Personal Vs. Just Business?

RyanMalpiede

RyanMalpiede

Joined
Oct 5, 1998
Messages
5,400
I work in a 10 person professional services company selling high end microsoft accounting systems with implementation / training services. Question, in a small company where coworkers end up feeling more like extended family ... how do you keep things business minded and not take things personally when "Constructive Criticism" is dished your way?

Friday, I had a consultant in a monthly staff meeting say ... "You guys aren't salesmen (two of us) you are order takers, and bad ones at that!" Had to do everything I had in me not to reach across the table and hit him in the throat.

From that point on, all eyes were on me knowing that what he had said had cut me deep.

After two days I think I can take what he said and spin it into something good. However, I feel I will still have issues dealing with this sort of comment when all eyes are on me. Help?

thanks,

ryan
 
Do the best you can, try to improve, take comments both seriously and with a grain of salt. If you confident of what you're doing, it keeps the emotions in check.

If you're asking about being able to control your emotions, can't help ya.
 
Try to turn it into something positive. If someone complains (especially during a meeting) ask what you can do to improve that specific aspect of your performance if you think his SPECIFIC criticism is spurious tell him why. Do what you can to improve your co-workers specific impressions of your performance because sometimes impressions are more important than facts.
 
I don't know if the person who said this to you stated the basis for his remark, but I will say that you are never going to please everyone. That doesn't mean that you did anything wrong or poorly; rather, for no reason other than God knows what, some people are always going to say negative things to you. Maybe you are the best and they are jealous. Maybe they are just general pains in the butt. Hear what they say and try to figure out why they are saying it. If there is a valid basis for their remarks, then it's an opportunity for you to improve. If there is no valid basis for what they say, then dismiss their comments with a grain of salt and go on.
 
as mentioned, if the remark is valid, make the changes. if not, screw him.

on the one hand, you are like extended family, and you should be able to give and take constructive criticism.

on the other, criticism must be constructive and politely offered. doesnt sound like what was said to you was either.
 
There's nothing wrong with going back to the individual and saying that you've taken some time to think about his "suggestion" and, as per kamkazmoto, would like to hear some specific suggestions to improve your salesmanship. If he has none, you know he is a jerk. If that happens you could then whack him in the throat, or maybe talk to a trusted supervisor about the situation and ask how he/she would like to deal with poor company morale created by jerkwad. My experience with many consultants suggests they will often try for high-impact tactics (maybe like this) because, in order to get paid, they have to show results quickly. Unfortunately they often aren't all that invested in the people they are dealing with, nor concerned about the mayhem left in their wake.
Any consultants reading this who are offended, if you aren't behaving thusly, then I'm not talking/writing about you.
all da best,
rats...
 
This consultant is one of the implementers of our accounting package. He is one of the most billable, and one of the ones with the lowest customer appreciation ratings. We have lost 6 customers in the last 3 years at his hand. I am the one that usually calls him on his mess ups to upper management. This public humiliation was payback in his eyes I am sure.

Turning this into a positive sounds like the path I need to take.
 
Or you could just cut all four valve stems on his tires.

Want to borrow my serrated Spyderco D'Allara Rescue? :D
 
RyanMalpiede said:
This consultant is one of the implementers of our accounting package. He is one of the most billable, and one of the ones with the lowest customer appreciation ratings. We have lost 6 customers in the last 3 years at his hand. I am the one that usually calls him on his mess ups to upper management. This public humiliation was payback in his eyes I am sure.

Turning this into a positive sounds like the path I need to take.
You guys aren't salesmen (two of us) you are order takers...
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

It sounds like this guy's idea of a "salesman" is someone who cons others into purchasing a product regardless of the customer's needs. From some of your other posts Ryan, it appears you consider many factors when you make a sale, including the relationship (I know, sounds "touchy-feely") with the customer.

Perhaps, if you want to up the ante, you can ask jerkwad in a public setting, why is it he feels a need to attempt to belittle you and your efforts for the company? You would want to be able to give concrete examples (you might also wish to document such behavior, so that when management finally needs to get rid of him, there will exist evidence of his toxic behavior) of his attempts. He will also likely deny he was trying to belittle you, so this may be in vain. In my experience, the people (whether kids or adults) who are acting the worst are often the most fearful and/or pitiful. Remember, you get the luxury of being you; he is stuck being himself.
Good luck with this.

all da best,
rats...
 
I'd keep it polite, civil and professional, but persue understanding his comments and repeatedly ask for his specifics input for improvements. I politely wouldn't let him off the hook, but I think above all I'd document even if it's one way from you. Even if you're asked to leave the company at some point, it may be valuable to show the efforts that you did in the name of benefiting from constructive criticism and improving the company's bottom line. This may be one to keep entirely business, and tip toe around the times when things are feeling like an extended family.
Good luck, Craig
 
Comments like that without complete documentation to back up said statement is complets bullshit and completly out of line. I would ask this " consultant" to further elaborate on what exactly the frick he meant and to give specific examples.

