Take a kid hiking!

[unimogbert]

Took the troubled 15 year old stepson of a young friend of mine hiking. The friend was, himself, a somewhat troubled youngster when we first started hiking together 20 years ago. He has turned into a respectable man, now with a wife and stepson.

For the "audition" hike we went to an old airplane crash site in the woods. On the way we stopped and sampled an old played out mica mine then travelled offtrail thru many "tree puzzles."

After looking at the airplane pieces we cooked a ramen noodle lunch over Esbit solid fuel stoves in canteen cups. (Ramen is now his favorite food!

Then we headed back to the jeep - again mostly off trail.

Near the jeep we stopped to practice fire building in an old fire ring. He used a magnesium block/sparker and his gigantic WalMart Rambo knife uselessly for awhile before we switched to toilet paper and butane lighter. Still didn't work very well because it had been lightly raining all day and everything was damp. More study will be needed in the future. I just let him try whatever he thinks will work to get it out of his system. Next lesson will be on the structure needed for a good fire lay.

We both had a good time and we'll go again soon - maybe this weekend.

He slept most of the way home then went inside and collapsed for more sleep. His mom couldn't be happier

I find that the situation is kind of like an old dog in the presence of a puppy. The puppy's enthusiasm is contagious and it's fun to watch them start to "get it." And it makes old places and old knowledge new again.

(the young pup is really shocked that the older-than-dirt guy can just walk and walk and walk and walk - even uphill! ;-)
Of course the ulterior motive is to have some important man-to-man conversations eventually to help him navigate his life.

If more boys could get out in the woods - the world would be a better place.

 

[baldtaco-II]

Pukka.

Something I have to be very aware of is how dismissive I can be of groups that I usually find irritating. Prima Donna girls and boys that come on all bald often evokes a knee-jerk response in me along the lines of “I'm glad you lot stay out of the woods and prefer your pox-havens, it contains the problem”. Beyond that though, and on a 1 to 1, given the chance, you can actually tap into something very rewarding.

 

[Codger_64]

Every young man needs a mentor. In the woods and in life. Good for you taking the time and interest. Enjoy the journey and never forget that you were once that young.

 

[unimogbert]

and never forget that you were once that young.

That's the part that I enjoy. Reminders of when it was new for me.

I'll be writing my Father a heartfelt letter for this Father's day for his patient teaching when I was young. Thinking about how to approach this young man has helped me appreciate my Dad's skill in mentoring me.

 

[Codger_64]

That's the part that I enjoy. Reminders of when it was new for me.

I'll be writing my Father a heartfelt letter for this Father's day for his patient teaching when I was young. Thinking about how to approach this young man has helped me appreciate my Dad's skill in mentoring me.

This is what it is all about. I so much enjoy seeing my now-adult son enjoy fishing, hiking and camping. Not to mention teaching his teenaged daughter. I suggest you send your dad a picture of you and your protégé along with the letter. Something to invoke his memories of him and you. Building a fire or fishing?

 

[unimogbert]

I sent my Dad pictures of my new buddy kneeling over the fire pit trying to spark the fire. He liked that.
More pictures in the future.

I think there's something in our instincts to do mentoring.

 

[Codger_64]

I sent my Dad pictures of my new buddy kneeling over the fire pit trying to spark the fire. He liked that.
More pictures in the future.

I think there's something in our instincts to do mentoring.

I agree. All the more sad that more fathers don't have that instinct though, to be truthful, most boys learn better when taught by men other than their fathers.

 

[Danke42]

That's called proximity bias when you're teaching or being taught by someone near to you.

Tonight I could teach my wife how to use her new smartphone. Or I could head out to the trails and let the kids show here.

I think I"ll be on the trail.

I love hiking with my kids and I use that as our serious talking time. It's much better than sitting them down in a stuffy room.

 

[Faiaoga]

You are to be congratulated for helping out this young man, especially when you are under no obligation to do so. As a teacher, I have seen many 'troubled" young people who could benefit from what you are doing. Counseling sessions, psychological tests and other interventions often cannot do as much:thumbup:

 

[unimogbert]

, to be truthful, most boys learn better when taught by men other than their fathers.

I think that's right. I remember some men talking to me about life and stuff. The auto-rebellion reflex is absent. We also have a deal - if he doesn't like me, it's over. If I don't like him, it's over. All voluntary association and all advice is non-binding. I think there's something important in making it voluntary.

