Any advice for a father to be?

C

CorpsmanUP!

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3 and 1/2 years ago I asked a similar question here- "Any advice for a young gent who's about to be married?"

http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=509042

well we are now expecting our 1st in April. His name is Jonah and he already has a Bible in which I have written many things. I am excited to give him his first knife eventually, and it got me thinking what other things should I be doing/ not doing, and see what the guys at blade
Forums thought.
 
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Sleep all you can now, because you won't be getting any for awhile. When they are really small all they do is, eat, sleep, and poop so it can be tough interacting with them. However, once they start crawling and walking it gets real fun. My first is almost 2 (this month) and we have another boy on the way in April. Also, gas drops (just get the cheap ones) and hylands teething tabs are two of the greatest things ever invented.
 
23 years ago I was in your shoes. Today my son is a Hospital Corpsman and is getting married next Saturday. :)

The best advise I can give it to spend as much time with him as you can. It goes by fast. You can buy him all the knives you want but in the end, its the memories that are attached to it that he will take with him.

Congratulations to you and the Mrs. :thumbup:
 
I have often thought that the best first knife for a collection would be the scalpel used to cut his cord. These are disposable, but they are also, once used, considered biohazardous waste. My guess is that if you asked the doctor and explained that you are a knife collector, it could be saved and perhaps soaked in alcohol and then given to you as a special keepsake.
 
Be as involved as possible. Change diapers, feed, bathe, etc. Your wife is gonna need lots of support. Take shifts for who's gonna be up at night. Her body just went through a crazy thing and now she has to recover from that.
Do you have family/friends close by ?
Find someone to watch Jonah for a few hours after you've been home 4-5 days with him. Take your wife out for a simple lunch or dinner date. A few hours "off duty" will feel great by that point !

It's a great adventure and unlike anything I'd ever done. It's a heckuva learning curve.
I've got 2 boys and find it a daily challenge and blessing.
 
zackfraser said:
Sleep all you can now, because you won't be getting any for awhile.
Click to expand...

Quoted for truth! Your life is going to change- big time. NOTHING will be the same for you and your wife, ever again, once that baby comes out. Luckily, most of the changes are for the better. Babies are great. And yes, they do grow incredibly fast. Enjoy every moment you can with them, because they change so much and so fast- your baby is never the same from one day to another. One second he won't be able to even lift his head, and the next, he'll be running around the house screaming and jumping and climbing and into everything, babbling incessantly about dinosaurs and whatever else he happens to be interested in that day.

FWIW, I cut my son's cord with my Spyderco Paramilitary. :D Hopefully he'll get a kick out of being given the knife used to cut his cord- when he gets old enough, of course.

I didn't ask or tell anyone ahead of time about using my own knife for that little procedure. When it came time to cut the cord, out came the Paramilitary, and ZING- through the cord and back into the pocket it went. The nurse blinked at me, but didn't say anything, and nobody else in the room (including my wife) was the wiser. :thumbup:
 
The first year is the most important. You are making brain connections. Talk to him,sing to him and hold him as much as you can. We have eight children(most are adopted) and our fourteenth grandchild will be born next week.
I cannot imagine any thing more satisfying than bringing a child into the world and being part of their life as they start their own family.
 
Also, maxpedition bags make excellent diaper bags. Even with one child you feel like you have to pack for a three day trip just going to the grocery store. I am going to be buying a Maxped Sitka here in the coming months so I will have enough room for both kids belongings.

Buy diapers by the case if you can, until they get in between sizes, then buy the smaller packs until they fit the next size. Same goes for wipes, buy in bulk, the initial cost is a little higher, but there is nothing worse than running out of diapers at one in the morning.
 
Great advice already given here. I'll also mention something my Mother-in-law said when our first was a few months old. I mentioned that I'd be happy when he's out of diapers and can talk and she said I'm just "wishing time away".
Man do I realize how right she was now. My son used to fall asleep on my chest but that phase only lasted a few months. Now he's almost 4yo and my daughter is 7 mos. Don't take any moments for granted and remember when times get tough that they too will pass. Kids go through lots of "phases" good and bad.
 
