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rebeltf

rebeltf

Joined
Jan 29, 2005
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The fact is many people these days are more than self centered if not downright rude. I know I spout off a lot on here , especially in Political forum but that is because in person I'm a somewhat quiet guy unless it's a friend I am conversing with , anyways.
I was taught from childhood to respect my elders , to say please , thank you and your welcome , to hold the door open for others - not just ladies - etc etc. These days though it seems we are maybe just a bit too relaxed as a society.. It seems as though rudeness is often glorified , especially in Pop culture. The author of this article I present hit it on the head with "its all about me". How much I detest that saying I cant say on here without myself being very rude. How about the self absorbed girl who has "all bow to the princess" on her liscense plate frame ? Or the bumper stickers that say such charming things like "Just do me".
On the same note I'm going to attack TV.. Cartoons have traditionally been for children IMO , I remember when Simpsons and South Park first came out , I thought they were both doggone rude and not funny at all , just my opinion though , I know a lot of people love South Park and that's fine if your an adult but how about the 7 year old that watches these shows because it is afterall a cartoon , and a rude one at that.
Is America raising a few generations of spoiled , ill-mannered kids ? I guess our future will tell.

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"The ongoing collapse of courtesy is no surprise in a nation with so many people who are as self-absorbed as black holes. Consider this T-shirt I've spotted: 'It's all about me -- deal with it.' ... Push in your seat when leaving tables in restaurants, libraries, and conference rooms. Abandoning your chair or barstool in the middle of a path obstructs those who walk by after you depart. ... It remains civilized to hold open the door for someone who is walking a few steps behind you. Letting the door slam in his face is rude. When someone opens a door for you, say 'thank you.' Muttering 'Excuse me' makes a gracious person feel his thoughtfulness is abusive. Walking by and saying nothing, as if that lady or gentleman were your servant or simply invisible, is vulgar. ... 'Please' and 'thank you' are not vulgarities. Use them generously, especially around children. They need to learn two of the language's finest words, even if adults say them less than they should. ... Trash cans are there for a reason. Use them. ... A major airline's East Coast shuttle lounge in Washington, DC's Reagan National Airport -- gateway for learned attorneys, lobbyists, journalists, and members of Congress -- recently almost suffocated beneath whole sections and loose pages of various newspapers. They were strewn across the floor and on many seats. These literate adults apparently did not have their mommies on hand to locate the ubiquitous, neglected garbage bins. The point of all this is not necessarily to turn every American man and woman, respectively, into Cary Grant and Grace Kelly, though we could do worse. The idea is to encourage each of us -- every day, in tiny ways -- to subtract from, rather than add to, the worries of an impolite world." --Deroy Murdock

Taken from Federalist Patriot digest.
 
Timely post, just an hour ago I had to tell one of my nephews friends not to call my home until he has learned some manners.
 
You got that right and, unfortunately, it's not just America that has the problem. :(
 
I’ve found that showing what manners look like is the best way to get through the day: if someone is open and alert enough to respond in kind then the day goes well, if they aren’t … then at least you know you have behaved in a way that enables you to sustain your self respect.
 
Lost In Shuffle said:
manners are a way of showing others that you respect them
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And yourself!! People without manners often have little self respect, and an abundance of low self esteem.

Or they could just be arrogant A-holes. ;):D
 
Good manners are also the ultimate display of self confidence, strength, and self respect. Rude people just don't get the fact that they are really conveying just the opposite of the attitude of superiority they seem trying to project.
 
In the days when it was ok to slap manners into your kid,(not punch), hell my old man had a 2" wide leather belt for whuppin' my butt/instilling manners(I usually deserved it at that point) a lot more teens were respectful and polite, but that was the norm back then.

Now I have a 14 year old daughter and I've never hit her but I was still able to teach her respect and manners, funny how when you treat them with respect and politeness they give it back.
 
You could've probably shortened your post a bit:

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

Not:

"Do unto others before they do unto you."

or

"Do unto others as they have done unto you."

