Cold call spammers

Gary W. Graley

Gary W. Graley

“Imagination is more important than knowledge"
Knifemaker / Craftsman / Service Provider
Joined
Mar 2, 1999
Messages
27,501
Don't you just love the folks that call you, with Great news for you? :)

I got a call at work yesterday, it went something like this;

Ring, ring..."hello?"

Hello Mr Graley?

"Yes!" in my excited voice...

I am calling to just let you know that you will receive a $7,500 grant check...

I cut in "WOW, I can't thank you enough!"

Silence

then she says Don't you want to know why we are giving you this grant money?

I reply, again with an overzealous and a bit excited voice "Not in the least!
I am just so very happy that I am getting this check, you have
NO idea how much I need that money right now, this is simply AMAZING
that you called at such a time that....

suddenly the phone call ends in midsentence as she hangs up on me, yeah,
I'm a little stinker eh?

Don't ya just love 'em ?

G2
 
You got a call from an actual person!? You ARE special! All I ever get are recordings. :grumpy:
 
Yes, I am special, I get a LOT of the recordings as well, sometimes
I'll press the 1 and chat with them and ask them to remove my name
and phone number and surprisingly, they are put off that I didn't press
the # 2 as instructed, lol, I took up THEIR valuable time I guess ;)

So yes, a real call was a bit of a treat, but it was short lived...
G2

hmm both responses were from people from Kansas, that is curious :)
 
My favorite Paul Harvey bumper snicker was one that read: "Welcome to Kansas! Please set your watch back fifty years."

Telephones are too new here for the novelty to have worn off. ;) :D
 
When I got solicitation calls at work, I'd act confused, let them go through their little speel for a while, ask them to repeat everything at least twice, then after a couple of minutes, I'd say, "This isn't Pizza Hut? Aww, jeez, I dialed the wrong number. Sorry about that." Then I'd hang up. They usually didn't call me back. :D

thx - cpr
 
Good one cpr :) I'm sure they just love it too ;)

About the funniest one I did was when a poor lady, with good intentions I'm sure,
called from Sears Hearing Center. Again later in the evening, a call comes to my
house, funny how they get that number too?
She starts in, quite serious that they are offering a hearing test, to which I
replied "Oh that's quite alright, we get all of our glasses from Empire Vision, they
are very good and no complaints"
She stutters and says "No! we do H-e-a-r-i-n-g tests..."
I reply "Yes, they are near to us, it's very convenient for us, but I do appreciate
your concern, but our eye glass needs are no problem.

She starts in again, probably thinking MY WORD THESE PEOPLE REALLY NEED A HEARING TEST!
"Sir, no it is a Hearing test we provide, not eye glasses"
By that time I was winding down and just said thanks again and hung up on her.

All the time being very cooperative but obviously I didn't understand what a generous
thing they were trying to do for me ;) I don't know why, I guess I was just inspired when
she started in to take it to a different type of call and you know, they've never called back ! :)

I've heard of people asking callers to please hold and just set the phone down and walk
away to watch tv or such, but I hate tying up the phone for that length of time, but I
can see how that could help have them not call again.

My wife takes a different tack, she's not the humourous person that I tend to be and just
point blank tells them that we are on the DO NOT CALL listing and says she will report their call and hangs up.
She's funny that way...:)

G2
 
I have dumped land lines as the call ins for freebies (very condidional) were irritating and from semi literates.

I hate the canned music on any company's call in system. Some have made an effort to change to a little better. One morning I swapped out our office system's background music for "The Wall". Went quite well until the CEO called in from South Africa.
 
I get the "renew your car warranty" calls. I tell them that my vehicle is a Nissan and it does not need a warranty because it was built well and I know how to turn a wrench. Then I let the awkward silence set in. I let them finally say, "ok sir, have a nice day." I respond with a "thank you, you do the same. Always remember to check your fluids and your tire pressure." I get a wierd sense of satisfaction from that.
 
Okay - had a bit of a situation today, so I'm too agitated to sleep. I'm bored. Here's some more. (Sorry - don't mean to hijack a thread.)

cj65 said:
I get the "renew your car warranty" calls. I tell them that my vehicle is a Nissan and it does not need a warranty because it was built well and I know how to turn a wrench. Then I let the awkward silence set in. I let them finally say, "ok sir, have a nice day." I respond with a "thank you, you do the same. Always remember to check your fluids and your tire pressure." I get a wierd sense of satisfaction from that.
Click to expand...

I predict these stories will never end.

One night, having dinner at home with friends, we get the warranty call. I decided I was tired of the harassment, and here's what I did when I pushed '1' to talk to someone.

The lady comes on the phone, and before she could say anything, I started in: "Wail, whin I gets off'n p'obashun, mah p'role of'cer says I kin drive me a car agin. I got a sweet ol' Cordoba out back o' tha barn, on blocks - when I kin drive agin will ya'll fix it fer me? I needs rims & tars. An' paintin'. Might need a moter, too. I'll be good now, 'cause I don't want no third strike, so I'll drive real nice. Say . . . you soun' real purty . . . wanna go out?" Everyone laughed until that last part, then my wife kicked me under the table, hard. Bruised shin for over a week; but those warranty pests never called back. :p :thumbup:

A roommate of mine would wait until the salespeople got on the phone, he'd interrupt with something like, "Is this the clinic?! Where's my penicillin?! I'm oozing again, bad! Without my penicillin I can't control it! It Hurts! I need my penicillin!" That was about as far as he'd get before they'd hang up.

Here's a link to a Tom Mabe joke. Really hilarious.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=un_PjRXV5l8

thx - cpr
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top