I remember when Liam would fall asleep on my chest, some of the best naps we ever had. Now he's pushing two and won't let me hold him at all unless he's sick.
 
I always tell my grandchildren that I'm so glad I never had any kids because they are such a nuisance. They just roll their eyes. :D
 
I know this is community, so I'll say it as gently as I can. Get some, while you can. Take advantage of the happy-hormones your wife is experiencing right now.

Okay, now that the important stuff is out of the way.:D Yes, it will be more work than you ever thought you could handle. Yes, it is worse at the beginning, but it gets better after the first month, or two. Each and every stage of it is hard in it's own way, but comes with it's own rewards. Cherish each and every moment.

One little trick my wife and I worked out to get maximum amount of sleep: Have your wife feed the kid about an hour before YOUR normal bed-time. Have her go off to sleep for the next shift. When your boy wakes up the first time, you feed him a bottle and let your wife continue to sleep. I usually slept on the couch with the baby next to me in a basinette. Next time the baby wakes up, it's your wife's turn, and you get to sleep through it. By the 3rd time the baby wakes up, you're off to work, and your wife can go back to sleep for another shift.

This way, you each get to sleep through 2 shifts, and get CLOSE to enough sleep. This works out ideally if the baby can sleep up to 4 hours at a time, which for my kids usually happened around 4-6 weeks.

I've made it through 4 boys. Oldest is 11, youngest is 3yrs. Each is different, and I pray that yours doesn't have Collick!:eek:

Have fun!
 
You have received a lot of sound advice. The only thing that I could add is this: with all the love and care that you can give (and there is no such thing as too much love and care), your child need to learn solid values: in my house there is one simple rule: there is a boss and it's not the son/daugther. You teach him that things are earned, not given just because they are wanted, and you won't have a problem (it worked for me: 2 sons, 29, 27, both college graduates, and on their own, and a girl, about to turn 18, and in college).
 
As others have said, spend as much time with him as you can. May I recommend you teach him to hunt? Time in the woods will not be wasted and will pay huge dividends later.

You can't buy a smile like this.

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Not so sound sappy, but do your best to be the man you hope your son will become.

---

Beckerhead #42
 
In the delivery room, don't take it personally when she says "Damn you, this is all your fault!" :eek: And, during all the contractions and pushing, if you work with your hands, let her hold someone else's! ;) It's a great thing, kids, but know your limits! Learn what causes them, (hint: it ain't this:jerkit:) and be glad we can't have 7 at once....... Most of us, anyway.
 
Gollnick said:
I have often thought that the best first knife for a collection would be the scalpel used to cut his cord. These are disposable, but they are also, once used, considered biohazardous waste. My guess is that if you asked the doctor and explained that you are a knife collector, it could be saved and perhaps soaked in alcohol and then given to you as a special keepsake.
Click to expand...

What a brilliant suggestion!
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The knife which created his independence as a person in separating the cord would indeed be a special keepsake.
 
Hold onto every moment and don't take it for granted. It moves by at the speed of light. Your son will be one of your greatest accomplishments :) You will never have anyone in this world who cares for you so purely and unconditionally as your children. And last but not least after the insomnia subsides enjoy it it's a wild ride!
 
First, there is so much variety between kids that giving very specific parenting advice isn't terribly useful.

Regarding the April 1 date, that's an estimate. A couple weeks early, a few days later, no one knows.

Don't waste a bunch of money on baby stuff. They outgrow everything in like a week. Buy furniture that will last. Accept like-new hand-me-downs from friends and family.

"Natural" feeding is the best. It's healthier, free, and only the Mama will have to get up in the middle of the nights. :)

Don't sweat the dates. If your kid walks and talks early it doesn't mean it's a genius. And if they're not doing whatever by X day, it doesn't mean they're 'slow'. They'll let you know when they're ready to advance.

It's never too early to start the kid's college fund and knife collection.

If you ever wanted to do or buy anything fun for yourself, better do it now. Convertible, boat, motorcycle, backpacking trip... After the kid is born it'll be harder to justify the spending, you won't want to be away, and Wife may not let you.

Best Luck to you and your growing family!!!
 
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