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- Oct 18, 2001
- Messages
- 20,978
I could use some sarcasm...
Dan
Dan
-
The BladeForums.com 2024 Traditional Knife is ready to order! See this thread for details: https://www.bladeforums.com/threads/bladeforums-2024-traditional-knife.2003187/
Price is$300$250 ea (shipped within CONUS). If you live outside the US, I will contact you after your order for extra shipping charges.
Order here: https://www.bladeforums.com/help/2024-traditional/ - Order as many as you like, we have plenty.
Anybody got a good joke for Today?
- Thread starter Daniel Koster
- Start date
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2001
- Messages
- 20,978
Found one:
- Joined
- Jun 19, 2006
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- 2,166
guy who never hunted walks into a bar-
ask's were the best hunting is-
old man at the bar says "be here tomorrow morning 6am sharp"
they hook up and go to the woods-
guy starts to unload a ton of stuff from his suv-the old guy says just take a gun,ill grab my dog
out of the back of the old mans beat up wagon a 100 year old ratty looking dog gingerly jumps out-guy asks the old man what kind of gun he is bringing-old man laughs and says "the dog is all i kneed"
they come to a tree with a squirrel ,guy goes to shoot it,old man says "you will destroy the meat let the dog do his job" he shakes the tree ,the squirrel falls out,the dog runs over and f@#%s it to death-
the come to another tree with a raccoon in it-again the guy wants to shoot it-old man says " dont shoot it you will destroy the pelt" shakes the tree ,it falls and the dog gets some more good lovin till it dies-
then awhile latter latter they come to a tree with a bear,guy wants to shoot it,old man says "lets see just how much the ole boy has left" and starts to shake the tree,bear digs in so he climbs up the tree and tries to get the bear loose,bear kicks him in the face and he falls- the guy asks can i shoot the bear now,old man replies "forget the dam bear shoot my friggin dog"
ask's were the best hunting is-
old man at the bar says "be here tomorrow morning 6am sharp"
they hook up and go to the woods-
guy starts to unload a ton of stuff from his suv-the old guy says just take a gun,ill grab my dog
out of the back of the old mans beat up wagon a 100 year old ratty looking dog gingerly jumps out-guy asks the old man what kind of gun he is bringing-old man laughs and says "the dog is all i kneed"
they come to a tree with a squirrel ,guy goes to shoot it,old man says "you will destroy the meat let the dog do his job" he shakes the tree ,the squirrel falls out,the dog runs over and f@#%s it to death-
the come to another tree with a raccoon in it-again the guy wants to shoot it-old man says " dont shoot it you will destroy the pelt" shakes the tree ,it falls and the dog gets some more good lovin till it dies-
then awhile latter latter they come to a tree with a bear,guy wants to shoot it,old man says "lets see just how much the ole boy has left" and starts to shake the tree,bear digs in so he climbs up the tree and tries to get the bear loose,bear kicks him in the face and he falls- the guy asks can i shoot the bear now,old man replies "forget the dam bear shoot my friggin dog"
- Joined
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On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.
The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"
"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."
After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if there's no one there I know?"
The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"
"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."
After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if there's no one there I know?"
desmobob
Basic Member
- Joined
- May 5, 2003
- Messages
- 2,493
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman were
sittin' in a New York
corner
bar reminiscing about the "Old Country."
“Y'know" said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs
back home. In
Glasgow
there's a little bar called McTavish's. Now the
landlord there goes
out of
his way for the locals so much that when you buy four
drinks he will
buy the
fifth drink for you."
"Well," said the Englishman, "at my local, The Red
Lion, the barman
there will
buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."
"Ahhhhh, that's nothing," said the Irishman.
"Back home in Dublin th ere's Ryan's Bar. Now the
moment you se t foot
in the
place they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the
drinks you like.
Then
when you've had enough drinks they'll take you
upstairs and see that
you get
laid. All on the house."
The Englishman and Scotsman immediately scorn the
Irishman's claims.
But he swears every word is true.
"Well," asked the Englishman, "did this actually
happen to you?"
"Not me meself, personally, no," said the Irishman.
"But it did happen to me sister."
Stay sharp,
desmobob
sittin' in a New York
corner
bar reminiscing about the "Old Country."
“Y'know" said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs
back home. In
Glasgow
there's a little bar called McTavish's. Now the
landlord there goes
out of
his way for the locals so much that when you buy four
drinks he will
buy the
fifth drink for you."
"Well," said the Englishman, "at my local, The Red
Lion, the barman
there will
buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."
"Ahhhhh, that's nothing," said the Irishman.
"Back home in Dublin th ere's Ryan's Bar. Now the
moment you se t foot
in the
place they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the
drinks you like.
Then
when you've had enough drinks they'll take you
upstairs and see that
you get
laid. All on the house."
The Englishman and Scotsman immediately scorn the
Irishman's claims.
But he swears every word is true.
"Well," asked the Englishman, "did this actually
happen to you?"
"Not me meself, personally, no," said the Irishman.
"But it did happen to me sister."
Stay sharp,
desmobob