Advice please.

oupa

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What do I do?
“Tom” lists a knife for sale or trade and as it is one that I really want, I offer him a choice of knives for his knife.
I also mention that he can choose more than one for his knife.
He tells me that he really likes the one custom of mine, but I would have to add some cash.
In reply I make him aware that I cannot add cash to my offer.
He knocks me back and I accept his decision in good humour.
In the meantime a fellow formite “Harry” offers me a very nice knife for the same knife.
Before I can respond, “Tom” contacts me and says he has changed his mind and wants to do a straight trade.
I tell him that I have had a good offer and ask if he is sure he wants to make the trade.
He responds that it is my lucky day and he wants to trade.
I thus knock Harry back and I ship the knife to Tom.
He received my knife yesterday and cannot fault it.
He does however want me to return his knife as he feels the knife I sent him is not of equal value.
However, he was well aware of the situation as I had initially offered him a choice of knives and stated that he was free to choose more than one as my knives were not as expensive as his – I was quite open about the value of my knives.
So today, I asked him to choose an additional knife, but he is not interested.
(Better trade in the wind?)
I have now lost out on the trade with “Harry” and I really love the knife I received from Tom.
Is the deal only concluded when both parties are satisfied, or can one party just drop out because he had a better offer or a change of mind?
So my friends, what do I do?
Dirk
Edited because my spelling is not the best!
 
"Is the deal only concluded when both parties are satisfied, or can one party just drop out because he had a better offer or a change of mind?"

This probably isn't what you want to hear but I would return his knife since "Tom" is not satisfied with the deal. It does sound a bit like he got a better offer after starting his deal with you but that is beyond your control. I would in the future not deal with "Tom" if I were in your shoes and chalk this one up to a lesson learned.
 
It sucks, but yeah, send his knife back.

In this case, since he just "changed his mind," I'd expect him to refund your shipping, especially if it's more than a couple bucks -- the initial shipping AND what it costs to ship it back. It's solely his fault the trade didn't work, and you shouldn't have to lose anything because of his buyer's remorse.

And certainly don't deal with him again.
 
Sorry Oupa but I think you know already what you should do.

A deal is not a deal until both parties are happy.
 
I have always honoured my word.
When I have agreed to a deal and the goods I receive are as described, I do not back out.
I deliver what I undertook to do and lived with the deals that I am sorry I made.
Sadly not everybody lives by these principals.
If the knife I offered was in any way defective, I would not have been at all upset, but when a person stuffs me around because he/she cannot live with his/her decisions, I get angry.
I will return the man's knife.
I am cured of trading for a while.:mad:
Dirk
 
oupa please try not to let it bother you to much.I have had this happen and I just sent it back and went on.The next trade was great.
 
Both parties must be happy before a deal can close. Send him the knife back.

I'll have to agree with JamesA as well. He needs to refund your shipping costs both ways.

I sure hope you don't let this kind of thing ruin your trading here.

Someone else will want your knife, and hell, you may even get a better deal!

Good luck.
 
Send his knife back because you are a man of honor.However;I agree with you that if knife was defective or condition was not what he expected etc that would be more acceptable,cause now you are out the other trade in addition to losing the knife you like from this formite.If I send party "a" a Benchmade 42 in trade party "B"'s custom Erickson Balisong and he accepts trade and then changes his mind later because of a difference in value,my thinking is he should have thought that out long and hard before making a deal.To me in this case maybe the other formites integrity is tarnished because this just sounds like buyers remorse.Then again he could have just given you a bs excuse about cond. etc ya know to get around the whole trade.Sorry for your unfortunate situation.good luck
 
I'm over it.
Nothing a good night's sleep could not cure!:D
Dirk
 
A deal's not a deal until everyone is happy. No reasons, no excuses, no explanations needed. Send the knives back to each other. But, you messed up on one item of terminology:

In the meantime a fellow formite “Harry” offers me a very nice knife for the same knife.
Before I can respond, “Tom” contacts me and says he has changed his mind and wants to do a straight trade.
I tell him that I have had a good offer and ask if he is sure he wants to make the trade.
He responds that it is my lucky day and he wants to trade.
I thus knock Harry back and I ship the knife to Tom.


Tom is really a Dick.
 
Esav, I think what really pushed up my blood pressure was the way he went about it.
Initially, my offer was rejected out of hand – no problem.
I then get an enquiry wanting pictures, information, the name of my wife’s gynaecologist and the projected lifespan of the outer-Mongolian fruit fly.
He decides against the deal – no problem.
I get chatting to a friend and he wants my knife.
Out of the blue, this character returns and wants the knife.
I ask him if he is positive, as I have a trade offer from a friend.
No problem he says, lets do it.
After I ship the knife, he bails out.
Not because my knife is not as describes, but out of remorse for his actions.
The price difference was something like $50.
If I had stuffed someone around to this extent and stood to potentially lose $50, I would have just moved on.
I ask you $50? – You and I and most other knife lovers have given away knives that cost more.
To add insult to injury, he now wants me to confirm return shipment before he sends my knife back.
This guy is so low, the temptation to refuse lingers in the back of my mind.:mad:
He is a ratbag in my eyes.
Dirk
 
what exactly does the confirm return shipment mean? If it means you send first then me, I wouldn't do it. If anything you should get yours back first, but the ideal is to ship at the same time. I agree that "Tom" is a grade A horse's Ass. Please don't let it sour you to the folks here. That is not indicative of a normal Bladeforums trade.
Good luck
 
Mate, I have given up on this bloke.
It has not soured my opinion of knife addicts in general.
I am also not going to name him.
If one looks at the majority of disagreements posted here, it almost always degenerates into a "I said and then you said" session.
In the end there are only loosers.
Many times, good men's names are ternished by the "Toms" of the world.
Dirk
 
Originally posted by oupa
To add insult to injury, he now wants me to confirm return shipment before he sends my knife back.
This guy is so low, the temptation to refuse lingers in the back of my mind.:mad:
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ... no no no ... don't refuse ... send him his knife back ... after you get yours from him!

Tell him he can have his knife back and the deal reversed the day you receive yours back first from him. His behavior has been so unreliable up until now that you .. don't .. have .. to .. trust .. him .. any .. longer.
 
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