Knife Guy Jokes

Oct 14, 1998
Too much heavy stuff lately, time for some fun, like:

How many knife guys does it take to change a light bulb?

NONE - knife guys work better in the dark.

Lets hear some more from all you knife nuts.
I remember a thread awhile back called "you must be a knife nut if" which was really great.
So this Knife Knewbie is standing around watching the Smith at his forge.
Smith turns away for a minute and the Knewbie reaches out and picks up the blank the 'Smith has just been pounding the hell out of. Of course, it's still hot and the Knewbie drops it on the anvil with a loud clang!
The 'Smith tries to hide his smile as he turns around with a small grin on his face and says, "Was it hot?"
Knewbie says
"Nope! Just didn't take me long to look at it!"

(I LOVE asking them if it was hot!)

I cut it, and I cut it, and it's STILL too short!

There was a cartoon in Knife World Paper some years ago, wish I still had it.

It showed a picture of a young boy sharpening his dad's new knives in a vise using a metal file.

The boy said to his dad, " Just thought I would sharpen your knives for you! "

You had to see it for the full jist of it because the old man's expression when he saw his boy doing this was the whole thing!


" Knife Collectors Are Sharp People -- Most of the time, that is! "

a Ghurka infantryman, assaulting a bunker, comes across an enemy soldier and swings his khukuri.

The enemy soldier, surprised that he's still alive, says "Hah! You missed!".

The Ghurka smiles and replies: "Shake your head".
santa has just emerged from the chiminey all sooty and this little kid is watching from the stairs thru the posts on the railing, and santa turns to him and says...its too bad you saw me timmy, now im going to have to kill you.....(ok its not a knife joke)

You know we have to keep our day jobs so we can afford our toys!

My joke was bad enough! It's ok, Tom - I'm not crazy about Santa anyway. Attempted humor shows good attitude (I can appreciate that).

Thanks for trying guys!
We'll revisit this one from time to time!