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1 more question about women
- Thread starter Vermont woodsman
- Start date
This is a very complicated matter......just give the girls in the library a try, rather than the ones in the bar.....they may surprise you.
My first gf came from a broken family....she had her good points but was in the end not good for me. Lots of sex but no trust and commitment(the sex makes up for a bad relationship)
My wife comes from a very stable family(although it had its problems)....just a bit less sex, lots of trust and committment.
For women, I believe they can be affected emotionally more than men by bad family enviroments. Even if it doesn't make their character bad, it causes all sorts of unresolved issued in their psyche that will come up to disturb your happy relationship later on.
My wife was abused badly as child by a relative(the breaking fingers kind of abuse) but it was never exposed, and she resents her parents for not protecting her from this clown(whose legs I offered to break for her), but she has never talked to her parents about it.....this sort of little crap can mess up a girl's mind in all sorts of little ways sometimes.
One of the positive ways was that it drove my wife to be the ultra-in-control sort, who will always be the top girl in school, she got near the top for the whole English Bar last time while I barely scraped through.
As boyfriend, you'll have to deal with all this crap that your gal will have, cause you have to take care of her.
That's why, even though the girl may have an intrinsically good character, a broken background may cause all sorts of problems you have to handle.....
Love's complicated, ain't it?
My first gf came from a broken family....she had her good points but was in the end not good for me. Lots of sex but no trust and commitment(the sex makes up for a bad relationship)
My wife comes from a very stable family(although it had its problems)....just a bit less sex, lots of trust and committment.
For women, I believe they can be affected emotionally more than men by bad family enviroments. Even if it doesn't make their character bad, it causes all sorts of unresolved issued in their psyche that will come up to disturb your happy relationship later on.
My wife was abused badly as child by a relative(the breaking fingers kind of abuse) but it was never exposed, and she resents her parents for not protecting her from this clown(whose legs I offered to break for her), but she has never talked to her parents about it.....this sort of little crap can mess up a girl's mind in all sorts of little ways sometimes.
One of the positive ways was that it drove my wife to be the ultra-in-control sort, who will always be the top girl in school, she got near the top for the whole English Bar last time while I barely scraped through.
As boyfriend, you'll have to deal with all this crap that your gal will have, cause you have to take care of her.
That's why, even though the girl may have an intrinsically good character, a broken background may cause all sorts of problems you have to handle.....
Love's complicated, ain't it?
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2002
- Messages
- 2,490
So, basically our collective thoughts amount to: Each person is different, and how we are affected by our pasts projects itself in different ways unique to the individual. Right?
Give people a chance. They may surprise you, they may hurt you, they may make you wonder what you ever did without them... But you will never know if you don't allow yourself the chance to know them.
I also believe in the old saying, cheesy as it sounds, that "whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" but only if you are strong to begin with. Some people can bend and bend and then eventually flip back forcefully in the other direction, while others will just break.
~ashes
Give people a chance. They may surprise you, they may hurt you, they may make you wonder what you ever did without them... But you will never know if you don't allow yourself the chance to know them.
I also believe in the old saying, cheesy as it sounds, that "whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" but only if you are strong to begin with. Some people can bend and bend and then eventually flip back forcefully in the other direction, while others will just break.
~ashes
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2001
- Messages
- 1,294
The worst offenders, in my opinion, are the women who get knocked up and marry thier High School or college sweetheart - only to divorce ten or fifteen years down the road because once single they invariably feel as though they've missed out on something and try to make up for lost time. One such woman I know is in her mid-thirties and has two children, yet she behaves like a drunken sorority girl. She prefers to sleep with twenty-something guys and if she doesn't get to go out clubbing on Friday or Saturday night she gets all depressed as though she's missing out. Un-freakin'-believable.
Oh, did I mention she's constantly complaining about being phucked and chucked? Gee, I wonder why...
Oh, did I mention she's constantly complaining about being phucked and chucked? Gee, I wonder why...