Advice wanted about seller community standards

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killgar

Knifemaker / Craftsman / Service Provider
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I'm new to selling knives on Bladeforums, so I don't know what the community standards are. I have a situation and I'd appreciate some advice.

Here's the story-

A member contacted my on Monday asking if I would sell him a knife. I had not posted the knife for sale or solicited for offers. But the member had a good feedback rating, and I was willing to sell the knife, so I gave him a price.

He accepted the price, I considered it a deal. We exchanged personal info, and I got him a shipping quote. I requested payment in the form of a money order, and he said that he would try to get one the next day.

That was on Monday, and I haven't heard from him since. Not a word. And I have turned down other buyers since Monday because I had made the deal with this member. I sent him a message yesterday morning asking him if he still wanted it, and telling him that I had turned down other buyers, but still no response. And he has been active on the forum since Monday.

Now I'm a patient guy, and I know that things can come up in peoples lives that would make a knife deal a lot less important, but there's a limit.

So my question is, how long should I have to wait to hear from a "buyer" once a deal is made before I can cancel the deal and sell to someone else without being the bad guy?

I'm not going to name the member, because I don't think there is any malicious intent on his part. I don't want to cause him any trouble. And I'm not looking to start drama.
 
Not sure why you are getting all these offers on something not for sale, but to answer your ?. How long you wait is up to you, but since he has neither sent your payment, nor responded, it is reasonable to move on. I would send him a message you are doing so(though you can wait if you like). For a money order I do allow some extra time, as it can be inconvenant for some, but they should keep in contact.
 
ratstuph said:
You might choose to send him a message with a time-limit in it for contact, after which you will move on.
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Agreed, this is what I'd do. From the sound of it you've been more than generous already.

As a seller I expect payment shortly after contact has been established (PM, email, whatever), and as I buyer I pay promptly; IMO that's how things should be done.
 
Thanks everyone. I'm seeing a consensus here, and that's what I was looking for.

I'm not desperate to sell or upset at the guy about the possibility of missing out on another sale while I was waiting. And I didn't mind giving him some extra time. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt whenever possible. I'll give him a "courtesy message" that I'm moving on.

Thanks again for all the advice.
 
killgar said:
I'm not going to name the member, because I don't think there is any malicious intent on his part. I don't want to cause him any trouble. And I'm not looking to start drama.
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Not asking you to out him, but you are too nice/patient. Of course it is malicous: he either pays and tells you he sent the MO, ideally trackable, or he gives you an ETA for when he will and asks if OK with you, or he steps back, and communicates accordingly. He really has only these three options to remain in good standing, IMO. Ghosting a waiting seller for a week is not OK.
 
ferider said:
Not asking you to out him, but you are too nice/patient. Of course it is malicous: he either pays and tells you he sent the MO, ideally trackable, or he gives you an ETA for when he will and asks if OK with you, or he steps back, and communicates accordingly. He really has only these three options to remain in good standing, IMO. Ghosting a waiting seller for a week is not OK.
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I appreciate your post, along with all the others.

Believe me, I can be a hard case when I need to be.

But like I said, I'm not desperate to sell (not depending on the proceeds to pay bills, feed family, buy another knife, etc).

And I'm not worried about missing out on other sale opportunities. There are people waiting to buy as soon as I have knives available.

And last but not least, I have zero exposure in this. It's not like I shipped the knife in advance and am waiting on payment. And I haven't spent any money in the matter.

It's easy for me to be excessively patient and give people the benefit of the doubt when I have absolutely nothing to lose (like knife or money. I don't count time. I've got plenty of time). But of course, I have my limits (hence, the reason I started this thread).

But I see your points. And again, I appreciate your advice and opinions, and I will keep them in mind as I continue to sell on this forum. :)
 
Lone Wolfe's rules for dealing with someone you PM'ed about a knife. (or anyone else, for that matter)

1. Ask very politely if the person would be interested in selling xxxxxxx, and if so, how much would they want.
2. Take No for an answer if that's what's given, thank them for the response.
3. Don't try to beat them out of every dollar, since you're the one who asked them to sell.
4. Thank them politely if a deal can't be reached.
5. Pay promptly if a deal is struck, notify seller that payment has been sent.
6. Thank them graciously for selling you something they might not have otherwise ever sold.
7. Enjoy your new pretty. (You didn't PM them to sell it to you solely to flip it, did you?)
 
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killgar said:
I appreciate your post, along with all the others.

Believe me, I can be a hard case when I need to be.

But like I said, I'm not desperate to sell (not depending on the proceeds to pay bills, feed family, buy another knife, etc).

And I'm not worried about missing out on other sale opportunities. There are people waiting to buy as soon as I have knives available.

And last but not least, I have zero exposure in this. It's not like I shipped the knife in advance and am waiting on payment. And I haven't spent any money in the matter.

It's easy for me to be excessively patient and give people the benefit of the doubt when I have absolutely nothing to lose (like knife or money. I don't count time. I've got plenty of time). But of course, I have my limits (hence, the reason I started this thread).

But I see your points. And again, I appreciate your advice and opinions, and I will keep them in mind as I continue to sell on this forum. :)
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I can be extremely patient on payment, but I am not on communication. If you need time just let me know, but don't leave me not knowing what is going on. At this point , not only has he lost (or delayed)you potential sales , but used up your time on messaging him and starting threads, when a simple message from him would have spelled out what was happening in the sale and kept you both on the same page.
I have always believed a bad start to a deal greatly increases the chances of a bad end, so it is best to move on, while it is still easy to do so.
If you have a problem with the sale, just man up. It is not going to get better leaving me hanging, and I can't force you to buy, nor would I want to.
 
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