What's the stupidest thing anybody ever did with your knife?

TorzJohnson

TorzJohnson

Joined
Aug 4, 2001
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Quoting Runs with Scissors' post in another thread: "I don't loan my knives out any more (learned this after a field supervisor ran the edge of my Sebenza straight down a brick wall)".

That got me to remembering my days back when I was a crew member on a Coast Guard cutter... Our Master Chief asked if he could look at my brand new Gerber Multiplier. He opened up the awl blade and carefully suspended my new toy between two fingers and let it fall directly on the linoleum covered steel deck plates - just to see what would happen. The blade cut through the linoleum pretty damn good, but failed to impress the deck plate and snapped off the tip nice and clean. I just wasn't fast enough to grab it away and knee him in the groin at the same time.

So what's your story?
 
A very good friend of mine stuck the blade of my MOD Ladyhawk in his Marijuana pipe (bowl). :rolleyes: I don't do pot. I never have. I took the knife away from him VERY quickly.
 
In the old days before one handed knives were available, I used to pinch my Buck 110 blade between thumb & forefinger pointed up & flip the handle down into my palm.
One of my co-workers saw this and asked to try it. I made the mistake of assuming he would have the point of the blade up & flip the handle down. WRONG !!! He had point down & flipped the handle out, away from his body & "flung" the now-opened knife across the room. Luckily, no one was hit.
I now never assume anyone has any knife smarts until proven otherwise and if asked for a blade, will ask what they want to cut & then show them how to open & close the blade & if ness. how to cut the item before handing it over.
 
This about caused the company I work at to ban all folders altogether!

I sharpened a Frost bolster lock folder for a friend at work, he showed it to another guy, now the knife is razor sharp now, for as long as that steel will keep it, but still very sharp. He opens the knife, about a 3 1/2" blade or so and tries to close it...Bolster lock is one where you slide the bolster to move the lock bar up and out of the blade lock area. Well he was PUSHING quite hard on the back of the blade while at the same time trying to PUSH the bolster to release the blade....guess what....he got her to free up and the blade was pushed quite fast once the blockage was removed! took off a good portion of the side of his thumb. I wasn't in the room at the time but heard about it from the owner of the knife. Too bad that the guy that did it was also the General Manager's son! Not a bright boy to say the least!!!

(the boy was let go later on and the father was also let go as well...)
We can still carry knives so I'm safe...
;)
G2
 
Several minutes after my L-UDT got here (last friday) my 14 year old brother wanted to fire it. He did and the knife jumped out of his hand and landed on ceramic tile ON THE TIP!!! That's the last time I'm letting him at one of my expensive knives again.
 
trying to sharpen a hotdog stick with the spine of my SOG x-ray vision and running the edge of a blade on my leatherman wave against a concrete slab. I feel bad for the guy with the very dull sebenza after it was rubbed aloung a brick wall!
Knifeman==>-----
 
This just happened TODAY! Everyone at work knows that I always have a knife handy. A female co-worker asked to borrow my knife, so I opened my Blackout and safely handed it to her. She then proceeded to open a case of dog food by cutting open the plastic casing. To do this, she ran the blade across the tops of eight steel cans! That's SIXTEEN edges! I almost messed my shorts! The blade survived just fine and we actually had a good laugh about it. Thank you Kershaw and Ken Onion!

RR
 
I served as best man for my younger brother. In gratitude, he gave me a CRKT K.I.S.S. Yes, it's got some limitations, but it's nice... and it is sharp. I was examining it when our older brother came into the room. "What's that?"

"It's a knife that Brian just gave me," I said handing it to him.

The very first thing he did was to just run his thumb right over the edge and slice it right through.
 
I was in a store to swap out a display. One of the young employees was trying to be helpful. A cable was secured with a nylon table tie. I got out my Victorinox Adventurer SAK with razor sharp locking 3.25" blade and said "let me cut it". He asked for the knife so that he could cut it.

I expected him to turn the blade edge-up, slip it in the loop of the cable tie, and lever it upwards (the way that I would have done it). Instead he reversed the knife and started to pull the blade into the loop with the edge and point towards his body. I was trying to moan "no!!" when the blade popped through the tie and into his left hand. He bled all over the place and went off to the emergency room.
 
Once a long time ago I let a friend look at my Buck 110. He promptly proceeded to jam the tip into a brick wall. I had to regrind the whole tip. On another occasion the brother of that guy took my Puma Hunter's Friend and ran his thumb along the edge, giving himself a nice cut. Not a bright family when it comes to knives.
 
