The solution to a non-existent problem...

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Well, the other night, I had the misfortune to watch an episode of Penn and Teller's "Bullshit" series. This one dealt with the Death Penalty, and was essential a soapbox for Penn Jillette's vitriolic, left-wing rhetoric. Throughout the show, he took every opportunity to shout about how Capital Punishment is murder, and that no matter what other considerations you might argue, it's still taking a human life, and it's murder.

So much for that last, vestigial shred of respect I had for him as an artist. But anyway, as my wife and I sat discussing the various ways that this show had made us angry, I struck upon a brilliant (stop that! I hear you all laughing!) idea. Basically, the problem that the cuddle-bunny hug-a-thugs out there have with Capital Punishment is that it's just so mean to kill a person, even if he did disembowel their child with a coat hanger before he set them on fire. Well, I propose the following as a solution:

Allow private citizens to ransom a death row convict.

Not out of prison, mind you. Nope, once they're convicted, they stay inside. But, as a salve to the Left's conscience, once the State has tried, convicted and sentenced a criminal to death as normal, a citizen (and it has to be one, no conglomerations or activism groups, we want a single name on them, for reasons I'll discuss later) can appeal to the state to sponsor that criminal, and assume all fiscal responsibility for their life. All costs--housing, food, medical upkeep, etc. will be the responsibility of that person. The inmate will still be housed in a maximum-security facility or Death Row prison, just as they would normally. It's just that by paying the cost of their maintenance, the actual "Death" part of the Death Sentence is held in abeyance. If you stop paying, or if your check bounces, your pet Murderer gets the axe, immediately, so keep your checkbook balanced, Criminal-ophiles!! :rolleyes:

Now, the second part of this, and the reason why a ransomed convict would be the personal responsibility of a single, specific person, is that by paying for that Murderer to be allowed to live, you also accept FULL AND TOTAL RESPONSIBILITY AND LIABILITY for their actions from the moment you save him, onward for as long as you pay to keep him alive. If he kills in prison, it's on your head. If he escapes from prison, it's YOUR ass. If he conspires to have another person killed while behind bars, you are as guilty as he is. Remember, Society at large wanted to put this monster down, but you knew better! So, you'd better either be ready to be his cellmate, or you'd better be a damned good judge of character. :eek:

Just my thought...of course, my wife brought up a good point at another juncture in our discussion. As Mr. Jillette kept on haranguing about how Capital Punishment was the state-sponsored murder of a human being, she asked, "Yeah, but that type of guy isn't really human, now, is he?"

"My Gods," I thought "I picked a Keeper!" ;)
 
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