Anyone ever completely complicate your life/change/relocate etc for a spouse?...

sideways said:
I am happy things worked out for you. A functional marriage is a wonderful thing. :thumbup: Unfortunately those seem to be the exceptions these days.
Click to expand...
What is the exception these days are the selflessness, work, and commitment needed for a good marriage. Since those are rarer in our culture these days, good marriages are rarer in our culture these days. For some reason it has become easier for many to ignore the vows they made.
 
In marriage two imperfect people vow to link for life. To expect a perfect mate or a perfect marriage between to imperfect people is ludicrous. Expect honor, commitment and selfishness and keep in mind what Gerald and Betty Ford once said of marriage --- it's a 70/30 proposition. Sometimes you are 70% give and 30% take and other times you are 70% take and 30% give. Betty and Gerald Ford had their share of problems but were still happily married for 58 years. They CHOSE to respect, honor, and love each other.
 
Last edited:
Insipid Moniker said:
If you have the advantage of a better job, vehicle and living situation, why are you the one moving?

Just realized this could come off very snarkily and I meant it as a serious question. There could very well be factors at work that make it either impossible for her to move, or would facilitate you moving.
Click to expand...

leghog said:
In marriage two imperfect people vow to link for life. To expect a perfect mate or a perfect marriage between to imperfect people is ludicrous. Expect honor, commitment and selfishness and keep in mind what Gerald and Betty Ford once said of marriage --- it's a 70/30 proposition. Sometimes you are 70% give and 30% take and other times you are 70% take and 30% give. Betty and Gerald Ford had their share of problems but were still happily married for 58 years. They CHOSE to respect, honor, and love each other.
Click to expand...

My job while currently good paying has ZERO stability and an extremely high stress level. Her mother was ill (cancer) and while I honestly wish she would give it something as simple as a shot here, she made it very clear she just flat out doesn't like the south when we became involved. (We met in NYC)

There are plenty of people who honestly and truly opened up in this thread and I want to sincerely thank you guys for your input and your honesty. I am still very seriously weighing my options however, I find myself leaning toward heading back up North. If it weren't for my best friend being here, I'd of already packed and left regardless if I sold my home or not I think but hey, like most things in life, nobody truly knows whats best and what's wrong. I'll be hoping whatever decision I make someone smiles on me from up in that skyline because it will be filled with trials and tribulation, that's for certain however, the rewards and knowledge will hopefully pay off handsomely.
 
When I was 30. I was offered a blank check job with broad ridge to run services out of Asia. I had just met my future wife who was 19. She was built like you would not believe and a hell of a brain. Its been 9 years together, and we have a great life. She has an mba and works with the cfo of one of the largest hotel chains in the world. We eloped in Costa rica and were wed in one of the top ten ranked Eco luxury resorts in the world. I'm also clean and sober now after being a functioning drug addict for a decade trying to od myself to end his life. You never know what life has in store for you. But its usually better living and going through the journey with somebody you love...

Ps my wife is also pragmatic. You guys need to decide financially where it would be better for you two...
 
Last edited:
The fact that you are asking a bunch of strangers for advice just shows you do not want to commit to this plan.

You want my story? The woman I love had a dirtbag for a brother who drove himself off the road one night in a drunken stupor leaving a 13 year old son behind with no one to care for him. The end result was our moving from San Francisco to the State Capitol, both of us changing our work situations, and becoming parents to a troubled teen.

But you see, I love her. Her family is my family. You do what is right even if it isn't easy or fun. And I wouldn't change a single decision I made.

So man up or back off. You know exactly what you want to do, so just do it and get on with your life.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top