Happy belated 4th
The wife, daughter, and I walked the leisurely 1 mile walk (lil one rode in her wagon) down to the festivities on Friday night. Fireworks at 9pm, so we posted up at a nice vantage point right on the street corner around 8:15 to wait. 9pm rolls around, no fireworks. 9:10, 9:15, 9:20...nothin. A nice wind starts to come up from the riverfront. I see people looking at their phones as they pack their fold up chairs with them and start walking quickly (yet quietly) through the crowds.
9:25, a police officer keys his mic once and immediately begins talking. We have no idea what he is saying. I see a guy talking to the folks behind him giving them a weather report on his 5" screen.
9:27 Fat drop of water. 9:27:30 The Heavens open up in biblical fashion and flood the throngs of people. Panic as old folks shuffle to try to find a any over hang to get under, parents begin pushing flooded strollers containing soggy kids and about 6.7 gallons of water. Teenagers dart and scream and laugh with reckless abandon.
The make up hits my wife's eyes. She's blinded by it combined with the sheets or rain. My poor little 4 year old whimpers about how she is wet and doesn't want to be wet anymore. My boots are filled, my jeans plastered to my leg, my festive Hawaiian clung to my arms and shoulders limiting my movements.
Out came the mini mag on my belt so that we could navigate the flooded 200 year old streets and speeding cars for the long drenched trudge home. Thankfully my brand new phone (literally just got it that day) was saved by the Otter Box around it. I did have to clean and oil my multi-tool, Case knife, and pocket .380 when I got back in the house

Like my wife told my daughter...it'll be a memory to share
The actual 4th was actually a lot of fun. Hung out at my dad and stepmom's. Good food, beer, margaritas, and some swimming. My 4 year old is old enough to do the whole sparkler thing with supervision, so she and I are lighting some off together. They are the bamboo kind, so they don't turn into molten wire like the old kind. However, she knows the rules. As soon as the sparkler goes out, she is to pass it to me so that I can put it on the ground and stamp it out with my shoe.
Between my dad and I, we bought like 63,489 of these sparklers, so by the time we are on the 58,423th one, I start to get tired of it and am lighting them fast and furious to get through them. In my daughter's excitement, she passes a sparkler that ALMOST out to me with a quick jerking stab. The top part of the glowing stick snaps off about 3" from the top and falls.
...into the top of my sport sandal. It finds its way to the really super soft spot between the ball of my ankle and heel. It literally smokes and I can smell my foot flesh cooking. I jump up like Yosemite Sam after getting the ol' Hot Foot from Bug's Bunny. I'm stomping out my foot and only driving the glowing stick in deeper until if mercifully goes out (even if it is now fused to my FOOT)
My dad rushed to my aid with a look of absolute concern and resolve to help his son...Just kidding, he's over in his lawn chair doubled over laughing so hard he can barely breathe. My 14 year old brother DOES come to my aid (the saint) and starts looking for my beer to douse the wound. I'm guessing he thought that the 6% alcohol would cleanse it. I thank him and decide that it would do a much better job medicating the burn from the inside out.
Sooo, I am sitting her and work today nursing a limp and a mild headcold that I may have picked up from walking through a toad strangler the night before. Actually, it really was a kinda fun holiday
