^ A pickup truck full of drunk rednecks.You and your Bud would have lost that fight.
Because drunks are notoriously straight shooters?
Joking aside, I have a story for the OP.
When I was in the service, I was an MP assigned to Berlin, Germany. This was just before to slightly after the wall came down.
The Grunewald was the local forest we did our field training in. One night while out in the woods, my turn came for guard duty, and there came a scratching on my shelter half door.
"Hey, do you have a flashlight with you?" was the first thing out of the previous guard's mouth when he saw me stir. I answered that of course I did, and where was his? He said in his tent, and there was a huge pig standing between him and his tent.
Now, the Grunewald is home to the
Gruney-pig. That's what we called 'em, anyway. They were plentiful, and not at all shy.
So, I grab my flashlight, take the guard's .45 and go over to the other guy's tent. Sure enough, there's a pig standing on the other side of the tent from us. The hump of its back/shoulders was a few inches taller than the shelter half. I tried to make some noise to see if that'd work, but no go. The pig just turned and stood facing us. I informed the pig that if it tried anything, I'd be forced to shoot, but the pig remained unimpressed. We stood like that for about a solid ten minutes that seemed like a half hour before the pig decided to saunter off.
Once he turned, I scanned the treeline with my flashlight, and caught the reflection of a ring of pig-height eyes spaced evenly around our camp. I didn't do a head count, but the number was pretty impressive. That was probably the uneasiest guard shift I spent in the service.
Now, had some idiot not left our dinner trash on the ground the previous night for the foxes to tear into -- thus attracting the pigs to the camp -- we probably wouldn't have seen the Yogi Bears of the Grunewald at all on that trip.
As for the gun.
Well, I'm just real glad the pig decided that he didn't find it offensive. I've never had less faith in my armament for a given situation. (Though I was glad we had at least the .45 and not just a Maglite.)