My guess is that he will not be able to back up this statement to wit I would remind him that the sales force is what keeps low life slackers like him employed. Sales based orginizations always crap on the salespeople because we are infact on the front lines everyday while these REMF cornholers sit in thier cubicles and pass judgment..

as for the close as family stuff...can it right away..I work in a company of six people..none of them have ever been to my house. They do not know my home phone..my kids names...my Milfs name..How I spend my money...what I do in my free time...I keep my distance from co-workers...they cannot be trusted to not screw you over in a heart beat..
 
You get the same overlap between business and "family" in a large company -- if you let it. Like Ren said, "can it right away". Keep it ALL business-like. When someone challenges you, make him say what he means. If he ducks the question, sneer and drop it. Then go to your boss and let him know this guy is poison.

I was at a management training course with a really good manager from California, but we did not work the same way. On one project, he explained his way of doing it, and I pointed a finger at him and shouted out "Wrong!" Man, he came out of his chair and put one knee up on the table, like he was coming after me. THEN he calmed down and we worked out a good compromise. You have to be aggressive ... OK, within the bounds of how your company sees things. In the post office, we did get loud. :p

Don't ever let the bad guys intimidate you. They are not your family, they are not your friends, and they would feel like they won the office politics lottery if they forced you out of your job. Any time you catch this guy antagonizing a customer, let alone losing one, call HIM out at a meeting, and make HIM explain what he's doing to earn his keep. After all, what's the use of you being the best salesman around if operations keeps blowing the contracts?
 
RyanMalpiede said:
Friday, I had a consultant in a monthly staff meeting say ... "You guys aren't salesmen (two of us) you are order takers, and bad ones at that!" Had to do everything I had in me not to reach across the table and hit him in the throat.

From that point on, all eyes were on me knowing that what he had said had cut me deep.
Click to expand...

Ahh, the "Meeting Sniper." Looks like he scored a kill with that one.

The best way to deal with a sniper is to turn the attention back on him. In a strong, professional manner you need to stand him up and bitch slap him: Make him back his statement up with fact. Something like this:

"OK Mr. Jones, I see you have a strong opinion here. That was an opinion, right? Unless you have some concrete facts to back up that unprofessional statement, it is only an opinion. So, please enlight us, do you have a valid reason for trying to humiliate me in front of our co-workers?"

Chances are, he will need to pick his jaw up off the table. Watch him squirm. When he can't back his statement up with fact, shoot his answers down in a professional, calm voice:

"I'm sorry, that's an opinion... a conjecture... a generalization... baseless.. etc."

He'll never do that you you again.
 
I have a job in which I constantly have to criticize my employees.

I hope I never say anything that rude, and if I ever heard someone else say something like that, I would call them on it. Nothing "constructive" there.
 
RyanMalpiede said:
This consultant is one of the implementers of our accounting package. He is one of the most billable, and one of the ones with the lowest customer appreciation ratings. We have lost 6 customers in the last 3 years at his hand.
Click to expand...

That would have been my response.

RyanMalpiede said:
I am the one that usually calls him on his mess ups to upper management. This public humiliation was payback in his eyes I am sure.
Click to expand...

And if you responded with the information above you would have one-upped the POS again.

RyanMalpiede said:
Turning this into a positive sounds like the path I need to take.
Click to expand...

I would approach that by putting him on the spot publicly to make suggestions as to how everyone can work better. Do it at the next monthly staff meeting.
 
consultant is one of the implementers of our accounting package.
Click to expand...

Developers everywhere generally think pretty low of sales people so you need a big grain of salt. Just the way it is.
 
We had our weekly sales meeting this morning with the owner. She apologized for not stoping him in mid sentence. She also gave me her every devotion to help us with any challenges we had in the pre-sales cycle. Just now while writing this, I had one of the other consultants come into my office to apologize for the other consultants statements ... that he did not agree with how it was presented or the degree.

I will turn this negative into a positive and try to leave revenge off my mind.

Honestly guys ... thanks for your reply's! :thumbup:
 
Quick jab to the throat would be the best medicine. ;)

However, there is a way to break him otherwise.

Backstory. I work for the family business, but that has never played into how I'm treated- if I meet the required goals (as per sales/installs/etc.) I stay. Otherwise, find another place. I'm paid by the job, not the hour. If I need to do 5 doors, I do five, whether it takes 5 hours or 15.

We had a guy last summer we hired for installs, and he was slacking something awful. My boss called a staff meeting, with all of the installers, this guy included.

Slacker guy was called out for only doing 3 the entire preceding week. He turns, points at me and says he saw me with my truck parked out in a cemetery the Friday before, and that at least he was working!

I just looked him square in the eye, and got out my job book. "1822... 4 doors. Done. 124. 3 doors. Done. 2593. 1 door. Done. 4616. 5 doors. Done..."

The list continued as I read off the previous week. By the time I was done, I'd listed 29 doors, 18 gates and 97 window guards. He'd darn near collapsed.

The defense rests.
 
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