Yowza, a Bowie knife accident. A term sure to bring chills to any knife lover along with visions of severed limbs and wincing images of pierced feet.
Yup Ive had one, but don't worry I'm all right. Mostly.
Its been a beautiful spring and a couple of weeks ago I went for a short walk at work, ended up in a little junk shop where they had a bunch of Pakistani made knives. There were a small pile of copies of the Western Bowie, five bucks each. Truly crappy with an edge like the back of a butter knife but proportionately accurate. Ive had a Western Bowie since I was 9 so it appealed to me in the same way a hot rod Nova does an old racer.
So I bought the thing and took it home to sharpen on the boat anchor harbor freight. Took about 15 minutes to put on a wicked convex edge with a pretty rough edge on it. Then I spent a while whacking some bamboo and two by fours and declared I'm going to beat hell out of this knife. Then threw it in the pack to take camping.
A little over a week ago we went kid camping at Nehalem Bay. No real need or use for the PAki Bowie but I took it anyway. Saturday night after a few beers Im playing with it and took serious umbrage at the flexi gaurd it had. Thats as likely to cut you as be useful I said and bent it downward with my index finger. And now comes the moment of idiocy....I reached up with my left hand and bent it slightly the other way and it snapped right off laying my index finger abruptly and with force along the nasty edge. It cut between first and second knuckle roughly halfway around my finger almost completely to the bone!
I looked down into the mouth of flesh and had that sinking Wow thats really going to hurt feeling where you feel all pasty and green. Then I pitched the blade into the dirt and asked my friend "Hey you got those bandaids I gave you?" as blood began to gush out of my finger like a Monty Python skit.
Just before we left he had asked me to get him some surgical tape. The two small bandaids I gave him were all we had and as necessary as air.
I Know, I'm looking into a better medical kit for my camping trips already.
We ran over to the car and I smoothed the loose flesh back together. I put one over the hump of torn flesh and the other along the far side to hold it together and apply pressure then sit back down to finish turning green, and my beer.
OK my friend says,"Its 9:00pm the closest emergency room is Tillamook we better get going" But I'm resolute, "Nah its just a scratch" in my best Black Knight impression. It'll be fine"
Oddly I'm pretty OK about hacking myself with a Bowie knife but kind of a wuss about medical procedures and stitches...Not that they don't have there place at times.
So Im sitting there wondering whether I really should go get some silk and whether the wound will get horribly infected over the weekend and whether the Pakistani's temper in urine or anything like that and whether MR Rumsfeld shouldn't look into bombing those folks for suspicion of WMD and whatnot. Feeling philosophical and all and the kids come out of the tent to see whats up.
"Whoa what happened!" They ask, nosy little buggers.
Me all gory and taped up, holding my hand gingerly above my head and lookin greener than Kermit thee frog.
"Oh I sliced myself up pretty bad."
"How did you do that?" asks my kid who's a budding knife guy and respects the hell out of me, I was trying to explain irony to him earlier but couldn't find a good enough example to demonstrate to him.
Well I did a dumb ass thing and hurt myself pretty bad.
"So what can you learn from this?" I asked him. "What can HE Learn from this!" my friend interjected. "Sure" I said, "if you can't learn from someone elses pain you may have to do it yourself. And Justin is one to make lots of hard mistakes in life."
"Um, not to cut yourself with a Bowie knife?"
"Sure!", I said somewhat blearily sagely "but also, Even if you are familiar with something you have to remember to treat it with respect. Also its ironic that Ive had a Bowie knife like this since I was nine but it took me till I was an adult to seriously hurt myself with one in spite of everyones worst fears."
"By the way don't tell your Mom about this, it'll be our little secret."
My wound made it through the weekend and Justin somehow didn't tell his mom right away. For the first three days it was touch and go. I changed the bandaids daily and varied pressure and direction to help the wound close up. Looked like a frogs mouth for a couple of days, then it began to heal. Now I can feel my finger past the cut and the swelling has gone down enough to see its going to be all right. Still get cold flashes if I bump it and it itches but Im pretty sure its going to stay on.
