Absolute BUNK

James_Terrio

James_Terrio

Joined
Oct 6, 2008
Messages
4,076
Have you ever had someone try really hard to sell you a piece of complete BUNK? Junk doesn't count, overpriced doesn't count, it has to BOTH over-priced AND complete junk to qualify for this thread :D

This is a light-hearted question; I'm asking you fellas to share silly, ridiculous or just plain dumb stories you've heard in your knife-owning/collecting/making careers. This isn't a "good/bad/ugly" type thread, so no need to post names or even prove what you say :D Just stories that will make us shake our heads and chuckle.

I would like to share a story about a bunk knife I saw at a gun show a couple seasons ago. Now, I am no expert, but I couldn't believe what this guy was trying to pass off...

First off, when I walked up to his table he was on his cell, arguing loudly with a customer about monies owed... the seller owed the customer... I backed off till he was done with his call, but it seemed a bit unprofessional.

Anyway, my girl at the time wanted to look at some derringers he had, and there was an ivory(?)-handled damascus bowie on his table I wanted to peruse. It was kinda/sorta shaped like the Moran fighter outlined in "How to Make Knives", except full-tang. The pattern in the steel was extremely bold with almost pure black, and pure white layers. So I asked the seller if I could inspect it. He told me yes, he had forged it himself, gave me permission to handle it, was polite, and mentioned that he appreciated me asking first. This all seems reasonable :) He said giddily that the blade "would dance before my eyes when viewed in the light of a campfire." :rolleyes:

OK, that's where the romance ends and the ummm... stuff-that-rolls-downhill began to flow. There was a divot out of the edge nearly 1/8" deep and as wide as my pinky fingernail. That's a huge failure in my estimation. I asked him what happened... "Well, this is the fourth time I've sold this knife and bought it back"

WHAT?

Yeah, really, that's what he said. He offered no explanation for why the blade had failed or if he even tried to correct the problem.

Upon further inspection, I noticed gaps between both sides of the tang and the scales; I mean, you could read a line of newsprint through these gaps. I questioned that and he said "Oh, that's no problem, I'll just re-clamp it and it'll be fine for a while."

WHAT?

All right, so now I'm thinkin' to myself, 'what's goin' on here' and ask him what the blade steel is... he told me, with great pride, that it was iron pipe salvaged from a plumbing job, with a "piece of nickel" stuffed in the middle, forge-welded and folded etc etc.

Well, now it all starts making sense, there's no actual STEEL in the darn thing, no wonder it SUCKS and got returned FOUR times :foot:

Anyway, the fella was real gung-ho, and tried like heck to get me to buy the thing for FIVE hundred dollars. Even though he just told me it's broken, made of crapola and has been returned by everyone who ever had the misfortune to lay cash down for it. Rather than argue with him, I excused myself, and went off and bought a Camillus USAF knife (just because I heard they weren't making them anymore) and a couple old knife-buyers-guides for like $50 total.

SO! Y'all got any just-plain-crazy, I-can't-believe-this-idiot-expects-me-to-take-him-seriously type experiences to share for a laugh? Bring 'em on!

P.S. sorry to take up space with this; I'd put it in Around the Grinder but I haven't ponied up for a knifemaker membership yet. :p
 
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I'm going to buy an Enco drill press tonight - I'm hoping it's not junk, but will probably end up rolling the dice on it some unless the flaws are pretty big.
 
I was collecting folding sailor knives for a while and decided to top off my collection with a pre 1900 Joseph and Rodges knife with Stag scales. Upon inspection I found the antique to have plastic scales, note, hollow blow molded plastic scales that looked like stag only to have the sell explain how there were popular in the late 1800's. I tried to pass on the sale politely only to have the seller tell me what a fool I was not to purchase such a rare knife at such a resonable price, over $400, which I would have paid for the real thing.
 
