Guitar experts? Did I do allright?

Beautiful guitars, man.

An old joke for you musicians...

Three guys are in line for the Pearly Gates, and St. Peter is asking them why they should get into Heaven.

The first guy is a composer, and he tells St. Peter that he created many symphonies in honor of the Lord and brought people great joy.
He gets in.
The second guy is a rock singer, and he says he played a lot of concerts for charity, and he gets in.
Finally, a guy who played in a wedding band comes up, and tells St. Peter he played at people's weddings all his life, bringing joy to this momentous occasion in their lives.
St. Peter says, "Okay, you're in. But bring your sh-t in through the kitchen."
 
ok, guys. one more from me & then i'll shut up.
once again, my apologies to those who already know it.

Word was getting out in nyc about a new jazz club getting ready to open. A trumpet player/band leader arranges an audition w/ the owner.
The first song they play is a ballad, and it's absolutely stunning!
The bar owner, tears in his eyes, says,"Omigod, that was beautiful! What is that one called?" The Brooklynite trumpeter says,"That one's called, "I Love You So F@#$in' Much I Could Just $#!t Myself."
The bar owner is a little shaken, but is able to stammer out, "Ok, play me another one."
So the band goes into a greasy, nasty, slinky, supremely funky groove and when it's over, the owner says, "Wow! That was great! What's the name of that one?" The trumpeter replies,"That one's called,"Why Don't You Get Offa Yer Big Fat A$$ And Go Get A F%&$in' Job." At this point, the owner has made up his mind and tells the trumpet player that they can play there, but absolutely no way can he announce the titles of the songs onstage. "Well, band needs the work.",the trumpeter says and begrudgingly accepts the owner's offer.
On the first night of the gig, our trumpet boy is still p.o.'ed be cause he thought the owner was "stepping on his art". The next tune in the set is a ballad and when the trumpet guy stoops down to get his trumpet mute off the floor, his old, tattered pants go,"rrrrrrrip!" from his zipper to his back beltloop. Our buddy happens to be going commando that evening and is now fully exposed, but he's so mad, he doesn't even notice and just keeps on playing.
Halfway through the tune, a customer comes up and shouts, "Hey! Do you know your pants are ripped and your f@*%in' balls are hanging out!?" The trumpet player stops playing just long enough to yell, "Know it? I f%#@in' WROTE it!":D


"we'll be here all week, folks! two shows on tuesday. try the veal."
 
What's the definition of optimism?

And accordionist with a beeper!

bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
 
Q: How many bassists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Five-one to do it and four to beat back all the guitarists who are trying to elbow him out of the spotlight.

(I was in a band with these guys...)
 
Ok, it's been a month almost, and I still can't play anything recognizable or tolerable to the ears. Not giving up, but this is more difficult than I thought. :)
 
Danbo,

keep it up!

Here is a good site to know about:

http://www.harmony-central.com/Guitar/tab.html

You can get guitar music in tab for just about anything you like to listen to (and much that you don't). Stick with the "power chord" type bands when you are starting to play electric guitar; if you try fancy stuff, you will just get irritated and depressed. Trust me, I know--no one has ever confused me with Steve Vai :(

Besides, it is a Law of Nature that everyone who buys an electric guitar for the first time must immediately learn to play "Smoke on the Water" :D
 
Well, maybe not "Smoke on the water"; but before I die, I WILL be able to play the opening guitar from Led Zepplin's "Over the hills and far away"!
 
Set yer sights higher than that Danbo! That one's easy!

How's about some Crosby Stills and Nash, now some of that can be really tricky!
 
Hey Rugerhead- I was once a drummer- not a GOOD drummer, but I was enthusiastic & liked to hit things very hard, so I traded my bass rig for a broken-down kit & started flailing away w/ a bunch of friends whose drummer had flaked on them. Our guitar player was an electrician's apprentice & has built guitars & amps & etc. for quite a while & had a Peavy F800 (yes ampheads, an 800-watt Peavy "festival series" guitar amp.) That bastard was loud. He built his own speaker cabinets & still had to coast the gain on "2" for fear of inverting the cones in his speakers. Problem was everybody else had to play as loud as he was playing. Mind you this was a rock/punk band in various incarnations from about 1978 to '81. Loud was good. Very loud was better. So loud that you can't focus your eyes because the compressed sound waves have warped your corneas, and when the bass player hits an open 'E' you lose control of your bowels is approaching perfection. Imagine all of that noise crammed together "In the corner over by the Dodge" (to quote Zappa) in a garage. I have some permanent hearing loss in my right ear as a result of that crap.
 
Danbo,
That looks real sweet. I played from about 11 years old till some time in my early 30's. Here's some stuff from my memories book.

memories.jpg


Some stuff missing from the photos are a Martin D-45 (actually an HD-45 -- the H stood for Herringbone), a Fender flat top, and a Fender Super Reverb amp.

My younger daughter and I were going through the old photos a couple of years ago. On the back of the pic labeled 1974, was a note that said, "1974 - Got a haircut". :D
 
Nice set Danbo! Very nice!

I would really like to have an American Strat, American Gibson SG, and a birdseye maple Gibson Les Paul. Hell, I can't even play, but I sure do like guitars. I wouldn't mind having a Martin, Tak, or Gibson acoustic 6 either. God I wish I could play.
 
Na, I think he looked more like Wayne from "Wayne's World". :D

"Party on, Garth!" :D
 
Danbo pack up that gear and come see me!! First we have some good food then we jam!!!!!
Here's the newest member of my PRS family. I think this makes 7. It's hard to remember!!!!
 

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You did well. Crate is a good amp and 15W Solid State is loud enough for practicing.

I bought a used 100W Crate Head last summer. Very nice. Only $100. Nice distortion. I run it as a slave.

You should play other guitars since your style might change over a while.

I think I've been playing for 14-15 years.

The best way to develop your skills fast is to have someone show you the basics (someone who plays the style you are interested in). Plop in your cassette... record... er.. CD and learn to jam to your favorite songs. If you can't figure it out yourself then tablature is next step. However, watching videos of your favorite guy/gal playing is the easiest way. Tab tends to be incorrect in actual playing positions (although the notes are usually correct).

Good Luck
 
Danbo as we did discuss before I do want you to know that ANYBODY would be proud to have your set up as a beginner and even after playing for over 30 years I would still be proud to have your rig!!;)
 
I am envious of Masterchefs new PRS.

I actually am holding out for the dark blue/black PRS 24 fretters. That's my next...
 
axolotls the Whale Blue custom 24 was my first!!I've got a Green custom 22,burgundy custom 22,Green custom 24, Amber Violin Archtop hollowbody,Cherryburst custom24 and the Whale blue custom 24!!!! Music has been my life for almost 35 years. Danbo stick with it and in a year or so you will be very happy you did!! Two very important things that I found over the years, first get a nice guitar( which you now have) second learn a few cool licks to get you inspired followed by some important techinques such as basic picking(proper way to hold the pick and so on.) These good techniques will help form good habits which will allow you to learn quicker and learn more. If you can't find anyone to help you just pack up that rig and head up by me,you know we'll have fun and I'm sure the cops will show up!!! I play through 3 Marshall full stacks!!!!
:D :eek:
 
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