Dear TOPS Knives, Please hire someone who knows English to describe your products.

retzius

retzius

Joined
Sep 17, 2009
Messages
1,102
So, TOPS Knives.

They tout they are made in America to exacting specs.

However, if you read the descriptions of the knives on their website, they appear to have been written by a foreign special needs child failing ESL.

Here is a good description of their typical product blurb:

"It is made if micarta which actually improves the grip when wet and is designed to be fatter in the middle to give maximum human hand grip, no matter how slippery from water or blood."

or this:

"To this end, Hawke's Hellion is designed to wreak havoc on both sets of needs specifically for the Survivor to have 2020 vision for jobs big and small."

or this:

"Likewise, it's good practice to pull a knife from the wood by rocking it forward and backwards in line with the blade edges and not sideways or "wide ways" which is left and right of the blade edges; basically, move in the direction of edges, not the flat of the blade."

I would buy one of their products but based on these I conclude they make their knives in America but leave their marketing to Chinese school children, or, they just dont care about the product which makes me want to buy them even less.

TOPS. Take some advice, what you put on your website reflects on your product.

Step it up!
 
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Maybe they spent all of their time in shop class instead of English. I just got their latest catalog and while it's not impressive I do like the TOPs knives that I own.

jwh
 
retzius said:
I would buy one of their products but based on these I conclude they make their knives in America but leave their marketing to Chinese school children,
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Whatever the case may be, let's leave specific nationalities out of it (unless you have proof said writers are in fact from that country).
 
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LMAO sounds not too terrible to me besides "if micarta" part, but my English sucks, so I'm not for hire. You should post this in W&C imo :)
 
retzius,

I seem to recall that the people at TOPS come from Special Operations and LEO backgrounds. Perhaps they were too busy keeping America safe than in getting their 3-Rs down to your satisfaction.

So what are your qualifications? An English degree? :rolleyes:
 
Sal spells stuff like "Spyder" and "Thanx". I'm not buying that crap anymore. :rolleyes:
 
I thought the first and third examples were just fine.
I thought the insulting descriptions of the writers was unnecessary and pretty obviously inaccurate.
 
Good grief, what could you not understand man???

I'm not a fan of the knives, but that wording sure wouldn't keep me from buying one.
 
Must be nice to be perfect. Maybe it's a sign that you should apply for the job and set the record straight? Step up ;)
 
I have only owned one TOPS knife. It was nice, but it came as dull as dull can be. It took me hours to put a working edge on it. Other than that small hiccup, I have been very pleased with their knives.
 
I find it rather amusing that you automatically equate poor grammar to foreign-written material. I'm Chinese, and I daresay my grammar is better than most "Americans'."
 
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There is far worse grammar to be found with many other brands, so who cares...

"How its made" on discovery channel is covering shotguns right now FYI. Much more interesting than grammar BS.
 
This was part of the quotes that you gave: "To this end, Hawke's Hellion is designed to wreak havoc..."
A foreign-born person that doesn't have a decent knowledge of the English language is not likely to have written that. It is just as likely that we have a high-school graduate that was better in gym class than in English class. I was once a teacher in a big city.
Did you ever watch a guy in a burger place try to make change for you?
Sonny
 
squints said:
I find it rather amusing that you automatically equate poor grammar to foreign-written material. I'm Chinese, and I daresay my grammar is better than most "Americans.'"
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Didn't wanna say it, but yea. I'm the same way.
 
Sonnydaze said:
This was part of the quotes that you gave: "To this end, Hawke's Hellion is designed to wreak havoc..."
A foreign-born person that doesn't have a decent knowledge of the English language is not likely to have written that. It is just as likely that we have a high-school graduate that was better in gym class than in English class. I was once a teacher in a big city.
Did you ever watch a guy in a burger place try to make change for you?
Sonny
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Agree. The blurbs look like they were written by native English speakers who were never English majors. A lot of very intelligent people make up in practical ability what they lack in language skills.
 
squints said:
I find it rather amusing that you automatically equate poor grammar to foreign-written material. I'm Chinese, and I daresay my grammar is better than most "Americans.'"
Click to expand...

Apostrophe before the period :p
 
Apparently they do the opposite of most companies: their products are made by Americans, marketed by foreigners.
 
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