- Joined
- Oct 7, 1998
- Messages
- 1,838
Since no one else has posted this thread, I suppose I must do so. Mike; please note the knife content in my Valentine, so leave the thread here, OK?
First, here is one for Rich Lucibella, Donna, DC, Anthony Lombardo, and all the other Italians and/or Sicilians, or just people who like garlic:
___________________
The Top 15 Mafia Valentine's Day Greetings
15. My love for you...
it came and went.
So your feet are now
in wet cement.
14. I'm here to fulfill
your fondest wishes-
Now that your husband
sleeps with the fishes.
13. Lie down with me-
It's my final offa,
Or you'll be lying
wit' Jimmy Hoffa.
12. I picked up this card
from a slim selection,
But that's all they offer
in witness protection.
Love, J.. Doe
11. I've waited so long for you to be mine!
Now that Sinatra's dead, be *my* Valentine.
10. Be my Valentine... and we can do it execution-style.
9. Cinderella got her fella,
with a slipper made of glass.
So please be mine, Valentine,
or I'll have to whack your ass.
8. Violets are blue, roses are red.
I blew up your car-So why ain't you dead?
7. The day we met, my little pet,
I knew with just one look,
You'd bear a son, and now that's done,
So shut your mouth and cook!
6. Hey, how you doin'?
5. Youse da greatest.
Youse da best.
But you're untouchable
Like Elliot Ness.
4. Lust is fleeting,
True love lingers.
Be mine always
And you'll keep your fingers.
3. Hope da chocolates is good, but y'know,
dis ain't really what a guy's heart looks like.
2. Valentine, Dear, lend me a hand,
So I won't be a self-made man.
and the Number 1 Mafia Valentine's Day Greeting...
1. When a goon makes you die,
cuz you told him goodbye
-- that's amore!
__________________
And here (blush) is my Valentine's Day Greeting to my beloved, DC:
I visited you, way down on your farm,
Where the weather was wet, and not very warm.
I thought I could scratch your innermost itch,
So brought you a knife made by Rob Simonich.
It was made of Damascus, thats right, real Wootz
And I gave Don Vito a bunch of kids books.
You greeted me with a most wonderful hug,
But I guess I didnt bring a big enough bug.
Cuz here I am, in a hole in the ground,
Next to a nursery tree, in a pot, black and round.
I had thought that I was really doing quite fine,
But now you are shoveling in the quicklime.
I guess now we wont make it to the altar,
But I do wish youd stop calling the tree Walter
Ah, but DC, you love me, I know that you do,
For after all, love, youre keeping me close to you!
All my love, cara mia, Walt (from somewhere deep in an abandoned missle silo)
[This message has been edited by Walt Welch (edited 02-13-2000).]
First, here is one for Rich Lucibella, Donna, DC, Anthony Lombardo, and all the other Italians and/or Sicilians, or just people who like garlic:
___________________
The Top 15 Mafia Valentine's Day Greetings
15. My love for you...
it came and went.
So your feet are now
in wet cement.
14. I'm here to fulfill
your fondest wishes-
Now that your husband
sleeps with the fishes.
13. Lie down with me-
It's my final offa,
Or you'll be lying
wit' Jimmy Hoffa.
12. I picked up this card
from a slim selection,
But that's all they offer
in witness protection.
Love, J.. Doe
11. I've waited so long for you to be mine!
Now that Sinatra's dead, be *my* Valentine.
10. Be my Valentine... and we can do it execution-style.
9. Cinderella got her fella,
with a slipper made of glass.
So please be mine, Valentine,
or I'll have to whack your ass.
8. Violets are blue, roses are red.
I blew up your car-So why ain't you dead?
7. The day we met, my little pet,
I knew with just one look,
You'd bear a son, and now that's done,
So shut your mouth and cook!
6. Hey, how you doin'?
5. Youse da greatest.
Youse da best.
But you're untouchable
Like Elliot Ness.
4. Lust is fleeting,
True love lingers.
Be mine always
And you'll keep your fingers.
3. Hope da chocolates is good, but y'know,
dis ain't really what a guy's heart looks like.
2. Valentine, Dear, lend me a hand,
So I won't be a self-made man.
and the Number 1 Mafia Valentine's Day Greeting...
1. When a goon makes you die,
cuz you told him goodbye
-- that's amore!
__________________
And here (blush) is my Valentine's Day Greeting to my beloved, DC:
I visited you, way down on your farm,
Where the weather was wet, and not very warm.
I thought I could scratch your innermost itch,
So brought you a knife made by Rob Simonich.
It was made of Damascus, thats right, real Wootz
And I gave Don Vito a bunch of kids books.
You greeted me with a most wonderful hug,
But I guess I didnt bring a big enough bug.
Cuz here I am, in a hole in the ground,
Next to a nursery tree, in a pot, black and round.
I had thought that I was really doing quite fine,
But now you are shoveling in the quicklime.
I guess now we wont make it to the altar,
But I do wish youd stop calling the tree Walter
Ah, but DC, you love me, I know that you do,
For after all, love, youre keeping me close to you!
All my love, cara mia, Walt (from somewhere deep in an abandoned missle silo)
[This message has been edited by Walt Welch (edited 02-13-2000).]
