Mall ninja gear?

S

spelingmastir

Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
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I started buying knives and "stuff" over ten years ago and recently got interested in these items again. Through looking through these forums, I've been pretty amused by all things "mall ninja" related, both seriously and humorously. While I certainly am not trying to be one and know that it's not "cool" to be one(people are awfully defensive about being labelled one, aren't they?), I'm impressed with their often useless and impactical knowledge. What are some examples of some covetted "tacticool" knives and other items, and not the $30 Rambo knives?
 
Kind of guy talks about being a "knife collector". Shows you some of his stuff; all that dreadful junk that Bud K. sells.
You just smile and say....."nice..."
 
Anything that promises to defy the laws of physics. For example, a knife that promises to be specially-coated to make it invisible to infrared cameras. Infrared cameras sense differences in temperature. Any object that is colder or warmer than its surroundings will be visible to an infrared camera. The only way to evade an IR camera is to always be the exact same temperature as the background. And that has nothing to do with magic coatings.
 
I guess what I'm looking for is the stuff that is actually useful for people who actually use it and very nice but usually impractically expensive for average people. For example, there's a pic that I can't find any more and it has a "mall ninja" get-up with a guy decked out with all of this "official" SEAL/SAS/etc. gear like Adidas boots and what-not. Mind you, this guy was probably 100 pounds overweight and needed to get most of his gear in size XXXL. I hate and don't care about the stuff that is truly junk like the stamped metal throwing stars, the corny looking knives, and the cheapo stuff. I like to read about impractical stuff like Barrett .50 caliber rifles and body armor that most people will never need or use. Anyway, that's the kind of stuff I'm looking for. It's a guilty pleasure...call me a mall ninja if you like.
 
You're not going to get the answers you want with a thread titled "Mall Ninja Gear." That's like asking what kind of gear is used by people with their heads stuck up their bungholes .... but only the good gear used by people with their heads stuck up their bungholes.... Start a new thread.
 
A well-informed, well-financed "mall ninja" would have all the gear that's being shoved down folks' throats by the knife and gun magazines. He would drive a Hummer H1, wear a lot of 511 and Blackhawk gear, and carry a .45 of some sort. A REAL mall ninja has a Kimber Desert Warrior all tarted up with a light/laser in a fancy dropleg sheath. He has a Barrett .50 BMG "carbine" and a Bushmaster M4 with an ACOG, vertical foregrip, bipod, aiming laser, bayonet etc, all in desert Marpat camoflage. His knife? Why, it's a Strider BT, of course. His folder is a Strider SMF. All of his gear is kept spotlessly clean. If his knife gets scratched or dulls, he just buys a new one.
 
Hoooo weeee, moonwilson! I'll guess you stir up a few responses with that post!

When SOG came out with their SEAL 2000 knife, I thought it would be the one knife that would close the doors on my knife stable (eaning I woudn't need another one, EVER). Well, I actually used the SEAL 2000 for an entire camping season. It worked ok for most things, but I did replace it with more practical, yet still 'tacticool' blades from Becker Knife & Tool. I still use the Beckers from time to time, but the SEAL 2000 has laid idle in it's drawer for at least 7 years.

I guess I'm a bad Mall Ninja because I used what I buy. Scratches and dings are true signs that one loves his tools.
 
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