Many years ago...
Just got a brand new Buck 112 Ranger. Left work, went to the store and came back to the block. Standing in the garden at my friends, hand him the (open) knife & he drops it onto the only patio tile in the entire garden...and it was a good 2' away from him!!!! :eek:
Bent the tip over:(
The next summer...
On the Grand Central Pky. when bro-in-law's AC compresser seizes. No problem, just cut off the belt and we're good to go...
"Gimme your knife" sez he...
"You got your own" sez me...
"But yours is sharp"
Needless to say I cut the belt ;)
Ebbtide out.
 
Well because I use a knife at work as a case cutter and three of us work to gether the wharncliff that Taz made me get to see alot of cans...To hard for the other guys to understand to cut the plastic down on the box and not on the cans.

Friend watched me flip my #007 red slabbed REKAT SIFU out and asked if he could look at it..I closed it and handed it him ..He goes into this Karate kid pose and tries to snap it open...you guessed it...flying right out and onto the tip...Was pissed even though you could barely see the damage..

and last but not least...The day I received my custom Alan Folts I took it to work to show a fellow knife knut...Another friend asks to look and and I tell him no prob jus be careful it's sharp and please dont drop it..He looks at it for several seconds then takes a chop at a box with it...He got sh*t jobs all night for being a idiot..
 
A friend of mine wanted to try out my Gunting and *swoosh* one kinetic opening later: "Cool, this is like a surgical instrument. It cut right trough my trousers".

After that incident I decided that it would be THE knife that I let people play with. A very fast way to let people teach themselves not to play with knives. The slope on that learning curve has to be logarithmic. :D

/Colinz (not really that evil)
 
With my kershaw/onion black out, I explained to him how to safely open it withough slicing your thumb open.

So I hand him the closed black out (with an edge so sharp, it scares the hairs off your arm before it even get's a chance to touch them).

What does he do? the exact opposite of what I tell him. He said he didn't pay attention to what I was saying.

And of course who has to drive him to the emercney room cuase he has this freaking huge gash on his thumb. Yep, me. I made him buy dinner that night for beign too damn stupid.
 
Was at a Jack and Jill shower for my honey's daughter, after "liberal"
amounts of beer,I decided to show my knife handling skills. as a balloon went floating by I lept out of my chair, drew my emerson and proceeded to attempt to cut the attached ribbon, well I got the ribbon
and the forward motion continued until it cut into the webbing between my thumb and forefinger (ouch) and of course we all know that alcohal thins the blood..................I think you can guess the rest of the story :D
I don't lend my knives out so of course I only do stupid things with them
 
Let's see, I have so many of these stories. First, was in high school. One of my so called friends asked to borrow my pocketknife(really old Camillus stockman from my Grandpa); next thing I know, he is handing my knife back in two pieces. Yes, the dumbass used the main blade to pry open somebodies locker!
Next, we have my Brother in law. Typical non knife dumbass also. Once upon a time, I had a nice collection of Puma knives. One such piece was a large folding hunter. My Brother in law picks up this knife and proceeds to drop it point first onto the floor. Carpet on top of concrete does not help cushion impacts much, I will tell you. Yep, curled the tip completely over. Never have forgiven him for that one. Any collector's value went right out the window. I think I ended up grinding the bent tip off and selling it as user. Nope, dumbass never offered to pay for the damage.
Next, we have my Stepson. Up until he went into the Marine Corps a couple of years ago, he had a partying problem. We wont go into too many specifics, but I still have what once was a mint condition Hen & Rooster folder(the one AG Russell sells for almost $200) that was used as some kind of prybar, since it wont close properly and has about a 1/4" of blade play now. This once pristine collectable also has a lot of strange black resin like substance all over the blade. Most likely bong or pipe resin, but since I have no knowledge ;) of that, I can only speculate. ;)
 
I handed my Bladeforums red G-10 Sifu to a friend at work and he tried to flick it open. It flew out of his hand and slid across the floor until it came to rest, under a fork lift.
I was very lucky that the Sifu only had a couple of minor scuff spots on the blade, tough knife!
I actually blame myself for that one and learned my lesson about handing non-knife folks any of my knives.
:rolleyes:
 
Most often people will ask to borrow my foldingknife or use one of my kitchenknives. I usually warn them that the knife is very sharp. They say "ok" and within 30 seconds have cut themselves, whereupon they complain that the knife is "to sharp" and that it is dangerous to use.

Many, many years ago a pal was admiring my brand new Gerber Command 1. For some reason he wanted to make it stick in the wooden floor and threw it hard, point first. Of course he hit the only nail visible in the floor for miles around and broke the tip.

Nowadays, if I can help it, I will only let people who are not complete morons handle my knives.


Regards Jan
 
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