... but thats what keeps us entertained, right?

steve

The thing that first annoyed me about the Bourne movies is that he would always go to great pains to disguise the woman, cutting hair and so forth, but he wouldn't lift a finger to disguise himself, not even change his own cloths or even put on a hat. He carries a bright red -- stand out like a sore thumb -- bank courier bag through the entire first movie. Jason, you are carrying millions of dollars in cash! Stop and buy yourself a bag that's a little more discreet! It's not like you can't afford it.

But, it was in the third movie that I understood. Jason Bourne does not need a disguise. He is invisible. No, it's not some supernatural super power. It's not magic. It's not some adaptive camouflage device that Q built into his wrist watch. No. He just knows how to not be seen.

This is epitomized in the third movie when he's directing the reporter through the crowd and past the opposition agents specifically looking for the reporter in the crowd. Bourne is directing the reporter by cell phone. Suddenly, Bourne instructs the reporter, "Tie your shoe! Now! Do it!" This instruction comes just as the opposition surveilance agents are about to look in the direction of the reporter. The reporter stoops down to tie his shoe and he just disappears into the crowd. For that moment, that reporter is invisible, not by some superpower but just by knowing when to tie his shoe. For Bourne, this whole routine is so practiced and so drilled -- a way of life -- that he does it almost instictively. He doesn't have to be told when to tie his shoe like the reporter did. He just ties it when it needs to be tied.

Jason Bourne could have walked through that mall naked carrying only the bright red bank bag and nobody would have noticed. He's that good.

But, is it possible for someone to actually be that good? Well, maybe not the naked part, but the rest, I think so.

In this respect, Bourne, not Batman, is the modern ninja master.
 
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