I'm a Millionaire

[Stacy E. Apelt - Bladesmith]

I just received an email telling me I was the Chevron Texaco promotional sweepstakes winner for 1,000,000 pounds.
Naturally, I thought it was a scam, so I sent back an email telling them to send the certified check to me at the store address and if they needed more info, they could call me at the store. In less than five minutes I received a phone call from Chevron. Never mind that the person barely spoke English and had a strong lower European/Balkan accent. I am sure Chevron is an equal opportunity employer, and hires many different nationalities. I was not to be fooled, though. I asked what company he represented, and he said, "Ceevroon" - close enough for me. I then asked where he was calling from, he said, "OOOHtaah". Well that cinched it. It stands to reason that a big oil company would have the corporate headquarters out west.
I gave the guy my bank account number ( He explained that a wire transfer was far safer than mailing a 1,000,000 pound check), full name and address ( to mail the confirmation papers), and my DOB and SSN ( they needed it for the IRS, but hey, I'm willing to pay the taxes). We decided that my mothers maiden name would be a good password. I should have the money in my account by Monday.
WOO-HOO, I'm rich!

 

[powernoodle]

Texaco's sweepstakes department is headquartered in the former Yugoslavia. Everyone know that. Congrats on your prize.

 

[tryppyr]

Tell us, Stacy, what's the first thing you will buy with your newfound wealth? A second shop in Oootah? A really big power hammer? Maybe some stock on Ceevroon?

 

[J Haning]

You should have flown to OOOOhtah and asked them to pre-pay for your teeeckit. Deduct it from your 1,000,000 pounds.

 

[Nathan the Machinist]

In all seriousness, I think it is possible this may have been a mistake. You see, you probably didn't really win any money. You won pounds. Pounds of what, I don't know. But what are you going to do if it is a million pounds of bananas etc? Bet you didn't think of that, huh?

But anyway, congratulation on being a million-pounds-of-something-aire!

 

[Salem Straub]

A million pound of quality tamahagane? Woo-hoo!

Dang, I get all these letters from Africa from folks who had incredibly wealthy but recently murdered relatives- and I just assumed they were trying to scam me! Thanks Stacy for showing me that I should be more credulous, maybe I can get rich too!

Of course, being the lucky winner of a million pounds, Stacy may soon be one BRUISED son-of-a-gun...

 

[Stacy E. Apelt - Bladesmith]

You guys can put this on my tombstone:
"When I won a million pounds, I was finally be free to make knives for a living - until it was all gone."

 

[Atlas Knife Company]

I think you're trying to pull a fast one on us! I know because I won that very same sweepstakes last week. I've got a new shop and power hammer on the way as soon as the money comes in.

 

[Jim Coffee]

Wish you luck, But I dont think I would have gave him my ssn and all my bank info over the phone, scammers are pretty slick now a day's.

 

[RyanW]

Wish you luck, But I dont think I would have gave him my ssn and all my bank info over the phone, scammers are pretty slick now a day's.

I live in Ooootaah, Maybe it was a 100 Pound wife!

 

[KHDaily]

Bladsmth

Did you ever get the money??? Congratulations!

 

[lava_lamp]

I'm a Millionaire!

Congratulations. Don't forget the little people.

What I would do is take the million and turn it into a billion here:

I actually had a working professional ask me once -- in all seriousness -- if the above was a scam.