Joke: How many women with PMS...

[kronckew]

does it take to change a light bulb? (ans. from a female, of course)

A: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !! . .



I'm sorry. What was the question?

an oldie but a goodie, thought it was appropriate to post this once a month. the girlfiend disagrees of course. tomorrow they take out the stiches.

 

[Daniel Koster]

good for one large chuckle from NWAR

 

[Sylvrfalcn]

Question: How many rednecks does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: All of 'em. One grabs hold of the bulb, and the rest of 'em drink 'til the room starts spinning.

Sarge

 

[raghorn]

Q: How many REAL MEN does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None. REAL MEN aren't afraid of the dark.

 

[Kismet]

How many Irishmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Five.

One to change the bulb, and four to stand around and talk about how grand the old bulb was.






(My only ethnic joke. I've posted it before. Sorry.)

 

[Esav Benyamin]

Thank you all for the additions to my "light bulb" file.

Now, how many Bladeforum members does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

19.

1 trying to screw it in with a knife.
2 to debate how unsafe it is and recommend a Leatherman Wave instead.
3 to counter that it is indeed possible with a knife if only it was a [insert favorite brand name here] and it'll only cost your deposit on your car.
4 to tell you that a fully serrated version is better.
4 more to say that a plain edge works better.
1 to come in recommend a Dirty Harry .357 and be done with it.
2 more to warn against the blood trauma that would be inflicted by broken shards of glass and recommend Kevlar gloves, vest, and helmet.
1 more agreeing with the Kevlar idea saying, "I've been there. Still got scars on my thumb." And finally,
1 moderator to step in to close the thread because it's either gotten way too long, or people are beginning to flame each other.

Of course, the light bulb never gets screwed in in the first place. But what do we really care anyway, when we've already fitted our knives with Tritium inserts and SureFire mounts?