- Joined
- May 2, 2004
- Messages
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I can see there is a thirst for humor, here. So, I'm going to tell you the story of the Deer Santa butchering.
We had this deer down and we were ready to empty her guts. The head was uphill and there was a nice slope, to assist with getting the intestines out in one piece. I held the front legs and Jeff got to work with the knife. He had her cut up to the ribcage, when I asked him if he knew how to make a Deer Santa?
He said he didn't, but figured he could learn.
I proceeded to explain that a successful Deer Santa could be had by first cutting around the rump of the animal, up one leg across the back and down the other leg. Pull this hide up in a gather, with the anus being the only attachment to the deer. The idea is to cut around the anus in a fashion, so as to not loose the "pucker." You have to be able to tie the rectal tube with a leather thong on the inside.
When that's tied off, cut her loose and put the tail, with anus attached, aside.
Jeff is listening to all this; and trying to get the guts out of this deer.
A picture of the Deer Santa is starting to form in Jeff's mind, I can tell cause hes starting to chuckle.
Jeff and I have been friends for years. He knows me well.
Let me back up a little. So you can see what Jeff saw:
Once you get the anus tied off from the inside, its time to do a little carpentry work.
Get yourself a pine board about a foot square and paint a pair of big jolly eyes on it and a red round nose under the eyes. Trim the edges to head shape.
Take that deer hide and flip the tail down exposing that puckered hole and turning the deers tail into Santa's, long, white, full, beard.
A little knife work to form the cheeks under the eyes and you are just about there. Use your tack hammer or staple gun to attach the hide to the wooden head. If you favor puffy cheeks on your Santa; Stick a little tissue in them to make them puff out.
The last thing to add, is his hat and a little cigar in his "mouth".:thumbup:
About this time in the tail/tale, Jeff was laughing so hard, the gut pile ended up on his shoes and he landed on top of the pile.
He was still laughing.
Jeff was a good sport and still has his Deer Santa hanging on the wall of there deer hunting cabin.
If they have new people in camp; they explain to them, the tradition of removing the cigar from Santas mouth and giving him a kiss on those old
wrinkled lips so their dreams will come true.
Its amazing what people will do when they get a little alcohol in them.
Fred