It's amazing how we can all get along if we would just continually think: "Would I want someone else to do that?"
Sorry if I offended anyone, but I'd want you to type the same thing. ;) :D
 
Let's try to put things into perspective: in relative terms, children of the fifties, sixties, and seventies would all look pretty rude to a kid born in 1900 or earlier. I'm not condoning the behavior of many of the pre-teenagers, teenagers, and young adults in our society today by any means, and I think that certainly there is going to be a much larger jump in the deterioration of manners than there was between 50's children and 70's children (the change is discernable even comparing my class of 2007 to the class of 2008, and I'm sure the teachers will prefer 2008 to 2009 and so on. So what's the problem causing all of this? Well, people love to blame "them", the media for the behavior of kids. And it's true to some degree. I used to believe people were just looking for a scapegoat, but stations like MTV and VH1 do dicate the behavior of children. For instance, the hip-hop, gangster rap fad that's sweeping the nation. This isn't a naturally occuring phenomenon; it's the work of the entertainment industry projecting an otherwise false image of childhood behavior that is adopted by children as the accepted "norm" for them to conform to. But as Chuck Gollnick has said in the past, if we are to turn on parental controls on the TV or take televisions away it's nothing but a "a technological solution to a sociological problem ". While stations like MTV and VH1 and BET may serve as a catalyst to stir the inner want for rebellion of children (and let's not fool ourselves here; it's an age old issue if we are to look at Elvis Presley introducing that cursed rock and roll or Hendrix playing the national anthem as a guitar solo and helping to frenzy the Vietnam protest generation) but the real problem is the parents' inability to say "no". "No I don't want you to watch that" is something parents are afraid to say, and they wait to say it so that by the time they do try to assert authority their child has already lost all respect for their authoritative powers and to say "You're going to that concert" becomes a re-wording of "Hey Timmy, why don't you tell me to go perform lewd acts upon myself and storm out of the door and go to the concert anyway because of my poor parenting?" So people can blame the media all they want for showing kids how to express their angst in an exaggerated, rude, and obnoxious manner, but the biggest blame has to be placed upon the parents who can't control it. Sure the Simpsons and South Park may "corrupt the youth", but the fact that they're watching it is the real problem. If you choose to have children, don't expect every adult in America to sacrifice their adult entertainment just so you can be a lazy parent. So, Rebeltf, the answer to your question is "Yes", but the solution isn't to destroy the media, but for the parents of these little brats to start doing their jobs. So everyone can get mad at the teenager that puts the loud exhaust on his Honda Civic and peels out at the top of the street, but make sure you get mad at the slacker parent who sat around hoping the television set would raise their kid.
 
NeedleRemorse said:
Let's try to put things into perspective....the solution isn't to destroy the media, but for the parents of these little brats to start doing their jobs. So everyone can get mad at the teenager that puts the loud exhaust on his Honda Civic and peels out at the top of the street, but make sure you get mad at the slacker parent who sat around hoping the television set would raise their kid.
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Wow NeedleRemorse, that was an articulate mouthful and you are a good example of a respectful well mannered person can become.

I spend as much time with my daughter as possible, I meet and get to know all her friends, I try to teach her some values by example, I sit up with her when she has problems I'm always there for her, and I treat her with the same respect I want.

Still as the parent with 45 years of experience on this blue green rock we live on versus her 14.52 years I still have final say, and no means no and finally something a lot of kids don't seem to realize, there are consequences to their actions and she will be held accountable.

Funny thing too, even her friends who have little or no respect for their parents seem to show it here at our house, they are polite and reasonably well mannered.

You get what ya give.

NeedleRemorse, Chiclets on the way for a great reply.
 
I agree with people's comments regarding our "me" society and poor parenting as sources of rudeness, but I think there is another cause as well.

In America, we are generally conditioned not to cause trouble, meaning don't argue with people, don't express an opinion that differs from someone else's, etc. We lock up all of our true thoughts and feelings out of a mistaken notion of politeness.

I have had discussions with several of my foreign students about this. They all said that in most other countries, people politely argue and express differences of opinion, and then go about their business without any rancor. Here, however, we are afraid of expressing anything that might be construed as controversial, something my foreign students find very strange.

So, all of that supressed thought and feeling builds up and eventually erupts-as rudeness and hostility.

Funny thing about parenting-it's almost always "other people's" children who cause problems. I can't tell you how many parents have told me that they "raised their children right," yet those children are rude, little hellions. (I am NOT making a comment about people who have posted in this thread.) Like most things, it is the example that is set and not the words that are spoken that make the difference in raising children.
 
I think you put it well...when you said I was taught as a child to be respectful etc...I would have to agree with you. When children behave like idiots with no manners take a look at thier parents..usually the parents are also ill mannered morons...and then look at the grandparents..they too are ill mannered morons...as a result you bet society standards have relaxed..because these ill mannered morons are now two generations along...

I tell people when they are being rude..I dont give a phuck..If someone cuts in line..I tell them where the end of the line is..I someone doesnt take turns getting out of a parking lot after a game..they get the horn...
 
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