Just for fun, ever consider a Bunting?
I had a much better video than the one at the bottom of this post but I can't lay hands on it so I'll supplement the Clarkson one with this:
From The Annals of Gluttony: The Ortolan
by Teddy Bergman
"This column will look at issues of Gluttony, the sin most salient to the readership of this blog and gastronomes throughout history and the world. It will range from current issues like Burger King's Meat Lover's Sandwich (whose famous promise of "meat on top of meat on top of meat" reads more like Larry Craig's weekend plans) to issues of a more historical focus like today's topic.
At the semi-ripe age of 79, Francois Mitterrand, France's longest serving president, was in the last stages of his losing battle with cancer. A great glutton, known for his numerous adulterous affairs and at least one bastard child, Mitterrand decided to hold a grand final dinner for 30 of his nearest and dearest. The menu apparently included Foie Gras, Oysters, and finally a spate of roasted two ounce ORTOLANS - the now illegal to eat bird and the ultimate glutton's delight.
The Ortolan, Emberiza Hortulana, is a small song bird (similar to a finch) found in the forests of France. The capture and preparation of this delicacy is particularly romantic in its barbarism. The birds are caught in nets and quickly blinded or put in a dark box for an extended period of time. This sightlessness apparently disrupts the bird's biorhythms in such a way as to cause it to gorge itself on the ample grain and millet provided by its captors. When the bird has fattened to four times its natural size it is promptly drowned in ARMAGNAC. Yes that's right. Armagnac. The bird is promptly plucked and roasted plain for five minutes.
The eater covers her head and face with a napkin both to keep the precious aromas close and to hide these doings from God. The eater then takes the still piping hot bird and puts it on her tongue; quickly panting to cool it and allow the ambrosial fat to run down her throat. Keeping the whole Ortolan in her mouth, the eater allows the beak or head to protrude through her lips before she promptly bites it off. Then you eat the bird whole, bones et all. People describe the progression of flavors as:
1. An orgasmic layer of crisp skin, supple meat and euphoric fat.
2. The bitter bite of the giblets.
3. The "Freshen Up Gum"-like surprise of biting into the pea sized lungs and being rewarded with a splash of Armagnac.
4. The crunch of the small bones which lacerate the gums in your mouth, producing an intoxicating blend of bird mash and human blood.
Some people claim they can taste the entire life of the bird in flavors ranging from Moroccan Wheat and the Mediterranean breeze to the lavender of Provence. That sounds like total horseshit to me, though the picture of Mitterrand's family sitting around a dinner table, faces shrouded like so many Klansmen, munching away on tiny birds, is priceless. Finally, as we saw, eating one Ortolan is considered sinful enough to hide from God, and Mitterrand, bless his sick fucking heart, ate two."
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=8y4MS7mSzX8