- Joined
- Aug 26, 2005
- Messages
- 4,106
No this is not a thread about inebriated friends . (Really I don,t know how you leap to such erroneous conclusions.) 
It is Dear Sirs about cutlery .
Bread knives actually, though they do have delusions of grandeur .
These fanciful daydreams may be fueled by a slim willow leaf shape.
Their is also a strong suggestion of bloodthirstiness about them.
They have those tiny serrations some breadknives have along one front edge.
Now for the socketed part . They are ferruled , with them accepting a nicely turned barrel shaped wood handle . Nice knives you might say . They are from the Fleetwood designer series . Top Drawer? Not at all. Just some nice implements of severance combined with a spreading servitude .
Now that I have told you how nice they are, I wish to destroy them . Yes Sir , I am just the bourgeois for the job . No delusions of grandeur for me . Fine dinnerware is amiss at my table. I don't even have a table .
Well actually there is one in the backyard I use for partys and B:B:Qs .
I want to remove said handle from aforementioned socket . I would like to do this without destroying the handle. Its a nice handle. It would loan itself as if by design to some breadknives I am thinking of making.
O:K: I,ll stop with the blatherous gas letting . These puppies would make super small game heads for heavy arrows or Atlatl spears . I have no need of fine kitchen cutlery except perhaps for more serviceable slicers. Oh I have my Henckels and Sabatiers . There are a few less loftily parented paring knives and deboners that get the nod from me as well.
These bread knives, soon to be implements of cast destruction, are just too sweet to spend their lives in a crowded drawer of mongrelian upstarts .
They would neither hold their own among my displayed bladed friends of distinctive lineage . They would be chided out of the kingdom. Their courtly manners would be belied by their gap toothed grins .
How best may I put them out of their short lived misery ? They are stainless .
The kind of stainless that suggests a very different more open structure under the surface . I confess to knowing little of this. Could I gently heat these so as to expand the socket ever so slightly ? A careful twist and pull to follow ? I suspect there may be an inner rim inside the ferrule which snaps/pressure fits over a groove in the tapered forefront of the handle . Again pure speculation on my part. This may make heating more or less futile .
Heating itself may not be a good idea . Worse comes to worse I will wrench the handles loose . I would rather not as an excess of force offends my sensibilities . Much as you are proabably offended by this entire proposal .
Protest not.I will heed not . Their days are numbered . The die is cast .
Help me end their lives in as genteel manner as they aspired to .
It is Dear Sirs about cutlery .
Bread knives actually, though they do have delusions of grandeur .
These fanciful daydreams may be fueled by a slim willow leaf shape.
Their is also a strong suggestion of bloodthirstiness about them.
They have those tiny serrations some breadknives have along one front edge.
Now for the socketed part . They are ferruled , with them accepting a nicely turned barrel shaped wood handle . Nice knives you might say . They are from the Fleetwood designer series . Top Drawer? Not at all. Just some nice implements of severance combined with a spreading servitude .
Now that I have told you how nice they are, I wish to destroy them . Yes Sir , I am just the bourgeois for the job . No delusions of grandeur for me . Fine dinnerware is amiss at my table. I don't even have a table .
Well actually there is one in the backyard I use for partys and B:B:Qs .
I want to remove said handle from aforementioned socket . I would like to do this without destroying the handle. Its a nice handle. It would loan itself as if by design to some breadknives I am thinking of making.
O:K: I,ll stop with the blatherous gas letting . These puppies would make super small game heads for heavy arrows or Atlatl spears . I have no need of fine kitchen cutlery except perhaps for more serviceable slicers. Oh I have my Henckels and Sabatiers . There are a few less loftily parented paring knives and deboners that get the nod from me as well.
These bread knives, soon to be implements of cast destruction, are just too sweet to spend their lives in a crowded drawer of mongrelian upstarts .
They would neither hold their own among my displayed bladed friends of distinctive lineage . They would be chided out of the kingdom. Their courtly manners would be belied by their gap toothed grins .
How best may I put them out of their short lived misery ? They are stainless .
The kind of stainless that suggests a very different more open structure under the surface . I confess to knowing little of this. Could I gently heat these so as to expand the socket ever so slightly ? A careful twist and pull to follow ? I suspect there may be an inner rim inside the ferrule which snaps/pressure fits over a groove in the tapered forefront of the handle . Again pure speculation on my part. This may make heating more or less futile .
Heating itself may not be a good idea . Worse comes to worse I will wrench the handles loose . I would rather not as an excess of force offends my sensibilities . Much as you are proabably offended by this entire proposal .
Protest not.I will heed not . Their days are numbered . The die is cast .
Help me end their lives in as genteel manner as they aspired to .