So let that be a lesson to you, even a cheap knife or especially a cheap knife can still hurt you.
Yup Ive had one, but don't worry I'm all right. Mostly.
Its been a beautiful spring and a couple of weeks ago I went for a short walk at work, ended up in a little junk shop where they had a bunch of Pakistani made knives. There were a small pile of copies of the Western Bowie, five bucks each. Truly crappy with an edge like the back of a butter knife but proportionately accurate. Ive had a Western Bowie since I was 9 so it appealed to me in the same way a hot rod Nova does an old racer.
So I bought the thing and took it home to sharpen on the boat anchor harbor freight. Took about 15 minutes to put on a wicked convex edge with a pretty rough edge on it. Then I spent a while whacking some bamboo and two by fours and declared I'm going to beat hell out of this knife. Then threw it in the pack to take camping.
A little over a week ago we went kid camping at Nehalem Bay. No real need or use for the PAki Bowie but I took it anyway. Saturday night after a few beers Im playing with it and took serious umbrage at the flexi gaurd it had. Thats as likely to cut you as be useful I said and bent it downward with my index finger. And now comes the moment of idiocy....I reached up with my left hand and bent it slightly the other way and it snapped right off laying my index finger abruptly and with force along the nasty edge. It cut between first and second knuckle roughly halfway around my finger almost completely to the bone!
I looked down into the mouth of flesh and had that sinking Wow thats really going to hurt feeling where you feel all pasty and green. Then I pitched the blade into the dirt and asked my friend "Hey you got those bandaids I gave you?" as blood began to gush out of my finger like a Monty Python skit.
Just before we left he had asked me to get him some surgical tape. The two small bandaids I gave him were all we had and as necessary as air.
I Know, I'm looking into a better medical kit for my camping trips already.
We ran over to the car and I smoothed the loose flesh back together. I put one over the hump of torn flesh and the other along the far side to hold it together and apply pressure then sit back down to finish turning green, and my beer.
OK my friend says,"Its 9:00pm the closest emergency room is Tillamook we better get going" But I'm resolute, "Nah its just a scratch" in my best Black Knight impression. It'll be fine"
Oddly I'm pretty OK about hacking myself with a Bowie knife but kind of a wuss about medical procedures and stitches...Not that they don't have there place at times.
So Im sitting there wondering whether I really should go get some silk and whether the wound will get horribly infected over the weekend and whether the Pakistani's temper in urine or anything like that and whether MR Rumsfeld shouldn't look into bombing those folks for suspicion of WMD and whatnot. Feeling philosophical and all and the kids come out of the tent to see whats up.
"Whoa what happened!" They ask, nosy little buggers.
Me all gory and taped up, holding my hand gingerly above my head and lookin greener than Kermit thee frog.
"Oh I sliced myself up pretty bad."
"How did you do that?" asks my kid who's a budding knife guy and respects the hell out of me, I was trying to explain irony to him earlier but couldn't find a good enough example to demonstrate to him.
Well I did a dumb ass thing and hurt myself pretty bad.
"So what can you learn from this?" I asked him. "What can HE Learn from this!" my friend interjected. "Sure" I said, "if you can't learn from someone elses pain you may have to do it yourself. And Justin is one to make lots of hard mistakes in life."
"Um, not to cut yourself with a Bowie knife?"
"Sure!", I said somewhat blearily sagely "but also, Even if you are familiar with something you have to remember to treat it with respect. Also its ironic that Ive had a Bowie knife like this since I was nine but it took me till I was an adult to seriously hurt myself with one in spite of everyones worst fears."
"By the way don't tell your Mom about this, it'll be our little secret."
My wound made it through the weekend and Justin somehow didn't tell his mom right away. For the first three days it was touch and go. I changed the bandaids daily and varied pressure and direction to help the wound close up. Looked like a frogs mouth for a couple of days, then it began to heal. Now I can feel my finger past the cut and the swelling has gone down enough to see its going to be all right. Still get cold flashes if I bump it and it itches but Im pretty sure its going to stay on.
So let that be a lesson to you, even a cheap knife or especially a cheap knife can still hurt you.
