What to do when your wife's bank account is SEVERLY overdrawn?

Status
Not open for further replies.

Walking Man

BANNED
Joined
May 28, 2003
Messages
9,606
Due to unemployment, my wife had a few checks not having the funds to cover them. While I am currently selling off some of my knives, I am wondering what we can to minimize fees, etc. I've never had to deal with an overdrawn bank account for more than a week, and I guess she owes over $800 now. I've been forced to pay all of the utilities and bill, which she would normally pay for (while I cover the mortage), so my cash flow is extremely limited as well.
Does anyone have any financial advise for a situation like this?
Thanks.
 
From the library get a copy of Financial Peace (or the book that followed it - the name of which I cant recall) by Dave Ramsey. www.daveramsey.com. Its good, basic stuff like budgeting, getting out of debt, etc. Highly recommended. Dave would tell you to get on a written budget, to eat beans and rice instead of the spendy stuff, sell everything that isnt tied down, and get an extra job or 3 to increase cash flow to get you thru this. All of this suffering (the beans and rice, selling your toys, etc.) is temporary to get you thru the hard times. Then when you are back on your feet, you work to get out of debt - including paying off the mortgage early - and build up 3-6 months of an emergency fund so that the next interruption in your income isn't so hard to deal with. Seriously - give this stuff a try. Mrs. Powernoodle and I are now 100% out of debt, and its the only way to live.

cheers
 
whew, hmm. I guess the first thing is to stop the hemmorage by not writing any more checks until that's cleared up.

Either get a short term loan or switch to cash exclusively until cashflow improves.
 
Ask for mercy from the bank. Go in, and talk to someone in person. Explain the situation and see if thay can waive some of the fees.
 
Divorce the woman now. Half of an $800 debt aint bad. But she keeps bouncing checks, you could be in for thousands and thousands of dollars, and your credit rating will be ruined.

Only half joking,
-Bob
 
Talk to the bank and ask for some of the fees to be waived but, first grab the credit cards and checkbooks and go all cash. It's time to go cash only.
 
ALWAYS contact your bank and creditors and let them know about your situation. They're often willing to work out something for you if they know what's going on, but they get VERY nervous if you simply avoid them.
 
FIRST, take the check book away from her. She should know how much money is in her book at all times and NEVER should be able to write a check without funds to cover.

Take her credit cards away too.

Go in the bank with her separation (from work) papers, plead with them to understand your wife was in denial and that you have taken the checkbook away from her. Tell them you will pay if back at x amount a week/bi weekly/ monthly, and ask them to help you out. They have all sorts of ways to make this work. If you and her have a good history, this sort of thing can be seen as an aberration and they may see fit to just drop the charges. They also may just have you sign a signature loan for the balance with the terms laid out, or they may just say, you got three months to get it back in shape or we have to post it to the credit bureau.
 
We're working on some of the ideas you've given us. Thanks. Any more info will be greatly appreciated. I love my wife, but I think she needs to grow up a bit. I'm not bailing her out, as I've told her. I'll help with some of the bills where I can, but I just can't afford everything.
BTW, she is working again, at a lower paying job, and she's looking into unemployment compensation to make up some of the difference because her last job paid fairly well..
 
They have all sorts of ways to make this work.

No, actually, they don't. Any bank of decent size is tied down to the computer system they use. There is a yes or no answer to almost any question, and very little room between that. They CAN refund the fees, but I highly doubt they can set up any type of payment plan or even freeze the account to allow you to pay back in payments. The systems usually track back to th 75th floor to their headquarters in a huge city outside of the state you're in run by CEO's who don't care about a average consumers overdraft fees.

I work at a bank, and even though they say they can't/won't refund the fees, they can.

If you guys have been good customers for a while and haven't had issues, a good manager will work with you. I do it all the time for our customers in extreme situations, such as yourself.

Threaten to close your accounts if they don't refund the fees. Worst they say is no, and you still owe $800. Ask for the branch manager, speak to him/her professionally, explain your situation and go from there. People who come to me demanding a refund get shuffled out of my office quickly. Just today I had a young man sit down and say "Here's the deal, I screwed up, I haven't before, I realize now I need to keep a check register, can you help me out?" He was honest and polite, so I did.

Give it a shot.
 
Actually they do have ways to work it out, they may say they do not, but managers have options and screens on the computers that are way different from what you see. My daughter works in a bank and she was hired by my best friend. The banking system is in the business to make money, period. it costs them far more to write something off and force you into court than it does to make some form of arrangements with you to set up a payment schedule.

The biggest thing is to NOT let them close the account, if you get the feeling they are going to do that, make sure YOU close it, that prevents them from putting your name on the delinquent listing that all banks look in to.

If you can get them to agree to a signature loan, take that option, it will actually build credit for you rather than losing your standing as a good risk, provided of course you pay it back on time.
 
i second the dave ramsey books
ive read every book this man has put out. he has great common sense ideas. that realy work! me and my wife follow his plan and have had great success. im going to school right now so she is providing our only income. we are living comfortably on less than 1500.00 a month and still have money we can save! good luck i hope some of this helps!
 
i am sorry about your predicament, but i think there is a bigger problem than the bounced checks here.

its the fact that you have "her" bills and "your" bills

if you are married, you are a team. unless she is a profligate spender it is not "her problem"...it is both of yours

the dave ramsey suggestion is a good one, while he can be a bit strident...his advice is sound and i recommend you listen to his show and read his financial peace book


the bank can waive the fees...the decision to do so is up to the bank and quite honestly it will come down to your personal relationship with the bank and whether or not they value your business. it is VERY important you cover the shortfall as quickly as possible
 
i am sorry about your predicament, but i think there is a bigger problem than the bounced checks here.

its the fact that you have "her" bills and "your" bills

if you are married, you are a team. unless she is a profligate spender it is not "her problem"...it is both of yours


Exactly.

'Her' predicament is also yours. It will affect your credit rating as well, unless your state keeps things like that seperate. As a married couple, you are just as responsible as she is for everything.

The sooner you two sit down and discuss your finances, and come to the realization that it is a partnrship, the less trouble you'll have in the future.
 
I'm not going to discuss this any further, because I pay far more in expenses than she does.
I've noticed recently that a few folks, older, I assume, who complain about their wives spending habits. If I bail her out now, then I believe I will only expect more of the same in the future. People have to take of their own problems, or they just don't learn.
I didn't ask for marital advise, but I still appreciate your concern. I don't want to turn this into a philosophical debate, so I won't respond to any further ideas that I should unconditionally bail my wife out. Yes, I am helping here and there, but I won't allow her to ignore this problem nor work to get both of us out of this problem. I told her I'd help her, but I won't if she doesn't work towards it, and take a leading role to get out of this.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top