well now hold on there fellows....

why i just finished watching all dem der Lynn Thomson videos and I think these nightshade knives are just the ticket! So i wen toff today to my local Cold Steel (cold from the grave no doubt....woooooo) and why i did buy them out of every dang item they had.
so i gets home...the missus is MIGHTY upset with me for spending all that money but she watched dem videos too and is now super paranoid about the impending invasions that are supposed to be a daily occurrence accroding to Mr Lynn Thompson.
Well we did spend the better part of a week setting up our house with all the new home proteciton equipments. In every flower pot inside and outside the house we gots dem evil black Nightshade knives stuck into the soil, around 1000 or so total, cant be to careful you know? there might be not be time to go run and grab a knife from the flowerpot a foot away what with all these invading criminals types that are supposed to be coming... . By the front and rear doors we have Brooklyn Smasher bats, Indian war clubs, Indian Riflebutt clubs, African walking sticks, Bad Axes, and lots of Boar spears. All over the house we have Tantos, Bowies, Fighters, Scimatars, machetes and them CS Special Forces shovel, cuz apparently you can use a shovel as a throwing weapon or a ax...who knew? Its a bit tricky taking a shower now, what with all the black plastic knives ducttaped to the shower stall walls.....one best be carefull when grabbing for the soap, might poke yourself. I know, i dropped the soap and got stuck i the backside one night...
At every window that opens we put ten blowguns with the 20 foot extensions pieces, and an ample supply of dem little darts. Aorund our necks we have about 20 neck knives, tantos, spear points, etc. Gotta have backup knifes on yer neck you know what with all these criminal types that are supposed to be coming......so on my belt i got a Bear fighter, a Recon tanto, Peacekeeper 1 &2, and about ten other big mean fighting knifes. Thats just the right side of my pants. On the left i got swords galore and amace thingy too. Cant be too prepared you know...what with all them criminal types that supposed to be coming. Lyn Thompson sez so. The wifey she likes all them Sharkie pens and dildo shaped koobaton things, cant sez i blames her....our relationship in the bedrooms has gone a bitlackluster, what with standing guard 24 hours a day looking out for dem criminal types that are supposed to be coming as per Lynn.
Ijust spent the day ridding the house of watermelons and manila rope, see, because when i watching dem Cold Steel videos and Mr Lynn Thompson sure had a problem with maruading watermelons and that gang of manila rope. Seems he was always attacking them or fighting them off or sumtin. So i says to the missus as she finished playing with her koobaton int he bedroom, i says we best make sure we got no watermelon or rops inside the house., Mr Lynn sez they are dangerous opponents. We'd best remove the car doors honey she says.....That Mr Lynn also had to fight those a lot with them tanto knives. So off to the garage i go, took the car doors off and the scrap metal guy picked them up for me. Got a few bucks fo that. That was nice of him.
So we been up now for weeks, popping them caffiene pills to stay awake, while watching out for the impending invasion of bad guys. Wifey is in the other room, she done blast the cookie selling Girl Guide with the blowguns. Blew about 50 darts into her. The missus never blown that hard before. Me? i'm bug eyed and whiteknuckled....them dern watermelons we dispatched a month ago are starting to sprout......damn zombies. But i know that by watching the Lynn Thomson videos and by arming myself with all his fine weapons, that i will survive..yes siree.




