get alimony dismissed in CA courts.

cj65

cj65

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Aug 30, 2008
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I just wanted to share some pointers of my experience in California Family Court today (San Bernardino County).
I was married for 9 yrs. and one month to a now chronic meth head wife. I had alimony dismissed today (huge win for me) because she violated a CLETS order (restraining order) I had filed against her. Since she was convicted on violating the order, (in accordance with CA family law) I no longer have to pay alimony :D. Domestic violence is taken seriously in CA (alot to do with the OJ Simpson trial), and the prosecuting atty convicted my ex. because of her verbal threats on me and my then girlfriend/family now wife and stepchildren on my voice mail.:cool:

A great home tip that worked for me.....Keep your important court documents in the freezer in a zip lock bag, you need them right away to present to the police if you want to obtain a conviction for a spouse behaving badly right there, right now. The police cannot really act on much unless you have signed court documents showing how the ex is in violation. I could never find those freakin papers:o when I needed them-but since I put them in the freezer, I have no problem finding them. ;) It also makes the police officers chuckle.

Unexpectedly my ex claimed that I had not payed her any alimony at all this year, even though I had.... :confused: Luckily my lawyer had records of the payments via cancelled check copies, front and back (need to have the back side too!) This is my main point- Pay alimony with checks, so they can be printed and used as proof of payment. She was caught in a blatant lie. This really pissed off the judge.:thumbup: If I was not able to provide that proof, I would have been stuck with double alimony. :eek:

Just one more FYI- As a guideline- marriage under 10 yrs. will award spousal support for half the length of the marriage. The judge can do what he/she wants, but that is a rule of thumb. If you are married for over 10 yrs, alimony could be till death, or re-marriage of the ex spouse.

I had been through hell for the last 3 yrs. but today was quite sweet, almost as sweet as the day I obtained custody of my boys....
Cheers and Happy New Years Gents!
CJ
 
Good for you!!! Nice to see the man coming up trumps for a change. :thumbup:

The laws vary by state, as where I live alimony is not automatically granted and depends upon whether the wife was working at the time of (and especially during) your marriage, as well as her occupation and income potential. If her income potential is greater (i.e. she has a degree and you don't) then she is not entitled to claim it.

Personally, I don't think any man should have to fork over cash to an ex- period. If she had a job and could take care of herself before the marriage then she can do so afterward, and if she cannot stand on her own two feet then she shouldn't be artificially propped up at the expense of someone who is self-reliant. Screw it, let her fall flat on her face - even if it means living out of a cardboard box in the alley. Natural selection, and all that jazz. Besides, unless she's grossly obese or butt ugly she's got assets and there's always a street corner handy to advertise them.
 
I agree with equal rights and all, the problem was that she was not working for most of our marriage, not that she could'nt, she just didn't. If she was a money earner, I would not have been so worried. The worst part financially is that I do not recieve child support from her, but had to pay her alimony. Ventura Co. Child support has taken about 1.5 yrs. to get things to the default status as of right now. She should be getting her wages garnished in about a month or two. I have no problem taking it either. She had me by the juevos, but she let go to grab a crack pipe. Now I can raise my kids in a good environment, free of riff raff. They have seen way too much for 11 yr. old boys.
Thanks,
CJ
 
cj65 said:
I agree with equal rights and all, the problem was that she was not working for most of our marriage, not that she could'nt, she just didn't. If she was a money earner, I would not have been so worried.
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This is why I'll never understand men who are eager for thier wives to be stay at home moms....they're just setting themselves up for disaster - alimony and child support. They might as well pick out a shopping cart and decide which park bench they want to lay claim to, because they're not going to be able to afford to live anywhere else.

She should be getting her wages garnished in about a month or two. I have no problem taking it either.
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Of course you shouldn't! Hell, if it were the other way around she and her attorney would be eagerly bending you over the judicial bench and stretching your sore colon for every dime in child support they could get. Worse yet, you'd have to watch (and listen) to her gloating over it and reminding you of the penalties for not paying. I love to hear stories like yours, as I know it burns women's backsides to no end to have the tables turned and have to pay (gasp!) a man child support. Oh, the humanity! The injustice! Gloria Steinem must be kicking her cat right about now. Bwahahahahaha....stick it to her my brother, stick it to her! WOO HOO!! :D
 
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I am glad that justice IS served!! I am really sorry that you were married to drug addict, and that your kids had to see that. I will pray for you and your kids! I also celebrate your win. I am glad that YOU have the kids. Go bless you.
 
Thanks TKC, my faith in God just grew stronger, even through the darkest parts. I want to help any fathers who are being run down in the system.
God Bless You as well.
CJ
 
Over on militaryphotos.net there was a post bout the Canadian judicial system. Despite presenting to the court that the twins were not his offsprings he still had to pay child support.... Made me scratch my head a little.
 
Great job! Also keep evidence of all child support ("cs") payments for life, and $ spent on kids; in GA, the latter dosent count towards cs, usually, but it makes you look good to the judge. Also keep a log of visits (& denied visits), conversations w/ ex and kids.
 
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