Passing on

Gary W. Graley

Gary W. Graley

“Imagination is more important than knowledge"
Knifemaker / Craftsman / Service Provider
Joined
Mar 2, 1999
Messages
27,430
With the recent news of my friend Tony Bose, it brought home to me how many people that I knew have since moved on from this world. A sobering thought. As you grow older that seems to be one of the many attributes of aging seeing old friends pass on, along with the onset of declining health and well being. As an old comic once said 'if I knew I was going to live so long, I would have taken better care of myself' how true that plays out for some people, myself included more so about my dental health ;) never cared to visit the dentist that much if I could go back in time to warn myself...but there would be so much I would warn myself about !

So as I start this week with the sad news about Tony Bose, I remembered that just a few years earlier I had emailed him and he imparted the news that one of his sons, Dirk, had just died and he was taking that pretty hard. Never good for a child to depart before the parent, a tough thing I would imagine.

I 'met' Tony years ago, made a desk knife sheath for a fellow for one of Tony's knives and Tony reached out to me at the end of that year and begged a favour, as if he needed to beg ;) silly old hound, but asked if I would make a bunch of those desk sheaths for some knives he planned to give away as Christmas presents that year. How could I say no? I typically do not make fixed blade sheaths but the desk knife is a different thing so I said of course I would. Later on I had the opportunity while out in Champagne IL training some people at a plastic container plant and asked Tony if it would be ok to drop by and visit. So I spent a short time at his place, met his wife, made me some ice tea ;) and we chatted. It was a good day that I wished now I had taken photos of but did not have my camera with me on this trip...

But as I view other threads on the forum, I am reminded of folks in their posts that have since moved on and while their post might bring a smile, it's a melancholy smile at best as I do miss them, even though most I have not met in person but through decades on this site they have grown to be more than just a name, more family. Even though some are that crazy uncle, every family has one, but you put up with his jokes just the same.

One other person on here that passed that I really wanted to meet up with was StJames, James Segura of Sebenza legendary fame, he had such a passion for the Chris Reeve folders it boggled the mind. Through our common link of knives became quick friends and conversed a lot, it really saddened me to learn that he had passed away and at quite an early age.

Of course there are many, unfortunately far too many to try and remember here in this thread as I know I would forget some, but it is good to keep them in our thoughts and prayers as I know a lot of you have and still do.

Ok, enough rambling from a now retired, yikes I am old now, everyone out there stay safe and if you still have friends around, be sure to let them know now how you feel and visit when you can before you can not.

G2
 
Last edited:
I put Tony Bose on the Mount Rushmore of knifemakers in my years of collecting knives, together with Bob Loveless and James Moran.

I met him at a few shows over the years, and it always struck me how down to earth he was, at least around me, as if he didn't even know how much he was respected and viewed as almost on a pedestal by me and so many others. He shared his knowledge with so many other knifemakers, and their knives are also a testament to his greatness.

RIP.
 
Gary W. Graley said:
With the recent news of my friend Tony Bose, it brought home to me how many people that I knew have since moved on from this world. A sobering thought. As you grow older that seems to be one of the many attributes of aging seeing old friends pass on, along with the onset of declining health and well being. As an old comic once said 'if I knew I was going to live so long, I would have taken better care of myself' how true that plays out for some people, myself included more so about my dental health ;) never cared to visit the dentist that much if I could go back in time to warn myself...but there would be so much I would warn myself about !

So as I start this week with the sad news about Tony Bose, I remembered that just a few years earlier I had emailed him and he imparted the news that one of his sons, Dirk, had just died and he was taking that pretty hard. Never good for a child to depart before the parent, a tough thing I would imagine.

