Poems...

J

jessisjaded

Joined
Jan 1, 2008
Messages
211
I thought this would be interesting...so here we go...

promises

I can't promise you perfection,
But be sure to know I try.
I can promise you I won't forget,
All the times you helped me through life.

I can't promise you perfection,
But this still feels right.
I can promise what I have;
And that I'll fight for you.

I can't promise you perfection,
So i ask your forgiveness.
I can promise you that I'll earn it,
Just help me try...

I can't promise you perfection,
And I don't expct it in return.
I can promise you a life of love,
My fire for you still burns...

I promise you my Faith,
I promise you my Heart,
I promise you my Trust,
I promise you you your Space,
I promise you no Lies,
I promise you a wonderful Life.

Give me a chance to prove it.
This is all I ask;
Help me...
And I'll give this all I've got.



Jes Clark- 3/5/08
 
...i am double posting so this shows up top... and i'm asking for opinions. please and thank you.
Jes
 
The big question is... did she like it?

I'm no expert so my opinion doesn't count. It's like me asking you what do you think of this one...


My Love

Went to ‘Pete’s Pit Stop’ for a few brews.
Sat at the bar watching the television news.

When she walked through the door, my jaw hit the floor!
She was looking real fine… I felt a certain rapport.

Right away I noticed all the good stuff –
Long hair, beautiful face, and sure enough,

A great pair of breasts that were a delight!
And that short little skirt was oh so tight!

Her legs started at her hips & went all the way to the floor.
They were so very sexy, I couldn’t ignore!

As she came closer to me, I noticed her eyes.
Ever closer she came, not even glancing at the other guys.

Getting back to her eyes… she had two it is true.
I didn’t even mind that one was brown while the other was blue!

She sat down next to me and started to speak.
Her opening line was so very unique.

“How you doing Charlie… buy me a drink?”
I smiled at her and gave her a wink.

“My name’s not Charlie but that’ll do for now.”
“I’ll buy you a beer … hope you like Lowenbrau!”

Our conversation went on for nearly 3 hours.
Pretty soon everyone was gone… Pete’s was all ours.

Then the place was closing, we had to skedaddle.
I suggested my place for a little rock, roll & rattle.

“Oh Charlie…” says she, “not tonight, honey, that would be a mistake.”
“What? I haven’t even gotten to first base and you have a headache?”

The End
 
I'm sorry to say it sounds more like a negotiation than a poem.

It really seems choppy, without rhythm, that's not to say that poetry requires rhythm but all good poetry has a flow, just look up or listen to some Bob Dylan Lyrics and you'll see what I mean.

Dylans 115 Dream and Maggies Farm are good examples.

I give ya credit for postin' your poetry, it's hard to be criticized, remember though, it's your work bein' critiqued not you.
 
Clydetz said:
The big question is... did she like it?
Click to expand...

He actually loved Promises... Lol. I'm a she, and i think that poem (my love) was rather great. :D gotta love the chick, and the effort the guy made. :p

P.s. thanks for the input T. much appreciated.
 
Time
You have time, I have time.
We both have time.
We have time to play
We have to time to Joke
We have time to fight.
We have time to be mad
We have time to apologize, too.
But, when someone's time is up,
you tend to think about the bad times
when you should think about the good times
That way your memories live forever,
Even when your time is up.

I wrote that when I was 12. What do you guys think?
 
jessisjaded said:
He actually loved Promises... Lol. I'm a she, and i think that poem (my love) was rather great. :D gotta love the chick, and the effort the guy made... :p
Click to expand...

Oops, sorry about that jessisjaded! Here's another...

For aceofblades... I wrote that when I was 60. What do you think? :D


Judy

The Judy I knew was from Abilene.
Like the town… she weren’t mean.
Had beautiful eyes of aquamarine.
And when she came on the scene,
Felt like ya swallowed a cup of caffeine.
You’d hop around like a jumpin’ bean.
But talkin’ to her made ya feel so serene.
Can’t forget Judy blue eyes from Abilene.
 
