Coaldigger,
You asked us to lay out the gear we use so here we go. My son and I are Hennessey users and think their gear is great. Don't get me wrong there are many other great hammocks out there we just really like the Hennessey.
We both use Expedition Asym hammocks with side zipppers. They are relatively lite and sleep really really great. We wanted a hammock that had integral bug screens an asym shape for easier angle sleeping (angle sleeping equates to laying flater in a hammock) If we had it to do over we would have gotten the slightly bigger Expedition Deluxe or the Safari Deluxe. (all three hammocks mentioned can be found here
http://hennessyhammock.com/catalog/#hammock )
Something my son and I did right the first time, I think, is
not going with the smaller asym type tarp that came standard with the Expedition Asym hammocks we bought. We purchased the upgrade to the hex shaped rainfly. I believe this is a must. The smaller flys okay unless the wind is blowing the rain with force and where we live/camp it tends to really blow when it rains. A secondary great use for the larger fly is a dry spot to cook and or a great shade spot on a hot sunny afternoon. Hennessey's rainflys can be found here
http://hennessyhammock.com/catalog/rainflys/ and you can upgrade flys on all the hammocks to the hex fly for about 20 bucks (although I believe the safari comes standard with the hex fly).
We threw out the standard tree huggers that came with the hennessey. We instead purchased slapstrap pros from ENO which can be found here and many other places
http://www.rei.com/product/768731/eno-slapstrap-pro
Then a couple weeks ago I came across this
http://youtu.be/1iJTjful66M My son and I purchased carabiners and rappel rings to do the mod and it works unbelievably well. I can now set my hammock up with one hand in about 4 minutes including rainfly. Substantially less with both hands (I had to try just to test if it could be done under severe distress.)
Here is a couple of picks of him swinging on the front porch a couple weeks ago. He says we don't use them enough so he decided to set it up and read in it.