- Joined
- Sep 21, 1999
- Messages
- 1,819
Good Evening.
It is I,
VAMPIRE GERBIL!
The place I live at, which for security reasons shall only be addresed in code form, Pahrumplestillskinland, New Nevada, has truly become a "Town/Unincorporated City/Burrough/....hell, now I don't even KNOW if it's a town or a city...
Well, whatever it is, it is a PLACE OF THE FUTURE!
Aside from the obvious fact that I, Vampire Gerbil, moved here and I certainly caused some people to think differently about things... such as I, Vampire Gerbil. The point I'm really getting at is the fact that we just got us a SUPER WAL-MART!!
(Hey, in this place, people were excited about having a second traffic light installed, and that's in a town/etc. that covers like 400 square miles! We actually cover more land than Las Vegas, Whoop! Whoop!! Whoop!!!)
So I went to this Wal-Mart place, all happy and stuff because now I don't have to drive to Vegas to buy me and the dogs socks, and I happily wandered into the Sporting Goods Section.
Well, apparently, Wal-Mart's headquartered in some liberal place, cuz they don't have handguns, and have only a few .22s, some hunting-type shotguns and rifles, and the occasional air pistol or rifle here or there.. mostly there though.
No drooling took place on my part, naturally.
Now then, I've finally managed to get some SLIGHT skill at sharpening knives by hand. Before, I used to rely on Spyderco's Sharpmaker cuz that's pretty much idiot-proof, even for me.
But I've lately been practicing my freehand sharpening, and while I have trimmed a couple of Ka-Bars into some miniscule Fighting Fileting Knives, I HAVE managed to get an edge.
But all those knife articles I read has the author saying something like, "After chopping through the 16th engine block at my local junkyard, the blade would no longer 'pop' the hair off my arm. A few passes with my E-Z Lap Diamond Sharpening {thingy - I forget if they called it a stone or not} it brought the blade back to its original hair popping abilities."
OK, Now I ain't gonna go into what these author's are shaving, cuz no matter what, they're gonna run outta armhair way too fast considering all those knives they test, but this got me and my head-goop thinking, "Hey, I oughta maybe get me one of those hair-popper-thingamabobbers, so at the STORE OF THE PRESENT FUTURE, I went ahead and got me one.
OK, now ya ready for the dumb part?
(That's right. Everything else that preceeded this was considered brilliant in my glob of goop that passes for a brain, located somewhere behind and above my face)
OK, now that I offered all that background, I think it's time I hit you with THE DUMB QUESTION, even for me.
The E-Zthing has two sides...well, ok, literally it has 6 sides, but even I can tell that you're not supposed to use the edges of it.... but there's a pretty abrasive side, one that faced "out" on the blister packed card it was displayed on, but what about the OTHER side that looks like some crudely finished metal?
Does that side have any purpose other than to reasure people of Vampire Gerbil's Theory f Revolutionary Thinking, i.e., That if something has a FRONT, it must have a BACK, {/endof i.e.,}or is that smooth and shiny side intended for stropping ot honing or something else, perhaps wallpaper decorating?
That was the question.
I'm sure that SOMEone here knows the answer to that. In fact, I'm fairly sure that I'm the ONLY one here that DOESN'T know the answer, but I couldn't ask any of the employees from FUTUREVILLE, cuz they all live in Pahrump... err.. Pahrumplestillskinland, I mean.
Feel free to answer below. I'd appreciate it.
Wondering how that thing would work on my molars
I remain,
VG
PS - By the way, if anyone that's reading this is gonna have a table at BLADE this week, be advised - I shall be there too! And I ain't shy about asking these questions in person, usually repeatedly.
The good news is that once in a while I wear pants when I ask.
It is I,
VAMPIRE GERBIL!
The place I live at, which for security reasons shall only be addresed in code form, Pahrumplestillskinland, New Nevada, has truly become a "Town/Unincorporated City/Burrough/....hell, now I don't even KNOW if it's a town or a city...
Well, whatever it is, it is a PLACE OF THE FUTURE!
Aside from the obvious fact that I, Vampire Gerbil, moved here and I certainly caused some people to think differently about things... such as I, Vampire Gerbil. The point I'm really getting at is the fact that we just got us a SUPER WAL-MART!!
(Hey, in this place, people were excited about having a second traffic light installed, and that's in a town/etc. that covers like 400 square miles! We actually cover more land than Las Vegas, Whoop! Whoop!! Whoop!!!)
So I went to this Wal-Mart place, all happy and stuff because now I don't have to drive to Vegas to buy me and the dogs socks, and I happily wandered into the Sporting Goods Section.
Well, apparently, Wal-Mart's headquartered in some liberal place, cuz they don't have handguns, and have only a few .22s, some hunting-type shotguns and rifles, and the occasional air pistol or rifle here or there.. mostly there though.
No drooling took place on my part, naturally.
Now then, I've finally managed to get some SLIGHT skill at sharpening knives by hand. Before, I used to rely on Spyderco's Sharpmaker cuz that's pretty much idiot-proof, even for me.
But I've lately been practicing my freehand sharpening, and while I have trimmed a couple of Ka-Bars into some miniscule Fighting Fileting Knives, I HAVE managed to get an edge.
But all those knife articles I read has the author saying something like, "After chopping through the 16th engine block at my local junkyard, the blade would no longer 'pop' the hair off my arm. A few passes with my E-Z Lap Diamond Sharpening {thingy - I forget if they called it a stone or not} it brought the blade back to its original hair popping abilities."
OK, Now I ain't gonna go into what these author's are shaving, cuz no matter what, they're gonna run outta armhair way too fast considering all those knives they test, but this got me and my head-goop thinking, "Hey, I oughta maybe get me one of those hair-popper-thingamabobbers, so at the STORE OF THE PRESENT FUTURE, I went ahead and got me one.
OK, now ya ready for the dumb part?
(That's right. Everything else that preceeded this was considered brilliant in my glob of goop that passes for a brain, located somewhere behind and above my face)
OK, now that I offered all that background, I think it's time I hit you with THE DUMB QUESTION, even for me.
The E-Zthing has two sides...well, ok, literally it has 6 sides, but even I can tell that you're not supposed to use the edges of it.... but there's a pretty abrasive side, one that faced "out" on the blister packed card it was displayed on, but what about the OTHER side that looks like some crudely finished metal?
Does that side have any purpose other than to reasure people of Vampire Gerbil's Theory f Revolutionary Thinking, i.e., That if something has a FRONT, it must have a BACK, {/endof i.e.,}or is that smooth and shiny side intended for stropping ot honing or something else, perhaps wallpaper decorating?
That was the question.
I'm sure that SOMEone here knows the answer to that. In fact, I'm fairly sure that I'm the ONLY one here that DOESN'T know the answer, but I couldn't ask any of the employees from FUTUREVILLE, cuz they all live in Pahrump... err.. Pahrumplestillskinland, I mean.
Feel free to answer below. I'd appreciate it.
Wondering how that thing would work on my molars
I remain,
VG
PS - By the way, if anyone that's reading this is gonna have a table at BLADE this week, be advised - I shall be there too! And I ain't shy about asking these questions in person, usually repeatedly.
The good news is that once in a while I wear pants when I ask.
