Death of a Family Friend

[Point44]

I don't know whether this belongs in whine and cheese or here but i just got to get this out of me.

It's been a tough day. My aunty planned to come by today to see my baby girl for the first time, so today was supposed to be a happy day. But today i received a call that an old family friend passed away. I first met her when i was 7 years old (i'm 26 as of 4 days ago). The first time ever i came to the UK for a vacation to visit my grandad i met this lady and her husband. I'm not sure how we got to know them but we started visiting her even after her husband passed away. In the end we got quite close and i treat her kinda like my own grandma. Her son passed away a few years back and her grandson lives in Canada so me and my wife make it a point to visit her and check up on her since she is 84 years old. My wife got to know her only when she met me but she has grown quite close to her as well. This lady has loads of Malaysian friends 'cos friends and family who come to the UK visit her. SO much so that in 1998 (i think) when she came to Malaysia for the first time (and the last) it was featured in the Malaysian newspapers.

Anyway, we planned to go see her after my wife was well enough to travel so she could see the little baby. So when we got the news today it was a big blow for us. I got the call right after my aunt called up saying she was 15 minutes away from our house. When she arrived i had to break the news to her and all of us could barely eat lunch. My aunty was kind of freaked out 'cos she already bought some christmas presents from Malaysia for the lady and she was just at the highway rest stop looking for a card.

For me i was kind of regretting not sending her pictures of the baby sooner but it has only been 5 days since the birth. But my wife kind of broke down today. If not for the midwife who came at the moment i told my wife the news she would still be on the floor crying. What made it worse for my wife was that earlier in the morning she had received the news that her friend in Malaysia who had an accident a few days ago and has been in a coma since, died.

It's just a sucky day and i just needed to get it all out. It's even worse for my wife to have news of 2 deaths in a day. My dad has even told me to take extra care so my wife doesn't go into post natal depression.

On the plus side the baby is still doing well and we have good memories of those who left us and i will be sure to tell those stories to my little girl.

 

[Esav Benyamin]

That's why your daughter is so important. We won't be here much longer. Someone has to fill in for us.

Raise her in memory of people you loved who are gone, and she'll do fine.

 

[Lost Jaguar]

I hope that time lessens the grief, leaving happy memories instead. Look your little girl in the eyes and see the future. Maybe your friend lives on a little in your daughter. It's important, I believe, to embrace the grief, let it out, and march on. Find a favorite picture of her, frame it, and put it in a place you'll often pass. Reflect on your good fortune for knowing her. Good luck. You'll be in my thoughts.

 

[FullerH]

As your daughter grows up, be sure to tell her about this woderful friend. We tend to move on too quickly today and to forget these old family ties, even if they aren't blood ties. They are very real and very important, something of which I haven't been able to convince my son and his wife and I am so afraid that a time will come when I am not around to be their central record center and they will want the information and it will be lost.

 

[cockroachfarm]

That's why your daughter is so important. We won't be here much longer. Someone has to fill in for us.

Raise her in memory of people you loved who are gone, and she'll do fine.

His words. My thoughts.

Good luck.