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Red rust is oxidation of iron in the presence of water/moisture, which adds hydrogen to the reaction, and alters the structure of the oxide in such a way as to make it occupy more volume than the previously unoxidized steel. It also weakens the structure of the oxidized metal. This is what makes it crumble, flake and slough off, and why it causes pitting.
'Patina', or black iron oxide, is a reaction between iron and oxygen only, and doesn't alter the steel in the same way. It just forms a stable oxide layer on the exposed surface of the steel, and that's it. That stable oxide layer makes the iron less reactive to the other agents that cause rust. It's harder and more durable, and doesn't crumble or flake or slough off on it's own (without significant abrasion).
In other words, rust is literally destructive to steel, because mass is lost (by erosion) in the process. That doesn't happen with black oxide (patina).
Sometimes, the two oxides happen together, and this may lead some to believe that they're one in the same. When forcing a patina with vinegar or other acids, some red rust will usually form. But, when that part of the reaction ceases, and the red rust is cleaned away, the black/grey oxide remains. The fact that it remains, after the red rust is cleaned away, is the most obvious example of the difference in hardness and durability between the two.
Technically, any oxide of iron is often called 'rust', by 'experts' and others. I always cringe when I hear 'patina is rust' because, in terms of what it does (or doesn't do) to the steel, the 'rust' association with patina is completely misleading and usually draws the wrong conclusions in the minds of many, by the inference.
David
Thanks David. That is the best explanation I have heard.