I 'met' Tony years ago, made a desk knife sheath for a fellow for one of Tony's knives and Tony reached out to me at the end of that year and begged a favour, as if he needed to beg ;) silly old hound, but asked if I would make a bunch of those desk sheaths for some knives he planned to give away as Christmas presents that year. How could I say no? I typically do not make fixed blade sheaths but the desk knife is a different thing so I said of course I would. Later on I had the opportunity while out in Champagne IL training some people at a plastic container plant and asked Tony if it would be ok to drop by and visit. So I spent a short time at his place, met his wife, made me some ice tea ;) and we chatted. It was a good day that I wished now I had taken photos of but did not have my camera with me on this trip...

But as I view other threads on the forum, I am reminded of folks in their posts that have since moved on and while their post might bring a smile, it's a melancholy smile at best as I do miss them, even though most I have not met in person but through decades on this site they have grown to be more than just a name, more family. Even though some are that crazy uncle, every family has one, but you put up with his jokes just the same.

One other person on here that passed that I really wanted to meet up with was StJames, James Segura of Sebenza legendary fame, he had such a passion for the Chris Reeve folders it boggled the mind. Through our common link of knives became quick friends and conversed a lot, it really saddened me to learn that he had passed away and at quite an early age.

Of course there are many, unfortunately far too many to try and remember here in this thread as I know I would forget some, but it is good to keep them in our thoughts and prayers as I know a lot of you have and still do.

Ok, enough rambling from a now retired, yikes I am old now, everyone out there stay safe and if you still have friends around, be sure to let them know now how you feel and visit when you can before you can not.

G2
Click to expand...
 
Gary, All so true! It sure isn’t easy losing our friends and loved one’s as we age! Best advice I have ever heard was to live each day as it would be your last. RIP Tony Bose!
 
Sad to hear of Tony's passing. Stunned to learn he was in Champaign Illinois! I wonder if he was there when I was there for 8 yrs of my life.
 
Mongo said:
Sad to hear of Tony's passing. Stunned to learn he was in Champaign Illinois! I wonder if he was there when I was there for 8 yrs of my life.
Click to expand...

Tony wasn’t in Champagne IL I was there and drove over to his place in Terre Haute
G2
 
Sometimes it's just little things that get you thinking. I threw out a pair of shoes a couple weeks ago, they were past saving. Normally I run thru more than one pair a year, but with WFH and everything this year that's the only pair out. Then I went looking in the closet (I usually relegate the worst pair to "outside/yard" duty) and I realized that if things don't change I may never have to buy another pair of shoes. And I haven't bought a suit and/or tie in over 10 years.

I lost both my parent in the normal Christmas holiday season, which is the time I normally start calling everybody I know to make sure they're okay. That list is getting smaller every dang year.

It's weird when you realize you may never see or do some of the things and places you really love again.
 
I hear you, Gary. We get to this age and it seems we're looking around at friends and relatives and wondering "who's next?" A morbid time.

The circle of life, I suppose, but it still sucks. I still miss guys like Vampire Gerbil, James Mattis, Rob Simonich, Kit Carson... just for starters.

Funny you mention the dental health thing. My dad smoked packs a day for 50 years. Now he's on oxygen, can't breathe, can't get the mail, etc.

I asked him if he regretted taking up smoking. He said no... he regretted not taking care of his teeth. That guy, I swear.

But I hang on to one of the things he's always told me. We're not here for a long time, we're here for a good time.

So enjoy. The best you can. Celebrate all the little stuff and take none of it for granted.
 
Getting old is just another phase that we go through. We have already grown up, learned to drive, had our firsts dates, finished school, got a job, got married, went to the friends weddings, hung out in hospital nursery waiting rooms, lost grand parents and parents and friends, watched the kids grow up and walk down the isle, suffered our own health issues, and said our goodbyes to many more people. Our final years are just more of what life has to offer; we embrace it as we did all of those other experiences, with some tribulation and a sense of hope and curiosity. As long as you are true to yourself you will have no cause for regrets.

n2s
 
Time

We have all the time that there is, no more and no less than anyone else.

