Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I
look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of
their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of
work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, "It is better to drink
this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about
my liver.
Babe Ruth
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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning,
that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
Lyndon B. Johnson
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When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
George Bernard Shaw
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Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin
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This is the best one!
The "Buffalo Theory"
A herd of buffalo can only
move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is
the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural
selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and
health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the
weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine!
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
).