I had a dog who was dying by inches
And dying by inches is very hard
So I took back in the alley
And I let him die by the yard.
 
Never realized how many of these rhymes I made up! Here's another...

Kate

I used to live with a girl by the name of Kate Vilarski.
Who would often cry… “You love your dog more than me.”
“Choose me or the dog”… she once had ranted & raved.
I looked at those big, brown eyes, I wouldn’t be swayed.
“Kate”, I said… “You’re right my love, the bitch must go!”
“It’s been nice knowing you… Clyde & I will miss you so!”
 
Clydetz said:
Never realized how many of these rhymes I made up! Here's another...
[\QUOTE]

It's fine. :). you write very good poetry. As does Ace. :).
Here's another of mine.



Do As I Say
In memory of Craig Roberts;
For Wendy, Clara (best friend), and Heather
11/24/07

Can you put a price,
On something you hold dear?
A thing given life,
Let out your tear.

Keep holding onto
Everything that once was
When there’s nothing to do
Remember that love.

Remember the good times,
All the old days.
As the wind blows and rings the chime
Remember the one that used to say,
“Do as I say not as I do.”
Click to expand...
 
Breakfast of Champions.

We kiss goodbye in the morning, like the rest…but not so very.
Today my heart swings from the noose of your sad-eyed 1,000 yard stare, nostrils flare.

We take that breakneck commute in liquid traffic while the music hangs on my chest with wires to my ears, drowning out the screams of a tortured engine.

Lumps should take heed that they breed, without the bread to feed…there ought to be a law.

And, you wonder why hatred grows, and glows in that heart of mine, that swings from the noose of your sad-eyed 1,000 yard stare.


This one is not entirely finished....started it on an airplane from Houston to SoCal, while a baby kicked the back of the seat of the person sitting next to me throughout the entire flight.

Best Regards,

STeven Garsson
 
I prefer writing the light hearted rhymes but every once in awhile a serious one creeps in there...

The Change


When I was a young man and very bold,
I had a way with words or so I was told.
The ladies they loved me… I had my pick.
Life was fun and really a kick!

Along comes a war and it changed me so.
I forgot about fun and started to grow.
Everything changes; nothing stays the same.
Now it’s all gone and there’s no one to blame.
This thing called life is such a funny game.

‘With age comes wisdom’; I haven’t seen that!
But I’m trying to get all the answers down pat.
As life continues, it does seem to get better.
A little slower maybe, but I’m no ‘go-getter’.

It’s my family & friends that I am missing.
Can’t help myself from all this reminiscing!
Everything changes, nothing stays the same.
Now it’s all gone and there’s no one to blame.
This thing called life is such a funny game.

Geeze... now I feel down. Somwone got a humorous poem?
 
"Paranoia Roses" ~Jes Clark~

A light comes on,
As a door closes.'
Friends have gone,
Like summers' roses.
The cold wind blows,
Through my window pane.
My emotions show,
I'm thought insane.
I'm trying to sort,
Through my life,
To find a retort,
To my knife.
Paranoia sets in.
I'm curled in a ball,
Living in my sin,
I'm at a draw.
Between Life and Death.
This is where i am,
In a wealth,
Of the living Damned.
None are worthy.
No one deserving.
All are Earthly,
Their souls disturbing.
None have paid,
Not a single one.
Our destiny out-laid,
All say, "I've won."
When in truth,
Only few shall.
When in truth,
Many gravely fall.


can you tell i get bored easily guys??
Jes
 
You've seen this one several times before Jess, but what the heck, none of these boys have seen it:
Three Words.
In the English language there are three words, that, when apart, don't mean a whole lot. But when strung together have an unbelievable power. They can lift ones spirits high into the heavens, higher than the moon. And to drop another's into the depths of the earth, even to the gates of Hell and beyond. they can speak of promise, or they can seal a mans doom. what are these three amazing words you might ask? They are simple: I Love You. In those three words is more passion and meaning than in a thousand other words combined, And those three words are the reason Jesus died. because HE loved YOU.
Jeff Woodworth.



