Fortune cookie fortunes

fast14riot

fast14riot

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Oct 27, 2010
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I had a pleasant lunch with my mother yesterday at a delicious fine chinese restaurant, and of course at the end of the meal they brought fortune cookies.

Every so often I get one that I just have to keep, so I stick it in my wallet. The one I got yesterday I thought was a good saying..."Fear is just excitement in need of an attitude adjustment." I think it is correct.

So, aside from the silly games of adding "in bed" or the like to the end of the fortune, what good, funny, or provacative fortunes have you got? It can be one you made up and think should be in a cookie, but please keep it PG rated.


-Xander
 
One night after dinner my kids were reading their fortunes. I pretended to read from mine "Don't believe anything you read from a fortune cookie."

Ric
 
Mine said, "Help! I'm being held prisoner in a fortune cookie factory!"

The only fortunes that I saved were from a Chinese restaurant in Banff. I had to laugh because they were in English on one side and French on the other.* I think that I know where they are.
If I find them, I'll post pictures.


*I have not seen fortunes in Spanish.........yet.
 
Here's a few I came up with..
"Lots of things taste like chicken"
"Have you seen my cat?"
"Later, you will have horrible gas"
"Cats may have nine lives, but only keep for six or seven days"
"You will be hungry in two hours"
 
One of the funny things my dad came up with while we were at a Chinese restaurant:

Q: Do you know why they serve hot tea at Chinese restaurants?

A: To wash the grease down.
 
Some good ones guys! Funny, I used to wonder why you don't see many over weight chinese people. Then I tried to eat with chop sticks...*


*yes, I can eat efficiently with chop sticks.

-Xander
 
Here's the fortunes in English and French or French and English if you're in Quebec. ;)
 
2534411001_687122a7de.jpg
 
I used to keep some. Usually the ones that make me laugh out loud when adding "in bed" to the end.

I got into the habit of trying to make a woman's measurements out of the "loto" numbers on the back/bottom. Sometimes it gives you some good measurements: 35, 25, 36 Other times, you just gotta laugh: 39, 36, 51

Just one more thing to help them be a little more interesting.;)
 
One time I got a fortune that said "you need to buy a new suit". I guess that was a fortune, but I'm not sure what it all meant.
 
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