Brendan -
Sounds to me like you're making this too hard on yourself. As Yvsa said, it ain't rocket science. Just concentrate on how *simple* it is, and you'll have no problems.
The way I do it, there are three stages; coarse stone/emery paper; oilstone; strop 'n' steel. From working blunt (ie I've taken the fine edge off in the course of normal wear and tear) to shaving sharp is about 10 minutes. Total outlay on tools & materials (excluding the oilstone, which I inherited... But you can pick up a nice old secondhand oilstone in any street market in the UK for about ten pounds British) is about a fiver.
Step one; coarse stone, aka 'scythe stone'; perfectly acceptable Chinese made ones are available in your local cheapie-shop for a pound. Or you can buy a sheet of medium-fine emery paper and wrap it round a rectangular block of wood. Go at it gently, concentrating on keeping the angle which the blade forms to the stone (a) constant (b)shallow (ie acute). Work down both sides evenly in the same direction, obviously (I always sharpen away from the point towards the handle). Count the number of strokes you use on one side so you can do the same number on the other side. When you think you're about there, look at the blade face-on. If there are any places where you can see it - where it's as thick as a human hair, say - that's a flat spot and needs work
Step two; oilstone. Put a drop of penetrating or sewing machine oil on the stone (about the size of a ten pence coin) and smear it evenly over the stone with your fingertip. Work the blade on the stone as you did with the coarse stone (concentrate on direction & angle) but your angle should be slightly less shallow, by two or three degrees. You should now have an edge that 'bites' when you lightly rub the ball of your thumb across it (use your common sense when doing this...)
Step three; strop 'n' steel. Your oilstone now has a slurry of grey oil on it. Mop this up with the rough, unpolished side of a cheap leather belt. Now lay the belt across the back of a chair, and work the blade up it, one stroke with one side, one stroke with the other. Again, open the angle up by two or three degrees. When you're done the blade should be sharp enough to slice unsupported paper with a draw cut. For the final edge, apply a steel - your chakma, if it's hard enough; but the round shank of a screwdriver does a great job IMHO - further opening up the angle by one or two degrees, alternating strokes one side and then the other as before.
That ought to do the trick. At all three stages, *don't* apply undue pressure; press down as hard as you would when pushing a moistened postage stamp onto a letter.
Simple as that. I learned to sharpen when I was twelve years old, and I've never had any problems getting an edge on anything. It's only difficult if you make it so...
Good luck!
Tom