People don't look like they sound

[tarsier]

In my current job, I work with a lot of people via email and over the phone, sometimes for years, without ever meeting them in person.

Over the phone, some people have a "neutral" voice, and I don't get any mental picture of what they look like. Other people have a very distinctive voice, and when I talk to them, I get a clear picture of what I think they look like. It's not that I try to guess. The mental picture just sort of builds itself and gets planted in my brain. I don't know where that comes from. Maybe it's a composite of other people that I've known in the past. But when I actually meet these people for the first time, the picture that I built based on their voice is almost always dead wrong. I'm introduced to somebody, and out of a complete stranger's mouth comes this familiar voice. It's very humorous, but also disconcerting at first, as my former image of them dissolves.

With email, I rarely get a mental picture of someone. I do get a sense of their age, but even that is sometimes completely off. I recently attended a conference and got a chance to meet some email contacts. I pictured all of them as young. What surprised me was how old they all were. I'm almost 40, and they were all older than me, one guy probably in his 60s.

I should add that people are often surprised when they meet me for the first time, so I guess the feeling is mutual.

Anyone else had this kind of experience?

 

[cosine]

All the time. It's actually kind of a weird feeling.

 

[Daniel Dorn]

We have monthly conference calls for my work, involving 9 other regions across the country. We also have a yearly get-together which rotates between the regions. It was very weird the first time I went to one of these, as most all the voices didn't match up. With a couple I was dead-on, though. That ended up being weirder than the mis-matches.

It's funny listening to the local DJ's flirting with the callers, as I know the ones who sound sexy are probably not nearly as attractive as their voices sound. I always hate the sound of my own voice when I hear it, and I can't imagine what people think I look like, based on hearing me. :barf:

Interesting subject...

Daniel

 

[Esav Benyamin]

I always hate the sound of my own voice when I hear it, and I can't imagine what people think I look like, based on hearing me.

One of the exercises we used to undergo at management training was to give a brief talk while being vidotaped. Then we got to join in the critique of how we looked and sounded.

 

[Danbo]

I know what you mean. When I first met Mongo and Collucci, I was amazed at how much uglier they were than I had imagined.

 

[Mongo]

I know what you mean. When I first met Mongo and Collucci, I was amazed at how much uglier they were than I had imagined.

Oh yeah? Well, good thing I work with Bulldogs, Shar-peis, Neopolitan mastiffs, Chinese Crested, and Basset hounds..... really prepared me for the shock of meeting Danbo for the first time!

 

[Rugger]

I can give you a humbling example- I used to work in radio (on-air) & I've met a bunch of people at "meet & greets" who when they figured out that I was the guy they'd been listening to just sort of squint & turn their head like a dog that's just heard something he can't comprehend...

 

[StuntDouble]

I've met dozens of people that didn't look anything like they sounded. It's led to some awkward moments in a couple of occassions, if you catch my drift.

It amazes me how much different my voice sounds on a recording, compared to how it sounds to me when I talk.

 

[Esav Benyamin]

It amazes me how much different my voice sounds on a recording, compared to how it sounds to me when I talk.

That's a standard reaction. It's the difference between hearing the sound conducted through air compared to the sound conducted through bone.

 

[tarsier]

The radio DJs is another good example of this, I hadn't thought of that. Sometimes a radio station will put up a billboard with their morning show crew, and that can be a revelation...

Danbo, Mongo, I knew some of you guys who have met at Blade Show or similar would have to give each other grief on this topic...

That's a standard reaction. It's the difference between hearing the sound conducted through air compared to the sound conducted through bone.

Interesting, I always wondered why that was.

 

[TexasNativeDRJH]

I worked at a car dealership ordering parts over the phone to many other dealerships and one salesman was noticeably more professional sounding than all the others. About a year later I had the opportunity to actually pick up the parts and meet the salesman and he was a total slob in person. Proof you can't judge a person based on looks.

 

[BlackDPlus]

I've thought about this a lot too. I do phone and e-mail contact with the chance to meet some people occasionally.
The mental picture never matches.

This works both ways though. I got to meet a customer who I had gotten to know very well on the phone. His response when we met..." Oh my god, they sent a hitman".