Stacy E. Apelt - Bladesmith
ilmarinen - MODERATOR
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Knifemaker / Craftsman / Service Provider
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2004
- Messages
- 37,919
To many of us, the Count....12345678910.....is an enigma. Appearing with his sage advice, and disappearing like a ghost. I thought I would tell you a bit about him:
Why The Count is the most interesting man on Bladeforums:
The Count is dynamic figure, often seen scaling glacier walls and carving The Last Supper in the ice. He has been known to remodel train stations on his lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. He translates ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, He writes award-winning operas, he manages his time so efficiently his day only has 23 hours in it.
Occasionally, The Count treads water for three days in a row.
He woos women with his sensuous and godlike trombone playing, and can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed. He cooks Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. He is an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, he once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. He plays bluegrass cello, was scouted by the Mets, and has been the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, He builds large suspension bridges in his back yard. He enjoys urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after mentoring homeless children at the local shelter, he repairs electrical appliances free of charge.
He is an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless jai alai player.
Critics worldwide swooned over his original line of corduroy evening wear.
He doesnt perspire.
Although he is a private citizen, he receives fan mail. He has been caller number nine twice. Last summer he toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. He bats 400.
His deft floral arrangements have earned him fame in international botany circles.
Children trust Him.
He can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. He once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. He knows the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. He has performed several covert operations with the CIA.
He only sleeps once a week: when He does sleep, he sleeps in a chair.
While on vacation in Canada, He successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.
The laws of physics do not apply to him.
He balances, weaves, dodges, frolics, and his bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, He participates in full-contact origami. Years ago The Count discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. He has made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven.
He breeds prizewinning clams, has won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin.
The Count has played Hamlet, has performed open-heart surgery, and has spoken with Elvis.....recently.
Truly, The Count is the most interesting man on Bladeforums.
Why The Count is the most interesting man on Bladeforums:
The Count is dynamic figure, often seen scaling glacier walls and carving The Last Supper in the ice. He has been known to remodel train stations on his lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. He translates ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, He writes award-winning operas, he manages his time so efficiently his day only has 23 hours in it.
Occasionally, The Count treads water for three days in a row.
He woos women with his sensuous and godlike trombone playing, and can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed. He cooks Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. He is an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, he once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. He plays bluegrass cello, was scouted by the Mets, and has been the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, He builds large suspension bridges in his back yard. He enjoys urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after mentoring homeless children at the local shelter, he repairs electrical appliances free of charge.
He is an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless jai alai player.
Critics worldwide swooned over his original line of corduroy evening wear.
He doesnt perspire.
Although he is a private citizen, he receives fan mail. He has been caller number nine twice. Last summer he toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. He bats 400.
His deft floral arrangements have earned him fame in international botany circles.
Children trust Him.
He can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. He once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. He knows the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. He has performed several covert operations with the CIA.
He only sleeps once a week: when He does sleep, he sleeps in a chair.
While on vacation in Canada, He successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.
The laws of physics do not apply to him.
He balances, weaves, dodges, frolics, and his bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, He participates in full-contact origami. Years ago The Count discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. He has made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven.
He breeds prizewinning clams, has won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin.
The Count has played Hamlet, has performed open-heart surgery, and has spoken with Elvis.....recently.
Truly, The Count is the most interesting man on Bladeforums.
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