Best gadget for $300 or under

You could probably rent Charlie Sheen for a hour to entertain at your kids birthday party.
 
I very much appreciate the very wide and varied range of answers.

Particularly, prostitutes, Charlie Sheen, and my IRA.
 
Casio Pathfinder Solar Atomic, iPad (can you get one for $300?), SureFire Defender, Bose Noise-Cancelling Headphones?
 
I gotta say, this looks pretty damn nice.

http://www.archos.com/products/elements/archos_97titanium/specs.html?country=us&lang=en&#a

Same exact screen as the iPad 3/4 (with 2048 x 1536 at 264ppi), dual core 1.6GHz processor, and slightly thinner and lighter than the iPad. Only 8gb of storage, but it's expandable up to 64gb (about $65 for a 64gb card, $24 for a 32gb). Plus it also supports OTG (on the go) with its micro USB, which means you can plug in other devices like portable hard drives. Best of all, at $250, it's less than half the cost of any iPad, even if you buy a memory card.
 
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