BTW: I wrote that at something like two in the morning a little over a year ago now I guess. I never thought it was very good, but the girl loved it and everyone else seems to think it has a good message, but think what you like.
PS: Jess, i'll try and dig up "Stars Oversee" and post it. :D




Jeff


EDIT: Found It, and I know it doesn't ryme worth crap. But it meant a lot to Jess when I wrote it.
Stars Oversee.
Sometimes words run out, and only Gods amazing creation can come to your aid.
look at the stars, stretching farther than you can run.
they go beyond reason and time, beyond arguments and trouble.
they are always there, no matter the turmoil that they oversee.

By Jeff W.
 
I like what I'm reading... have you all felt better for putting your feelings into words? This rhyme was started a couple of years ago after a couple of beers and has been continuously added to. It is also the first time I had even thought of putting my feelings to rhyme. Clyde is pictured in my avatar... he was a stray dog somebody 'dumped' at the company I worked at. I already had a dog but no one seemed to be able to give Clyde a home. I eventually took him in and we became good friends over the following 10 years.


A Remembrance…

We have had more good days than bad.
But my old friend, this one is very sad.
We must take this last trip to the vet.
This grieves me so, it’s the worst day yet!

I’ll be with you my buddy until the end.
My love & trust of you will never bend.
Please forgive me my friend; I hate to see you suffer.
Holding you in my arms has made our parting tougher!

I’ll hold on to you as you lay on the table.
Hugging you so as long as I’m able.
As tears fill my eyes that I can not end,
I’ll continue to comfort you, my best friend.

I’ll hold you and stroke you while you leave this earth.
I’d like to think of your passing as a brand new birth.
I will never forget the day I brought you home!
All nervous and shy, you were ready to roam.

I wasn’t sure what to name you on that very first day.
Patches or Rascal seemed like good names for a stray.
Your name was chosen when I made you my legal pet.
Bonnie was at home, so… Clyde was the name you’d get!

You didn’t seem sure I was the ‘human’ for you.
I now confess that idea crossed my mind, too!
But soon we tested each other’s strengths.
And found we both could go to great lengths…

To protect each other from what life sent our way.
All I can say is I’m glad you decided to stay.
You taught me to be patient, strong and brave.
I will always remember life’s lessons you gave.

I‘ll cherish the fun we had on our walks,
And the uplifting feelings gotten from our serious talks.
You always seemed to listen to all I would tell
And give me that look that said “I think you’re swell!”

Those floppy black ears always brought me a smile.
That ‘over the back’ curled tail just suited your style.
On our walks, I was very impressed with your strut.
In my eyes you were always more than just a mutt.

As the years passed and you grew less active and older,
You became more dependent and much less bolder.
You followed me around like a faithful brother.
Such a friend were you… I’m sure I’ll find no other.

I’m sorry to see your life come to such an end.
I’ve always considered you one hell of a friend.
Go my faithful pal and with the other dogs play.
We’ll meet again, my friend., on some fine day.

Clyde has gone to where the good dogs go.
And my tears… they still do flow.
Clyde has been gone for over a year.
I continue thinking of him and shedding a tear.

I have a new friend now but it’s just not the same.
He’s trying hard to fill the void and Casper is his name.
He is doing his best to show he’s brave and smart.
But Clyde is still the one I have in my heart.
 
jeffdk06 said:
Stars Oversee.
Sometimes words run out, and only Gods amazing creation can come to your aid.
look at the stars, stretching farther than you can run.
they go beyond reason and time, beyond arguments and trouble.
they are always there, no matter the turmoil that they oversee.

By Jeff W.
Click to expand...

This Poem meant the world to me for about a month. It helped a LOT at that time and I look back on it still and remember how just a little poem and a great friend helped so much. Thank you (yet agian) Jeff. Much appreciated still.

Jes

P.s. to the rest of you. YOU ARE AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! thanks for sharing!
 
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