The Survival Enema

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retzius

retzius

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I was watching the new season of Man vs. Wild last night (I know), and Bear was stranded on a remote island off of Panama.

He was floating in the ocean on a raft, looking suitably fried by the sun and miserable, and he happened upon a pool of brown, rancid, bird poop infested fresh water.

He collects the water and although it is unsafe to drink he says "no problem, you can insert the fresh water into your anus and absorb the water through the colon and bypass the digestive system."

In true form, he hooks up a tube and proceeds to give himself an enema on a raft in the middle of the ocean... :barf:

I guess this might work.. although it might cause a whole host of other problems.. Anyone heard of this before?
 
retzius said:
I was watching the new season of Man vs. Wild last night (I know), and Bear was stranded on a remote island off of Panama.

He was floating in the ocean on a raft, looking suitably fried by the sun and miserable, and he happened upon a pool of brown, rancid, bird poop infested fresh water.

He collects the water and although it is unsafe to drink he says "no problem, you can insert the fresh water into your anus and absorb the water through the colon and bypass the digestive system."

In true form, he hooks up a tube and proceeds to give himself an enema on a raft in the middle of the ocean... :barf:

I guess this might work.. although it might cause a whole host of other problems.. Anyone heard of this before?
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Yeah. It bypasses the digestive system and enters the bloodstram directly.
That's how suppositories work.
Grilled Bareass should jump out of an airplane without a chute for his next event.
He'd probably land on his head and therefore, survive.
 
Heck, if you're alone on a raft, in the middle of the ocean, out of food and water, don't have an way to distill the seawater, you're already.......well, let's just say that little tube probably doesn't hurt too much:D
 
That was one of the most ridiculous things I have seen on that show, surpassed only by Bear swimming through underground caverns or going caving while trying to "survive".
 
I've read a little about it in a survival book. It's a last ditch effort to avoid death by dehydration.
I'd think introducing bacterium directly to your bloodstream would be a bad idea...but what do I know.
 
What an A-hole! I think he just ran out of extreme things to do, so the only thing left was to shove a unlubed, large diameter hose up his rear and pretend to hate the act.

In the Army, we learned about hydration through enema. I've never seen it done, or heard of anyone who actually did it. The instructors never said anything about using undrinkable, contaminated water.

I would think that if the water is too foul to drink, it's full of contaminates and other foul things that probably wouldn't be too good going directly into your bloodstream.
 
LOL thats even funnier to watch the second time :D

I would have loved to have been in the conference room when the producers explained the next show to Bear:

Producer: "Ok Bear, next youre gonna find some really dirty water and stick it up your ass"

Bear: "No problem, in the SAS we used to do that all the time. We would just lay back and think of England"

Producer: "I was just joking Bear."

Bear: "I dont just STAY alive. I AM alive. And nothing potrays this better than a mid-ocean enema. For England!!"
 
Man, that guy just get crazier by the season. Its as if the suits at Discovery put their heads together and say "What can we do to shock people more than last year??"

I still watch the show, but its not much about survival and more about grossing people out.

Dont know if a survival enema is a realistic thing, but id have to be pretty deperate before id even contemplate it.
 
I swear he thought this up after "PACKING IN A CASE OF BEER".....

I have heard of all the weird english schoolboy initiations, he must have been good buddies with that impeccably dressed and overly friendly Phs Ed teacher in school.
 
You can absorb a fair amount of fluid from enemas - one of the colon's jobs (performed primarily by the ascending colon) is to extract water from the liquid stool (if you didn't have a colon, you'ld have chronic diarrhea & become dehydrated very quickly). Would I use infected water? Not by choice. You could get a nasty case of colitis, which in a survival situation would be pretty bad.
 
KuRUpTD said:
For those of you who may of missed it :

[youtube]TtIG4TuVnvg[/youtube]
Click to expand...

:( That's a WTF moment.....


Bear-Grylls-man-vs-wild-542551_604_.jpg
 
A mate of mine had water worked up his arse in Cyprus after succumbing to heat. He's got a bit of a heat phobia now.
 
I'll try to locate it: There's a well-known ocean survival case in which the woman in the family was a nurse and used the technique with nasty water that had built up in the bottom of the family's life raft. As I recall, most of them survived but I can't recall whether any physicians attempted to analyze the role of the dirty water enemas.

DancesWithKnives
 
At that point, I'd probably just rather give in and die. Ain't too sure about eatin' raw sheep eyes and testacles either.

Professor.
 
DWK2 said:
I'll try to locate it: There's a well-known ocean survival case in which the woman in the family was a nurse and used the technique with nasty water that had built up in the bottom of the family's life raft. As I recall, most of them survived but I can't recall whether any physicians attempted to analyze the role of the dirty water enemas.

DancesWithKnives
Click to expand...

Is it the family that Grylls describe? The Robertsons?
 
There's something wrong with being alone and sticking a tube up your arse during sunset:jerkit:
 
Anyone seen the South Park where Cartman shoves food up his rectum and craps out of his mouth? This is basically an equivalent. There is a reason the first stop for intake in our digestive tract is a big sack of acid and enzymes.
 
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