Anyway, thanks for the encouragement. I just finished the letter to my Dad. He was really good at avoiding triggering the auto-rebellion reflex.

 

[Mistwalker]

Very cool post man, good on you. I am very grateful for the time my mentors spent teaching me, and I love teaching my children.

 

[22-rimfire]

Every young man needs a mentor. In the woods and in life. Good for you taking the time and interest. Enjoy the journey and never forget that you were once that young.

How true. Once they respect you, you can accomplish many good character building things with a younger person. Often you can accomplish more than the parents because they know you are volunteering your time and don't "have to". And yes to the comment above about a non-father teaching a young man about the woods. Uncles are good!

 

[Quirt]

That's called proximity bias when you're teaching or being taught by someone near to you.

This is Proximity Bias? Please expound more on this construct. I'm interested in learning more about this theory or phenomena. Thx.

 

[unimogbert]

Second outing on Friday. Not sure what was up but he didn't have the energy to get up a hill. Barely got up the hill that was only half of the day's goal. So we diverted to a fire ring where he was able to get the fire going using a firesteel and his pocket knife. Then we cooked ramen in canteen cups. Then he wanted a nap. So he rolled up in a poncho in the shade on some pine needles and zonked for an hour.

Then he had another round of ramen (cooked on an isobutane stove) and we mosied back to the car. His stride is really short and I have a hard time walking slow enough if I'm leading. He finally assented to leading which helped a lot.

I suspect he might have stayed up all night the night before.

The day was still a good one so long as I modify my objective down to "having fun in the woods" rather than reaching the airplane crash site.
I'm ok with that for awhile.

 

[unimogbert]

3rd outing consisted of letting him drive my Cherokee in 4WD LO (only) on a local easy 4WD trail. We metal detected around several fire rings finding shell casings and tent stakes and very few bottle caps or pull tabs. Good day - but not much exercise.

4th outing was yesterday trying the longer but gentler route to the site on the 2nd outing. Similar result. Letting him drive the 2 miles from county road to parking was the high spot. After 75 minutes of very, very slow gentle walking uphill he gave up. So after feeding him some ramen I left him with a poncho, twine, his pack with water & trail mix, a pocket knife and a hunter-orange bandana to mark his spot and he hung out while I zipped uphill for another 45 minutes then back down. I found him asleep.

He walked back to the jeep pretty quickly but is busy negotiating me into doing things other than hiking. (maybe bicycling next weekend)

Kind of alarming that a 59 year old balding, graying, old guy carrying most of the stuff has loads more energy than a 15 year old boy.......

 

[22-rimfire]

.....Kind of alarming that a 59 year old balding, graying, old guy carrying most of the stuff has loads more energy than a 15 year old boy.......

Yes it is alarming. The kid was probably up all night (again). It's a question of priorities and his do not match yours.

At 59, you might consider yourself an "old guy" (you are of course relative to him.), but you're still in your prime and just beginning the age dictated coast downward.

 

[unimogbert]

Yes it is alarming. The kid was probably up all night (again). It's a question of priorities and his do not match yours.

At 59, you might consider yourself an "old guy" (you are of course relative to him.), but you're still in your prime and just beginning the age dictated coast downward.

Don't think he stayed up all night before this one. I think he's just made up his mind that he's not "the athletic type." On 1st hike he said he wanted to be a Navy SEAL - so I loaned him two books. Checked on that Sunday and he's re-decided he'd rather be a mechanic and hadn't opened the books.

Warranty seems to be up at age 50. Then the plunge into breakdown and malfunction begins. It seems to be quite precipitous such that missing exercise for a week can't be made up in a week but it might take 3 weeks to get back to where you were.

 

[22-rimfire]

....Warranty seems to be up at age 50. Then the plunge into breakdown and malfunction begins. It seems to be quite precipitous such that missing exercise for a week can't be made up in a week but it might take 3 weeks to get back to where you were.

Depends a lot on the life you have lived and your genes (family traits and tendencies). I am just beginning to grapple with this age thing. I was out biking for the first time in years (mentioned in another thread here) and believe me, after biking about 12 miles, I was not feeling very well and I REALLY felt it the following day. I think I almost blacked out during that ride..... trying to figure that one out. The world just got a bit "dark" for a minute during one of my rest stops.