How we choose to spend it, while it is sometimes controlled by others, it still falls to each person how they spend it. Change is sometimes hard and often seems like you have no choice, but, you do. You really always have a choice, it just takes initiative to move on them.

Recently I retired, my plan was to be at the end of January 2020, but the vice president of our company, he lives in Sweden, asked me to stay as a favor to him until they could get a replacement. I agreed to stay until the end of June.

June arrived and a week into the month I get a phone call from the site manager and HR manager telling me to sign off my computer and that I am done working for the company right then. I was stunned, at the time I was working from home on my work laptop. They went on to say, “we want you to start your retirement now and enjoy it, don’t worry about training your replacement and you will still be paid through the end of June as if you were still on the payroll. Stunned again and at a loss for words.

I text to the VP that I am signing off for the last time and explained what had happened so he wouldn’t wonder where I went. He said oh really? Then said that he was the one that told them to do that for me, he appreciated my almost 39 years of work and my help these last few months and wanted me to start enjoying my retirement. Stunned yet again, very kind of him to do that.

But the experience left me suddenly Free from the very hectic daily work and just like that it was over, blink of an eye, snap of the fingers. I am still getting used to this new life.

We often think that the job won’t continue with out us, but it will, maybe more work and stress for others to pick up and continue but continue it does.

I am grateful for the friendships and experience that I gained from world wide travel but I am pretty happy with the new life ahead and friendships to be made.

Time, certainly unstoppable but not to stress about.

G2
 
Last edited:
Gary W. Graley said:
But the experience left me suddenly Free from the very hectic daily work and just like that it was over, blink of an eye, snap of the fingers. I am still getting used to this new life.
Click to expand...

It's a strange thing at 34 years old to watch folks retire from where I work. There's relatively little commotion made about it, not that a life dedicated in service could ever really get the commotion it deserves. All those heart-burn inducing work-related issues, stressful days, lost hours kind of evaporate, don't they? At the end of our careers we confirm what we've always kind of known- that we had a business deal to donate our time and services in exchange for pay. The very next day life goes on, and folks will go to your desk forgetting you retired, lament it for a second that you can't help them and move on to the next person who can help. It gradually fades and people stop looking for you.

It's a sad thing, but it's how it goes. The cogs of industry spin on.

I'm sorry to hear about Tony Bose and Dirk- it's hard to watch the passing of eras like that. As we get older we get these little jabs that His kingdom cometh.
From one Christian to another, Be strong brother- trust in the Lord and he'll give you purpose.
Think of it this way- you get the honor of remembering these people.
 
Gary W. Graley Gary W. Graley

Life has a way of throwing you a curve (or a slider). I was “retired” in 2009 at the age of 58, 62 was to be my sell by date

I didn’t try to find another job, I found out that I was too busy to work for a living

I wouldn’t change a thing, I got to enjoy myself before I became too old for such foolishness.
 
Last edited:
Thanks guys, always good to hear from you and your thoughts too :)
G2
 
When people retire at my work it involves some 4 letter words.

They don’t appreciate us we don’t like them. It seems to work in a dis functional way.

I think it’s mostly jealousy. The workers make more money and have better benefits and more job security then the people in the office do. So they abuse us.

They don’t see that we have all the licenses the knowledge skills experience and tools to do the job.

But like Gary said, it’s disturbing to look back and think about all my coworkers that have passed on.

So sad to hear of Tony’s son. I can’t think of anything worse than loosing a child. No matter how old.

Congrats on your retirement Gary.
 
kvaughn said:
My mom is in poor health and when she passes I'll be the oldest person in the family.
I'm having trouble wrapping my mind around that.
Click to expand...

I lost my father when I was 29 and he was 74. My mother is still around 5 years later, but I have to be honest; it’s a real head trip. With a toddler running around, I’ve become to someone else what my father was to me. I feel your pain, brother.
 
Back around 2007 thereabouts
G2
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top