This one is fairly amusing. Everybody in my shop knows that I am a knifemaker. So, a few months ago one of my co workers is going around trying to sell a bunch of frost cutlery stuff. My opinion of the stuff is not very high. So, this guy KNOWS the level of knives that I have purchased and also the level of the knives I produce, yet he still badgered me for close to 15min. I look at him and say "Honestly, WTF do you expect me to do with this? You know what easy sharpening means? Easy dulling!!" He then proceded to get drunk at a hurricane party and stab hisself square in the thigh with one of those slippies. HA!!:D
 
I was at a costume store before Halloween. They had some costume swords. Very very overpriced costume swords. When I see a price of 400 to 500 dollars on a sword, I at least expect it to be actual carbon steel, heat treatable steel. This junk was some scrap steel, almost like cast iron. Some rough fit soft wood handle (like pine), and loose fittings. It was not even a pretty wall hanger. Just plain ugly. They guy sees me looking at it on the wall, and pulls it down, handing it to me, and whispers reverently "it is hand forged, and real! You could chop a car in half with this". I just grinned and handed it back to him. My first thought was "only a butter car, and a warm one at that"
 
I met someone who was a knifemaker of sorts. When he found out I made knives, he went and got a piece of brass about 10 inches square. Except, he didnt call it brass. He said that it was a mystery metal that has been tested by scientists and no one could tell exactly what it is. He also said that it was on the first moon mission. I am not sure if this story fits into the category, because he gave it to me. I used a piece of it on a knife, and it cuts like brass, drills like brass, sands like brass, oxidizes like brass, so it must be a mystery metal. I think I still have some if someone wants to purchase some of it, it will probably be very expensive, so pull out your checkbooks! :)
 
Have you ever had someone try really hard to sell you a piece of complete BUNK? Junk doesn't count, overpriced doesn't count, it has to BOTH over-priced AND complete junk to qualify for this thread
Click to expand...

Yup! That's how I ended up with my first wife. Definitely got sold low quality bunk.
 
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I was trolling for bargains at a big monthly flea market near Rutledge, MO. I stopped at a stand that displayed quite a few junk import knives and some of what looked like first attempts of someone making knives.

The knives the fella was pushing was supposed to be some his "best pal" made and the knives "were exceptional". Thing was, the knives "his pal made" were about the worst I have seen, and I could tell the rough blades were mild steel.

The stand owner couldn't tell me what steel the knives were made of, nor any other info on the knives. I know steel and was sure the knives were simply ground mild steel and not even of good enough steel to HT. I easily rolled the edge of of one of the knives on a nail when the guy was busy hawking his sorry wares to a potential sucker.

The rough scales were roughly riveted with what looked to be nails used as rivets. The brass guards must have been fit with a chisle.

The hawker was demanding $75 for the "bargain" price of the knives.
 
This brings to mind something I experienced a number of years ago at a major knife show. A friend and I had sold out, and were walking around the show. We noticed one table holder who was loud and boisterous....couldn't help but notice him. There were about 6-7 people standing at his table, and he was laying it on thick and heavy. The sale pitch was for "The best elk knife ever created"! Now, this individual lives in an area where there are NO elk, and I happened to know the individual wasn't even a hunter..... He went on and on....and to be honest it was somewhat embarrassing to see another knifemaker acting like that. He made all kinds of extravagant claims, and if he ever goes under as a knifemaker, he has a bright future as a used car salesman. The funny part was that once the people cleared, my friend walked right up to the table, called the guy by name and said..... "That must be the best elk knife in the world, because you decimated the elk heard in XXXX! (XXXX=the makers home state).
 
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Hey, if they can "import" elk from Montana to Kentucky....:eek: I wouldn't put it past someone to import wildebeest to Wisconsin. :p

I remember that incident I mentioned because the guy was so obviously full of "Bunk".
 
I remember seeing these "titanium" kitchen knives on TV awhile back.

"They slice, they dice, and they're SOLID TITANIUMMMM!"

Lol @ titanium being soft and sucking as a knife steel in reality.

The average Jane or Joe doesn't know this....they're like "oooh titanium!" *buy*
 
Last gun show I was at there was a fellow who had some dirtied up "cold steel" 1860 Naval cutlass, He was trying to pass off as antiques.
 
One of my brother's former coworkers paid $500 for a crappy stainless wall hanger katana in the belief that it was the "real deal". It had a crappy acid etch "hamon", no kissaki, and its edge was very screwy. For starters it wasn't even convex.
 
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