We need a KNIFE NAZI !!!

L

Lavan

Joined
Nov 8, 2000
Messages
2,301
Like in Seinfeld, someone on the forum who will yell, "NO KNIVES
FOR YOU!" whenever someone breaks protocol or uses a knife in any proscribed manner. Such as:

Using a custom knife for cutting.
Dropping a knife.
Using a kitchen electric sharpener.
Opening a letter with a knife. (LETTER OPENERS are for that)
Whittling with a tactical knife.
Using leather instead of Kydex.
Failure to open a folder with an elaborate flourish.
Using a "hunting" knife for fishing.
Dulling a knife.
Cutting slices off the newspaper. (SCISSORS SCISSORS)
Poking a knife at an imaginary foe.
Not oiling a folder hinge twice daily.
Describing anything even remotely Japanese with an English word.

etc etc etc. Help appreciated in adding to list of offenses.

:D
 
NO NO NO thats all wrong...yours suppose to use custom knives and to do all that you said is wrong:p
 
Yikes! I'm guilty with about 80% of the above! But then, that's why I bought my present EDC, a Strider folder. That, and because I'm a 'biker lifer knifer,' those things were going to happen anyway.

I dropped my AR. It was folded and it landed on carpeting.

I open letters with it all of the time. That's easily 75% of it's duty this month.

I 'trim out' newspaper articles for friends all of the time. I guess I'm too lazy to get up and get a scissors.

I routinely hand it to my wife, alias "the edge slayer," all of the time to open her UPS boxes.

I oil the hinge once per week, or every time it comes off of the Edgepro.

I once referred to the AR as 'ichiban.'

But, Mick said this stuff was okay.
 
Please add poking a Knife Nazi to your list which is what I'd like to do to any SOB that anal about knives trying to tell me what to use man's oldest tool for.

Hey, you also missed holding the blade on a Randall Model 1 to clean finger nails.
 
How about people who use Swiss Army Knives who are not, in fact, Swiss much less in the Swiss Army?

There ought to be a law.
 
I've got a Knife Nazi...I often times refer to her as Sweetheart-Honey-Angel-Muffin-Pumpkin-Love....

She took away all my knives (that she found) for two weeks once after I stuck myself in the thigh with a Balisong. (later found out it was NOT femoral, but boy howdy did that thing arc some blood!)
 
Well, I don't use an electric sharpener. Other than that, you gonna try to take my knives away all by your lonesome?
 
:(

Gollnick, Runs With Scissors....you guys got it.

You win the grand prize.

A file for honing Randalls and 3rd century Katanas. :D
 
I was going to say that the original post was tongue in cheek and pretty funny. You'd think people around here don't have a sense of humour.
 
Stupid knife joke:

Pommel - The butt-kicking someone gets when they mess with your girlfriend.

:)
 
Originally posted by Gollnick
How about people who use Swiss Army Knives who are not, in fact, Swiss much less in the Swiss Army?

There ought to be a law.
Click to expand...

A bunch of benevolent Swiss herdsmen charging at me with their brigade of corkscrew and toothpick wielding militia...ohhhhhh, I'm soooo scared! ;)
 
Yet another stupid knife joke:

Liner lock - Too many cruise ships in one place.

:)
 
well I guess Im guilty of half of those!!!...lol including using my own customs!!!
and whittling with my benchmade 721, and my avalanche!!!
:D
 
Well there goes all the fun of owning a knife I'll just give em' all away:( .

BTW I use an electric sharpener, it's a big rotating wet stone, I use it to reprofile blades, do axes, and machetes, whats wrong with that?

Like my old man used ta say,"right tool for the right job":D
 
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